grief
The Last Cat Standing
Seventeen years ago, I put my cat, Boo, to sleep and sent her back to Heaven. She was a uniquely ornery, but brilliant cat. Boo was a black cat and we actually had full conversations that my friends would be amazed by. Boo lived to the ripe age of 17.5 years.
I was so desperately sad when she passed, that only a few weeks after her departure, I went out and got new animals to replace her. At first, I picked out only two new cats at the Humane Society. They were put in their carriers, awaiting their new home. One was a calico colored cat, and the other was a beautiful grey cat with white stripes.
But as I was walking out of the kitty area, an anonymous black paw suddenly grabbed at me, snagging my sweater. Being spiritually aware, I decided to stop and pay attention. Was this little black cat my new Boo? Well, you guessed it! I left that day with three cats.
I named my new black kitty Shiva. He was only five weeks old at the time, which means he was born right around the time that Boo died. He was very sickly in the beginning. The veterinarian, one of my Yoga students, told me he was unlikely to make it.
At the time, I did not feel comfortable telling my veterinarian that I actually do energy work on animals, and that I somehow knew this was my Boo kitty’s reincarnation. I have been doing animal energy healing since I was a child, and I have been doing animal readings for 20 years.
Reclaiming Your Power When A Relationship Ends
One of the main reasons it is so painful to release someone when a relationship ends, is because we have usually invested so much of our time and energy in our connection with that person. In essence, what we are truly missing when we mourn a relationship are parts of our self that we have given away. What we are mourning is the loss of our hopes and dreams, not merely the presence of the person who is no longer in our life.
If this is something you are currently struggling with, I recommend the following ritual designed to help you reclaim your power after a relationship break-up, so that you can restore your inner wholeness and resume your search for true and enduring love.
Supplies
- 3 votive candles: 1 blue, 1 green, 1 yellow
- 1 aqua marine or clear quartz crystal
- rain or sage incense wand
- small mirror
- 3 copper pennies
- 2 tbsp of fresh or dried mint in a small bowl
- 2 tbsp sea salt
Forgiveness Is The Solution
Forgiveness may be the path to a truly happy and fulfilled life. In his book The Forgiveness Solution, Dr. Philip Friedman puts forth the idea that all our emotional concerns, such as judgment, anger, and grievance, come from our inability to forgive. When we hold onto this emotional baggage, it harms everything. Hurt people hurt people. Taken to the extreme, it may lead to self-harm, or harm to others. But there’s a way out of this vicious cycle.
The first and most important step is to learn to forgive ourselves and develop, what Dr. Friedman calls ‘self-regulation skills.’ In essence these skills are defined by the classic Serenity prayer for courage to change what we can, acceptance of what we cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference. In addition, becoming wholly healthy, physically, emotionally, and spiritually, will better allow self-forgiveness.
When we engage in our daily spiritual practice, we should ideally include a mantra about forgiveness. It may take a while for the idea to take root. Habits take about 30 days to become routine, but after you’ve begun to forgive, you can let the pain go by the wayside.
Keeping a positive attitude is essential to the process of forgiveness. This doesn’t mean that you have to be happy all the time. What is does mean is that setbacks and obstacles are regarded as challenges to overcome, rather than insurmountable hurdles.
Comfort In The Arms Of An Angel
I often use one of the rooms at the local library to meet with new clients. Recently, while I was waiting in the library’s cafeteria for a client to arrive, I noticed a radiant light coming in. It was shining on a very old lady seated just across from me. I then noticed there wasn’t a window at all near either of us!
Soon it became clear to me that this unusual light that was shining down from Heaven. Then there appeared also an angel, standing right by her side. As my sight focused I could make out more of the angel, and I also noticed that the old lady was seated in a wheelchair. she had an oxygen tank attached to the wheel chair. She was with a younger women, who looked to be her daughter.
I did not notice much else, just how amazing the light was and how beautiful her angel or guide was behind her. I sensed it was there to comfort her, as she was in a lot of pain and probably would not remain long in this world.
I then realized it was time to leave to meet my client in one of the private rooms, but as I was leaving the cafeteria I heard someone calling my name. I stopped, turned around and saw it was the old lady’s daughter calling my name as she walked towards me. She then told me we went to school together and I immediately recognized her!
Connecting To The Universal Power
I have been in a very contemplative situation lately; probably because there have been so many deaths of loved ones that I have been so attached to. We all accept the idea that one day we will leave this existence and move on to another. But what happens in between? Where do we go immediately after leaving this realm? Is it safe? Will we enjoy it there? Do we get to come back? All of the above may be a small part of what plagues us, while we are trying to establish and maintain ourselves in the meantime.
My greatest desire for myself right now is to find a way to connect to the grand Universal Power and to solidify that connection. This will enable me to go about my daily existence with inner peace and calmness, and not allow myself to get mired down in the minutia of circumstances that I cannot change.
My first step is to understand why I am here. I feel part of the reason I incarnated into this world was first of all to help repair my karmic debt, by becoming immersed in some pain and suffering as a human being. There is no other world that I have been made aware of that would enable me to do this.
Coping With The Pain Of Loss And Grief
Going through grief is a very natural response to loss. The more significant the loss, the more intense our grief will be. Grieving can result from the passing of a loved one, losing a job, divorce, loss of health.
Coping with loss can be overwhelming. We usually go through all kinds of difficult and very unexpected emotions – from shock to anger to disbelief. Sometimes we also feel guilty that maybe there could have been more one should have done. And then there is the sadness, which is hard to even put into words.
The pain of grief and bereavement can, and often does, also disrupt our physical health, making it very difficult to sleep, eat and function normally. It is very hard to think straight at such a time, but these are normal reactions to significant loss.
Holding On To A Broken Relationship
Are you waiting for him to return to you? Has your break-up stopped you from living your life? Have you decided that no matter what anyone has said to you, that you know that he is coming back to you? Holding on to a broken relationship is a common occurrence in many people’s lives. One person moves on, another does not.
When confronted with this dilemma, you may believe he will be back. I know him; he can’t function without me. He needs me. He knows we are spiritually connected. However, this is often not the truth of the situation. It is simply your ego egging you on to believe what you want to believe.
I usually ask people to go into their ‘gut’ and take the heart out of it. But still I will get, “My gut says he will be back.” This is ego, because the response is so quick and without breathing in and allowing your guides to give you the proper answer.