memories
Resentment And The Empath
Do you have a tendency to re-experience past injustices — real or perceived – while holding on to those old feelings of anger connected to them? If so, it means you are harboring some form of resentment. Empaths are especially prone to resentment, simply because we tap into emotions, past, present, and future, much more than most people.
Resentment forms when we become angry towards a person or situation, and then hold onto that anger. Some people harbor their resentments for many years, refusing to let go of it. Over time, whatever caused the original anger and initially led to the resentment, may be forgotten, but the resentment remains. It is like a still-smoldering ember left after the flames of a fire have subsided. The fire no longer rages, but the ember remains smoldering, and all it takes is a spark to set that fire raging again.
For the empath this rekindled ‘fire’ may be triggered every time they enter a new relationship. No harm has been done, yet, but the empath may be so on guard, and overly vigilant to any slight that resembles their past hurt, that it easily sets off another destructive blaze. They expect the worst and try to protect themselves against it, but in the process the thing they fear the most may re-emerge from the past, unhealed resentment.
For many empaths, lack of boundaries also lead to dashed expectations, typically followed by resentment. As an empath, you feel the heart of the person, and know that there is love. Once connected into the, “I know they love me,” their bad behavior can be overlooked. Continue reading
Shadow Work
Shadow work is the process of learning to speak your fears, anxieties, shame, grief, and rage before Spirit, and having it witnessed by humans. The latter is needed to heal toxic shame and to get you comfortable with being your authentic self in front of other human beings. Shadow work is speaking out whatever is currently uncomfortable for you to say in front of others. For some people shadow work is speaking out about one’s successes, happiness, gains and accomplishments.
Sharing works best when you are specific and refer to date, time, place, and people involved in actual events, as well as describing the specific emotions experienced at the time and describing actual behaviors and actions that occurred.
A shadow work group, like 12-Step programs, provides a safe sacred space and a confidential environment, where others are there to listen and witness your journey of healing, without interfering. Shadow work groups understand that they are just there to witness, and know that the real work is between you and your Higher Power.
Shadow work groups give you a safe place to practice saying things that normally are not spoken, or must be said with careful attention and energy. When you share precarious, painful, fearful or shameful information with such a safe group, you will slowly, with the help of your Higher Power, be able to heal the emotions and energy connected to those issues and events.
In time, instead of those issues and events ruling you, you will have the space to make choices – choices on who to talk to in your life circle about delicate personal matters, as well as when to do it, how to do it, or if it is even safe to share with certain people, or not.
How To Overcome Negative Thought Patterns
There are times when one may be feeling very serene, and completely at peace with ourselves and the world. One may even be feeling highly satisfied with the spiritual growth and personal healing you have accomplished thus far. Then, quite unexpectedly, you lose your sense of alignment. You suddenly feel ‘disconnected’ from the source of our being.
This feeling is especially triggered when one feels overwhelmed by life’s responsibilities, or the constant demands of others. And once we slip into this negative state of mind, many deeply buried, unpleasant memories tend to emerge in our consciousness in the form of haunting ‘flashbacks.’
I recently heard a friend referring to this experience as cognitive distortion. We can so easily begin to catastrophize, and expect the ‘other shoe to drop,’ once our anxiety level becomes this amplified. The mind is powerful and under these circumstances we tend to indulge in a lot of ‘what if’ thinking. The mind races, imagining all the worst case scenarios as potential outcomes.
This kind of catastrophic thinking typically takes our mind into two directions. Firstly, it puts a truly negative spin on the current situation. And secondly, it causes us to anticipate all the many, many things that could possibly go wrong in the future.
Polarized thinking is another problem for some of us. This thought pattern is when we only see things in terms of right or wrong, and this can lead to setting unachievable standards for ourselves and others, as well as send our stress levels through the roof! Polarized thinking crops up when we find ourselves basing our hopes and expectations on, for example, getting that dream job, impressing other people, finding our soulmate, becoming famous, and so on.
My Lives Between Lives
Recently, I had the privilege of being a ‘case history’ client for a friend of mine, who had recently returned from completing a past life regression on life-between-lives. I have been fortunate enough to have had wonderful experiences with past life regression in the past, but the ‘in-between lives’ experience was something new for me, and I felt honored that she asked me to partake as one of her case studies for her course assignment.
During our session I was taken back into the past, and received imagery of previous lives. Glimpsing previous lifetimes was to help me see more clearly lessons learned, or not learned. My friend was a wonderful facilitator, as was the help received from my own master spirit guide.
In our session, I learned where my fear of fire originated from. To date, no past life reading I have received has ever touched on the origin of this fear. I have now discovered that my fear of fire relates to a more recent life, in what appeared to be approximately a century ago.
I was a male soldier in the Navy. My uniform was white, and my father, like in so many of my other past life regression experiences, played a significant role in this life also. He was a senior staff member on that ship. I also saw the Star of David during the regression, which suggests I was of Jewish faith in that life.
That particular life experience ended for my father and I when our ship caught fire. My uniform also caught fire! I recalled the flames, and then drowning.
The Linear Time Trap Of The Past
It is said we do not know what time is. We also do not know where it comes from, and we definitely do not know where it goes! And according to Albert Einstein, the famous physicist, the distinction between past, present and future is only an illusion, because space and time are fluid. Yes, such are the mysteries of the fourth dimension.
Linear time may be an illusion in scientific terms, but in our daily life it is still the time that we cannot stop or control. That clock keeps on ticking, and the cycles of night and day will forever come and go. Every morning, the sun shall continue to rise, and the Earth will progress on its annual journey around the Sun.
However, our experience of time goes beyond the everyday linear. Did you know that there is also such a thing as spiritual time?
Surely you have observed that whenever you are doing something really unpleasant or boring, time can certainly drag on. For example, I recently had to wait for some medical tests that would determine whether or not I was developing breast cancer. Thankfully, the tests came back negative, but I remember thinking of those awful four weeks of hospital visits and biopsies as being the ‘longest month of my life!’
On the other hand, time can also pass so quickly whenever we are having a good time and enjoying ourselves. Why would this be? Well, when you are really delighted with something, your soul, your spirit, your higher self becomes fully engaged in the pleasant experience you are having. In simple terms, when this happens, you literally lose track of linear, reality time itself and your personal, spiritual time shifts to the front. This is the time of your true spiritual self.
Connecting With Loved Ones In Spirit
We can connect at any time with our loved ones who are no longer in this world. They are with us always, no matter where we are. Whenever you feel the need, you can communicate with them, be it a grandparent, parent, sibling, best friend, or anyone else who you had a meaningful relationship with while they were alive.
Connecting with our loved ones in spirit is not as complex or difficult as it may seem. You just have to believe you can, and you absolutely will. You can project yourself in your mind to any place you wish. It can also be a time in the past, that you wish to revisit. We have the power of our mind and if we only use it we can go wherever and visit with whomever whenever.
If you have the desire to see them again, you can ask for them to visit you in the dream or in the astral realm, or you can go into a meditation and visualize, and connect that way. Close your eyes. Remember them, as they were in life. Recall the feelings that you experienced when you used to be around them, the love that you shared.
Your heart may start to feel ‘tingly’ and you may start to hear their voice. You may even receive a message from them. They may tell you how much they love you. And they do. Always. It is that very feeling of love, that true, pure emotion, that connects us to those we love on the Other Side. Love is the very energy that created everything.
Do not ever feel hopeless that you are disconnected from or abandoned by your loved ones. They are a part of you forever, and they are right where you are now. They merely exist on a different plane now.
Aromatherapy For Stress Relief
I have been using essential oils for many years. In the 1990s, I made it a point to study them and become certified. At that time aromatherapy was already very popular in Europe, where it was seen as a viable adjunct therapy. Science has gained more insight on the impact of scent on the brain, our emotions and our well-being.
Stress originates from the limbic system, and our sense of smell is the only one that is linked to this part of the brain. Before we might even become aware of the effects an essential oil or fragrance may have on us, the molecules from the essential oils we smell are already at work on our limbic lobe.
Successful real estate agents know the power of smell, and often suggest you bake some chocolate chip cookies, or brew some fresh coffee before an open house, or simply simmer cloves, cinnamon, and orange peels in a small pot of boiling water, to evoke a homey, welcoming smell.
Scents also trigger memories. A scent from your childhood, that created a warm, secure, peaceful feeling, is something you might want to re-create with essential oils.
When the mind relaxes, the body follows. We all experience stress at times, and although essential oils cannot magically make a situation disappear, one may benefit from the relaxation effects that aromatherapy offers.