life design
Being Your Strongest, Most Authentic Self
Many people tend to think that being vulnerable and open is a bad thing, because it makes them vulnerable to getting hurt in life and especially in relationships.
When someone disappoints or hurts us, whether deliberately or inadvertently, it is usually because they have deep wounds of their own that stems from their past, especially for their childhood. These unresolved traumas are often dormant and unconscious.
One might feel this is still no excuse to treat others poorly, or that they should know better. However, because these people typically have not done much inner work or self-healing to really know how to be in loving, happy, and functional relationships. I’m not condoning their bad behavior, but if they actually do not know any better, then how can one expect it from them?
I find people who are stuck in such patterns of hurting others are usually very much defensive and in denial. If you gently suggest what you may need from them, or bring up an aspect that the two of you could work on together to improve the relationship, they tend to instantly throw what you say back in your face and make it all about you. Suddenly, all of it is your fault.
This defensive behavior is a clear signal that this person has a lot of hurt, and is either fearful or unable to work through it. Therefore, if you bring up something that triggers their pain, they immediately see it as a threat. They feel attacked, or that they are being made a scapegoat.
Hope Is A Spiritual Superpower
My oldest granddaughter told me on New Years’ Eve that one of her favorite things in life is hope. I then asked her what the word really means to her? She explained that it was very comforting to imagine the new year being better than the past year.
She said hope is what motivates her to try new things and be the best she can be. With every bit of motivation there is always an underlying sense of hope. Hope that things will indeed work out for the better and that it is possible to achieve your goals.
I agreed with her that hope gives people the incentive to really go for what they want in life and strive towards goals that they might not otherwise believe possible to achieve. It gives people the courage to take chances in life that may catapult them into a better life.
But I also introduced her the wisdom of Dusty Springfield’s popular song, Wishing and Hoping.
Wishin’ and hopin’ and thinkin’ and prayin’
Plannin’ and dreamin’ each night of his charms
That won’t get you into his arms
So, if you’re lookin’ to find love you can share
All you gotta do is hold him, and kiss him and love him
And show him that you care.
Dusty understood that wishing and hoping is all good and nice – but without real action to set things in motion we may be wishing and hoping for a very, very long time! Don’t get me wrong, hope is a feeling that as a professional psychic medium I want every client to leave my office with in their heart and mind. Knowing that they have much to look forward to and that anything is possible in their life.
Seasonal Crystals To Prepare For The Spring
The second half of the winter season, after the solstice, is an ideal time to establish new patterns and laying the groundwork for the coming spring and summer. Now is the ideal time to start adopting healthier lifestyle habits and plant spiritual seeds that will bloom in the months ahead.
Crystal that pairs well with this kind of winter energy work is clear, transparent quartz. It is a metaphysical staple for many practitioners, regardless the time of year, as it facilitates mental and emotional clarity and helps clear out negative energies. However, like a pristine winter pool of icy water, it also does not tolerate shadows and secrets.
Another winter-friendly crystal is selenite, which resembles an opaque spike of white ice. It acts as a cleanser, sweeping away the painful memories of the past and embracing the transition into a new year. Selenite is also closely associated with guardian angels and spirit guides, so it helps us to tap into their guiding wisdom more clearly.
Warmer, more fiery crystals can also help us generate some sparks and bring new heat to even the coldest, most hibernated of intentions. Citrine, with its inviting citrus hues attracts good luck and prosperity to the bearer. This crystal helps us stick to our goals and fulfill our greater purpose.
If you are wanting to increase your creativity and productivity this year, try fiery carnelian, with its sweltering deep orange and red-brown overtures. Its leading energy associations are inspiration, determination, and tenacity. Also, red or fuchsia garnet (appropriately also the birthstone for January) increases motivation and allows us to manifest our goals and aspirations.
Take Some Time To Envision A Better Life
The most valuable thing we can do for ourselves is to envision a better life and future for ourselves. We are the creators of our own reality and the masters of our own destiny. If your life is not the way you wish it to be, then you can begin to change it for the better starting today.
The best way to begin is to take honest inventory of your life – focusing on those things that are within your control – to determine what achievements and successes you are proud of. At the same time, also take careful look at what you might want to do differently or accomplish going forward.
If you are unhappy with your life as it currently is, know that your circumstances do not need to remain the same for the rest of your life
If we look at our current lifestyle, prosperity and well-being and do not like what we see, it is usually a sign that our level of self-worth or our sense of feeling deserving has been very low and that we have most likely succumbed to negative thinking and beliefs in recent times.
To transform our lives for the better, we must then change our thinking and visualization habits, in order to start attracting the superior conditions and improved quality of life that we would prefer to have in our lives.
It’s perfectly okay to dream of greater glories, whether that means more money, a new home, a loving partner, or something all-encompassing such as delightful happiness, superior health, and true abundance.
Why We Need To Give Up Hope
I am not someone who believes much in having ‘hope.’ I never hope for things. To me ‘hoping’ means ‘clutching at straws’ and ‘selling myself short.’ To merely hope for something is to remain in uncertainty and demonstrates a lack of trust and faith in the abundance of the Universe.
I learned this the hard way in my own life. In the past, whenever I used to ‘hope’ for a change or outcome in my life, it seldom brought me anything worthwhile. In fact, it usually just prolonged the misery.
The notion of ‘hope’ reminds me of the popular adage: “I’ll believe it when I see it.” People often say this whenever they deem something impossible. And herein lies the problem with the word ‘hope,’ as it carries the same negative vibe: “I don’t believe it likely or possible, until proven otherwise.”
This kind of intentional energy is contrary to the creative power we carry within as spiritual beings. Constantly expressing doubt and skepticism is certainly not a sign of higher consciousness or spiritual awareness. Instead of demanding proof for what we wish for, what we should be saying instead is: “I’ll see it when I believe it.” This carries a completely different vibration, don’t you agree?
Do you find yourself being more of a ‘hoper,’ instead of a believer? If so, then you may find it helpful to change this kind of negative, defeatist energy when you need a change in circumstances or you are wanting something positive to manifest in your life.
Mistakes Are Necessary For Spiritual Growth
Have you ever felt like you made a wrong choice or bad decision that caused everything to fall apart or steered your life went in the wrong direction. Maybe you knew it was the wrong choice, but you did it anyway? Well, every mistake is an opportunity for growth. There are no mistakes in life, only lessons. Without mistakes, there is very little personal and spiritual growth.
Let’s say you choose to date a guy with a bad reputation. Then, as your gut feeling had warned and your psychic advisor had predicted, he cheats on you, and ultimately dumps you for someone else. Your inner guidance told you it was not a good idea; spirit advised against it. Yet, still you chose to find out the truth the hard way, by experiencing it for yourself.
But then you still do not learn the lesson. You go and do it again. You take him back and trust that he has changed as he has promised. Then he does the same all over again. Do you continue to stay and have him hurt you and take advantage of you? If you do, you still have not learned the lesson.
So, what is the lesson here? Well, the first thing you would have to recognize is that the lesson is not about him. It is about you. It is about establishing your self-worth and building your self-esteem. It is about accepting the fact that you, like anyone else, deserve to be loved and to be happy. And it is about learning to trust your inner guidance and pay attention when spirit guides you.
I have worked with many clients over the years who find all kinds of excuses and justifications for staying in a bad relationship, a toxic workplace, or a dysfunctional family environment.