selflessness
How To Make Gratitude A Way Of Life
Life has certainly not been easy for me recently. First and foremost, my iPhone, email account, bank account and credit card had all been hacked by some very clever cyber-criminal. Soon after, my brother went into hospital for the second time. I was feeling rather sorry for myself until one day, after visiting my brother in the hospital, I was delayed while driving home. I had to stop at a junction to allow oncoming traffic to pass. A hearse was passing by on the other side of the road.
“God bless the deceased and their loved ones,” I softly prayed.
As the funeral procession moved closer, I noticed that the flower wreath beside the coffin had a ribbon with the words: Beloved Daughter. In a flash, all my own problems seemed to evaporate, as I thought of the bereaved parents of the deceased. Here I was, complaining that I could not access my email account, while other people were grieving the passing of a loved one. Although it was a brief, random experience, it made me take a step back and take an honest look at my life. It caused me to reflect upon the many blessings in my life and, apart from my brother’s current health condition, the ongoing well-being of the rest of my family.
The hearse experience was highly synchronistic and definitely a sign from spirit. The Universe no doubt had an uncanny hand in ochestrating this occurence, as it mimicked an similar experience I had almost 20 years ago! Back then, my son had been born three months prematurely and suffered a minor brain hemorrhage as a result. Statistically, the doctors told me, the odds were fortunately in favor of him surviving such a premature birth. Still, the four months that he was in hospital were probably the most harrowing of my life!
Empaths Need Firm Psychosocial Boundaries
Psychosocial balance is tricky for the empath. It requires managing expectations, checking our reactions and emotions, and most especially setting boundaries. Because it is so easy for us to link into the feelings and emotions of those around us, empaths often forget that others may not respond in kind.
For the empath it’s all about balancing your intuitive gifts with your expectations, and finally your responses. Work, friendships, relationships, all the things that encompass our daily lives, require vigilance to ensure that balance is maintained, or chaos will ensue.
For the Type A empath, jobs, friendships and relationships can end very abruptly with major repercussions. The more assertive empath tends to have the motto of “do unto others before they do unto you.” They will leave a job, a relationship or a friendship at the drop of a hat. The more subdued, timid empath tends to stay in miserable job situations, one-sided friendships, and sometimes downright abusive intimate relationships.
At work especially it is very important for all empaths to remember that there is almost always going to be some personality clashes. Others do not always view us favorably. Remember that you are there to do a job – your job. Staying focused on your work, the requirements of that job and your performance is your primary responsibility. Confronting someone, especially a superior, with “what’s your problem, I know you don’t like me” is counterproductive. Similarly the typical response of the introverted empath to quit, or at least never address any issues, is also futile.
Yes, it can be gut-wrenching or infuriating for empaths to know beyond a shadow of a doubt that a co-worker or boss doesn’t care for them, or has it out for them, but utilize your gift! As an empath you can read the feelings and intentions of others. This gives you a map to the personalities you are dealing with. Use that information to moderate your own responses to the situation and the individuals you are dealing with in your professional environment.
Let Us Be Kind To One Another
We live in a strange world where we place so much importance on who we know, what we own, what we be believe, who we vote for, and (as silly as it is) what we look like. Instead, we all should be placing more value and importance on how we treat one another, and not be so unkind, selfish, and judgmental. Not to mention all the distractions created by modern technology and materialistic pursuits.
It is very hard for anyone to be truly spiritually aware and live a life of higher consciousness in today’s mad world. Living in a holy way, like the Saints of the Catholic faith, is almost completely out of reach these days. The Saints got it right first time around, and they are an example of how to live in a selfless, ‘do unto others’ kind of way.
We will ultimately be held accountable for every thought, word, action and deed. I think it is very egotistic to think that all that is needed is one lifetime around and then ‘ta-da,’ you get granted entry to eternal bliss. Just for claiming your are religious, a ‘good person,’ or spiritually ‘evolved’? Never! Doesn’t work like that.
Do you consider yourself a saint? None of us are. I certainly don’t consider myself one; not by a long shot. But one does notice the self-righteous attitudes of some among us, like they are better than the rest. Spirit doesn’t condone that kind of pride one bit.
Faith and spirituality is indeed a personal choice for every person. But there are some undeniable, eternal truths and universal laws that apply to all of us, no matter what we choose to be believe or who or what we worship.
For me faith and spirituality is about believing and doing what the Bible recommends. But it is not just about attending church services on Sundays, and then going against God’s Word the other six days. It’s about being humble, being pure of heart and mind, and being kind to one another. We are all connected and until we begin treating everyone as our neighbor we shall know no lasting peace or harmony.
Healing The Karmic Patterns Of Ancestral Trauma
Sometimes during meditation, I recall past events and childhood memories that had been long forgotten. A recent vision, for example, took me back to the home I was raised in. But the scene was one I do not remember.
I saw myself as a little girl, around three years old, and members of my mother’s family were visiting us. Everyone was singing and playing instruments together. I saw myself watching them and enjoying the music, but then felt guided to look diagonally upward to another scene happening simultaneously.
In the other scene I saw my ancestors; at least that is what I concurred because they were going back in a line. Behind my great grandmother, who was playing the piano, there were people who I sensed to be her parents, and then her grandparents behind them, and so on.
In that glimpse into the distant past, I observed how the behavioral patterns and family dynamics of our ancestors, some of it dysfunctional and unhealthy, had become the patterns of my family. I also saw how these patterns were passed on to me and how it has shaped the patterns in my life and my own family to this day.
I then invoked the Heavenly Light to wash over all of us: myself and my family, my living relatives, all my ancestors who came before us, as well as all of our future descendants. I prayed that all of the disharmony in my family lineage be healed, and also that any other families and individuals we had disharmonious interactions and relationships with be healed too.
In Hawaiian culture this kind of healing prayer is known as Ho’oponopono. It is an ancient spiritual practice of reconciliation and forgiveness, which in English literally translates to ‘to make right,’ or ‘to make good.’ Ho’oponopono is essentially a personal responsibility and forgiveness prayer or ritual to heal, among other things, feuding families and ancestral trauma. When practiced repeatedly, it is said to balance out karma. I do believe in praying for those who wronged or harmed us, because within their healing we find our own as well.
Now Is The Time To Celebrate Life!
The time has come to recognize how far we have come and celebrate the sheer joy and privilege to be alive. Although Covid-19 is still around, and I personally know several people who are just now recovering from the illness, we are in a much better position now than a year or two ago. We have a lot to be grateful for as we start to work our way towards the future.
So, let’s celebrate! While still taking appropriate precautions, it is wonderful to be able to go out again, eat in restaurants and shop inside stores. A feeling of lightness is everywhere these days, with people really appreciating the ability to get back to some semblance of normal.
I see people smiling and laughing again while they are out and about, doing their daily errands, meeting friends, and attending functions and events. It seems even strangers are friendlier and more open to positive conversation and a more optimistic outlook nowadays. What a welcome change!
It is particularly satisfying to focus on and reconnect in person with the people who are important in our lives and make us feel happy. This year Mother’s Day was especially meaningful for many of us. It is always a beautiful opportunity to showcase the love for our mothers, both those who are still with us in this life, as well as those in spirit.
However, spirit impresses on me that honoring our mothers should happen more consistently than just one day per year. Each May, many of us resolve to show our love and respect all year through. So, how are we doing so far? Are we still honoring our mothers long after her special day is over?
A quick call, some surprise flowers, a little gift for ‘no reason’ are all lovely gestures that don’t take a lot of time or money, but can mean the world to mom, or stepmom, grandma or other maternal role-models who have touched our lives.
Jupiter, Pluto And The Judgment Of Solomon
One of my favorite astrologers, Christopher Renstrom, is an uber-wise storyteller who has a knack for bringing profound astrological messages to life. He recently spoke about the separating Jupiter-Pluto energies, likening both Jupiter and Pluto to judges: Jupiter symbolizing Zeus, the benevolent King of Mount Olympus, and Pluto to Hades, his brother, the King of the Underworld.
In many ways these energies are opposite to one another, one reigning in the light (Jupiter), the other in the dark at night, beneath the surface of things (Pluto). Yet, both kings preside in judgment over matters brought to their attention.
Christopher went on to relay the story of The Judgement of Solomon from the Hebrew Bible, in which Solomon rules between two women both claiming to be the mother of a particular child. The explained that this story beautifully exemplifies Jupiter and Pluto in their role as judges over life and death.
In the story, two women had given birth, but tragically one of the babies did not survive when the mother accidentally rolled over on the child in her sleep. In the morning, she secretly switched the two babies, giving the deceased newborn to the other mother. This mother awoke and found the lifeless child, but knew this wasn’t her baby. She knew the living child belonged to her instead, but the other mother denied this and wouldn’t give up the living child.
The case went before King Solomon, who agreed to listen to anyone’s complaint, no matter what walk of life they came from. And so, each mother, in-turn, argued her side, with no corroborating witnesses to back them up.
Solomon listened intently, then asked for a sword. He then ordered the living child be cut in two, with one half handed to each of the mothers as a fair resolution of the dispute. But the true mother of the living baby implored the king not to kill the innocent child, but instead willingly relinquished the baby to the other mother. The illegitimate mother, however, demanded the child be killed so no one would have it, dispensing her own morbid sense of justice.
Neglecting Your Own Needs Will Destroy Your Relationship
Some people are in really toxic relationships without realizing it. How do you know for sure if you are in a bad relationship? Well, often it is as simple as asking yourself a few basic questions.
Am I safe? Am I truly happy? Do I feel loved and supported? Are my most important needs being met? If you answer no to any of these, you may need to reassess your relationship.
Some people get caught in a dead-end relationship trap. They feel trapped and do not know how to get out of a bad situation. It can be very hard to leave someone you love. But sometimes that is what me must do in order to love ourselves.
A leading cause of failing relationships is often a lack of open, honest communication about our hopes, dreams, fears, and needs. It is very hard sometimes to bring up a subject that is uncomfortable, but remember that you deserve to be happy. It does not serve anyone to put your own needs last.
Self-worth also plays a major role. Do not put your own needs aside because you fear you cannot do better. Stay true to what is most important to you and ask for what you want!
If your current partner cannot meet your needs or refuses to respect your wishes, maybe your future does not align with theirs. Finding the right person is really what you need to do to be true to you and who you are.