selflessness
A Smile Is Contagious Too!
As we continue to find our way through the seemingly never-ending twists and turns of the COVID-19 pandemic, it is understandable that many of us are anxious, frustrated, and worried. Our lives and health are still at risk, our jobs and businesses remain in jeopardy, and parents are unsure about sending their children back to school.
Even so, there is a light at the end of the tunnel as many inroads have been made. There seems to be a feeling of increasing lightness and hope as the restrictions are gradually being lifted. In some places, people are nearly back to pre-pandemic norms, but for many of us many challenges and restrictions remain for the time being.
If you are feeling stifled and frustrated by the circumstances, remind yourself that it is the little things that we will come to appreciate after having gone without them for so long.
For example, with masks no longer required in some outdoor settings, we can now see each other’s faces again! And is it not wonderful to be able to make even the tiniest connection again with a smile?
Whether it is a neighbor you have known for years, or a stranger on the street, why not take the opportunity to smile at them as you pass by? Grin at the cute kids playing outside, or the adorable dogs owners are walking. Appreciate the little things. Gratitude and appreciation is empowering. Kindness and compassion is healing. And a smile is powerful. It can transform someone’s day in an instant.
Smiling is universal. In every country and culture, people smile. A smile represents kindness, joy and happiness. A smile can break through worries for a brief moment and make someone’s day. A smile can be reassuring or comforting when support is needed most.
Are Your Erasing Your Blessings?
Our good deeds and random acts of kindness are never in vain, even when they are not acknowledged or appreciated. Our good deeds are written up on a ‘good deed chalkboard’ in the spirit realm. The unselfish gifts of our time, money, and resources as well as our labors of love bring us many blessings in this lifetime and the next. When we are kind and generous to others, we are also showered with good fortune in return. We know this from the ‘golden rule’ of ‘do unto others’ found in many religions and spiritual traditions.
Buy I have read for many clients over the years who are kindhearted and loving people, but complain about their life being very difficult and deprived. They never have enough money, or they cannot find love, or health and well-being seem to evade them. “I am always helping others, but I get nothing in return,” they might say.
Why is this the case? Why are these generous, caring people not being blessed more often for their good deeds? Well, my guides have made the spiritual cause of this very clear to me. It is my understanding that we do not only add items of charity and compassion to the list of entries on our ‘chalkboard,’ but we also delete or erase them!
You see, when we do a good deed, it gets added to our list of potential ‘return blessings.’ But, if we go around bragging about it, boasting, showing off, telling people how generous or kind we have been, those good deeds become nullified, neutralized, erased. It loses its metaphysical power and spiritual meaning. It can no longer bless us in return.
Birth Order And The Empath
Most of us are familiar with the notion that the personality traits of the firstborn are typically different from the middle sibling, or the youngest child in the family, and so on. But many empaths do not realize how they may be impacted by their birth order in the family.
In The Birth Order Book, author Kevin Lemar gives a detailed outline of these so-called ‘birth order’ characteristics and qualities.
Firstborns, as well as only children, for example, are often associated with leadership attributes and stronger personalities, along with being more protective, fearless, and reliable than their siblings. However, the firstborn may also exhibit some less desirable traits, such as being controlling, bossy and impatient.
The middle-born tend to be social butterflies and peacekeepers, who are focused on fairness and keeping everyone happy. The youngest-born tend to be fun-loving, outgoing, creative, free spirited and can be adept at manipulating others to do things for them.
Only children tend to be mature for their age, perfectionistic and conscientious, but may feel the burden of high parental expectations.
The Firstborn Empath
My experience with empaths has been that the firstborn and only child empaths are indeed more protective, fearless, independent, reliable, but in the empath these protective instincts are magnified tenfold.
They also tend to feel it is their responsibility to solve every human problem and protect everyone around them, regardless. I often see a very enhanced sense of responsibility.
Harmony In Your Relationship
How does one achieve true harmony in a relationship? This is probably the most elusive aspect in most relationships these days. Sadly, a happy and healthy relationship cannot be achieved without it also being a harmonious relationship!
To achieve harmony in any relationship, we need to address the following two aspects with honesty and courage.
Firstly, what do you require from the relationship? Are your needs being met, or is the relationship all about them? Too often people settle for a bad relationship instead seeking to fulfill their own wants and needs.
Remember, you matter. You must also be your priority, not just your partner. Your wants and needs are a priority. If you put your needs aside and put everyone before yourself, you will never find harmony or joy in your relationships.
Make a list of your top ten wants or needs. Then make a list of your top five deal-breakers. What will you not tolerate or settle for? Once you have clarity on what you need and expect, you can more easily figure out what to do about it.
A healthy relationship goes both ways, with comprise. Do your best to see that you stay true to your wants and needs. Too many people settle, because they either think they cannot find someone better, or they are scared to move forward on their own. But we must be brave to achieve what we desire in life.
Tell yourself that you deserve to be happy and that you are going to find it. You deserve it! You are worth it! If you put all of that out to the Universe and believe it, it will happen for you when the time is right. Belief is key. If you believe it, you will achieve it.
The Light At The End Of The Tunnel
As the days get longer and the weather gets warmer in the Northern Hemisphere, there is a feeling of lightness that permeates everything. The saying “April showers bring May flowers,” is especially true this year, with wet weather helping the grass to turn green and the perennials to bloom.
Around the world, hope currently springs eternal, as more vaccines are being administered and COVID-19 statistics are starting to improve. We are all ready to get back to a semblance of normalcy, after more than a year of our lives being turned upside down and families separated.
Some of us are still in lockdown or subject to various restrictions. Some days are better than others. We are not entirely out of the woods yet, but at least it seems we are getting there, slowly but surely.
This past year of social restriction and isolation has however been an opportunity to reflect and make some needed changes to our lives. Although most people did not anticipate such an upheaval for so long, the additional time in isolation has allowed many of us to re-evaluate our life choices and really focus on what we want to accomplish in future.
Some of us have concentrated on charity. Some have turned to activism. Some have focused on self-care and self-healing. Regardless of our choice of focus, many of us have become more determined to make a difference in the world. This truly is one of the many blessings that has come from all the chaos.
It is important, however, that when we set these new intentions for our future, not to overreach with impossible goals or temporary plans. If feasible, choose a course of action that will be sustainable long after the immediate pressure of the pandemic has dissipated.
A Sincere Apology Is Good For The Soul
One of the most difficult things in life is knowing when to apologize. It is obvious in some situations, but in others not so much. There are times when we need to weigh out all our options. Is the situation worth an apology, even if you are not the one who created a problem?
Knowing the right time to apologize is critical to the resolution. Was it done intentionally, or was it unintentional? Did the action cause others stress, worry, or pain?
You must also ask yourself if you can live without apologizing the rest of your life. Is it worth losing a friendship, leaving a group, resigning from a job, or not speaking to a family member ever again?
The good old Golden Rule can always come in handy in this dilemma. If you have done something that you would not want done to you, then apologize and seek atonement! Many people find it almost impossible to apologize. They struggle to acknowledge their own part in an argument or wrongdoing.
Some just do not seem to understand their actions were unacceptable, or they always feel that the world is out to get them. There is no compromise in their mind. They always try to twist every situation to make it seem like it is another person’s fault.
For some people, on the other hand, an apology seems to roll off their tongue a little too easily. When a sincere apology is made it must be followed by actions. Actions speak louder than words. By not repeating the offense, for example, it shows a true and sincere apology.
Sometimes all the other person needs to hear is a sincere, “I am sorry.” When we accept responsibility for our actions, we tell others we are sorry for hurting them. It is not always easy, but releasing guilt always is good for the soul.
How To Practice The Art Of Gratitude
My life has not been without its challenges. Nevertheless, I love my job, have a beautiful son, an adorable husband and supportive friends and family. Therefore, irrespective of current world events, I genuinely have a lot to be grateful for!
Gratitude is beneficial for all of us, including physically, emotionally and spiritually. For one, appreciating the good things in our lives helps us to be more tolerant and forgiving, with a higher sense of life satisfaction. Grateful people also tend to have more hope and inner peace and feel less anxious and alone.
God, Spirit, the Universe loves gratitude! Those who are sincerely grateful are blessed with even more to be grateful for. Like attracts like.
How does one ensure that you practice the art of gratitude ever day? The following guidelines should help:
Seek Out The Positive
In my own personal research into positive psychology, I became aware of something referred to as negativity bias. In case you have not heard of this, it means that our negative thoughts tend to be more dominant than the positive ones.
An excellent way of counteracting this negative way of thinking is to seek out at least three things in your life every day that you are well and truly grateful for. Try to make this a daily habit. By doing so, it should have you smiling in next to no time!
I remember when I was about 26 years old and in a particularly challenging place in my life. I was advised by a psychic, whom I reached out to with my troubles, to watch the film or read the book, The Color Purple by Alice Walker. It is some of the best advice I have every received. Once I had read the last chapter, I felt so grateful for whatever I had in my life.