self-awareness
Birth Order And The Empath
Most of us are familiar with the notion that the personality traits of the firstborn are typically different from the middle sibling, or the youngest child in the family, and so on. But many empaths do not realize how they may be impacted by their birth order in the family.
In The Birth Order Book, author Kevin Lemar gives a detailed outline of these so-called ‘birth order’ characteristics and qualities.
Firstborns, as well as only children, for example, are often associated with leadership attributes and stronger personalities, along with being more protective, fearless, and reliable than their siblings. However, the firstborn may also exhibit some less desirable traits, such as being controlling, bossy and impatient.
The middle-born tend to be social butterflies and peacekeepers, who are focused on fairness and keeping everyone happy. The youngest-born tend to be fun-loving, outgoing, creative, free spirited and can be adept at manipulating others to do things for them.
Only children tend to be mature for their age, perfectionistic and conscientious, but may feel the burden of high parental expectations.
The Firstborn Empath
My experience with empaths has been that the firstborn and only child empaths are indeed more protective, fearless, independent, reliable, but in the empath these protective instincts are magnified tenfold.
They also tend to feel it is their responsibility to solve every human problem and protect everyone around them, regardless. I often see a very enhanced sense of responsibility.
The Self-Healing Miracle Of Letting Go
In the mid-90s, I had the opportunity to attend The Sedona Method Technique Teacher Training course in Arizona. The experience pierced the core of my being and changed my life forever.
Initially, I was reluctant to go, because I was living in Michigan at the time with my husband and two young daughters. My youngest was around a year old and our older daughter was only five. We had not been living in Michigan very long as we had only recently moved there, and I was terribly worried about leaving them for two weeks!
Nevertheless, I convinced myself to go, because my husband had gone to a previous workshop and raved about how it transformed his life. I sensed it would be good tool to incorporate into my psychic readings and metaphysical work.
When I arrived at the workshop there were attendees from all over the world, including psychiatrists, psychologists, and even scientists. To be honest, I felt a little awkward being thrown in with a bunch of ‘genius nerds’ with various fancy post-graduate degrees. It was a bit intimidating to feel that many of them probably had a much better understanding and formal education on human behavior than I did. However, that did not prevent me from also learning this wonderful technique.
The Sedona Method is based on the concept of Emotional Intelligence (EQ). It is different from intellectual intelligence, because it refers to our ability to recognize and regulate our own emotions, and how skilled we are at using social awareness to find solutions to daily challenges and life problems.
The Sedona Method therefore teaches one how to improve your EQ. In the same way we can go to the gym to strengthen a muscle, or do brain training puzzles to improve our memory, we can also train and develop our emotional intelligence.
Our natural impulse when something makes us sad, angry, or fearful, is to resist and fight back, or shut down emotionally to it. Emotional intelligence requires that we take a step back, take a breath, and release the urge to go with a kneejerk reaction of firing back or shutting down.
Your Beliefs Shape Your Reality
In metaphysics and alternative spirituality the idea that our belief or faith shapes our reality is a well-known concept. This notion is found again and again in sacred texts, ancient religions, and wisdom traditions.
In The Bible, for example, Jesus says, “With a mustard seed of faith you can move a mountain,” and the Buddha says, “The mind is everything, what we think we become.” These are just two examples among many others.
What is a belief? It is simply a thought that we choose to think again and again. Faith is when a belief becomes established as a pattern.
The mind, our consciousness, is where belief occurs. Whatever we choose to believe about ourselves, and about life, becomes true for us. The thoughts we hold in our mind shapes our reality.
‘Old school’ belief and faith is however a little different and maybe less trendy than the modern idea of the Law of Attraction and our ability to ‘manifest,’ that has become so popular in recent years in spiritual circles and the metaphysical community. Yet, it it is still an important spiritual principle.
Our beliefs and biases work as a filter within the brain to organize our experiences to confirm a belief or bias. For example, if someone has a belief that their partner is aloof, or not present in the relationship, their brain will filter out those experiences where their partner is actually active and present in the relationship.
In this way the brain confirms its own biases. Even if their partner is present, caring, kind and open to communication, their chosen belief will overshadow their reality. Continue reading
Stepping Into Love With Faith And Trust
I meditate on moving by faith every day, creating a course of embodying inner trust. I step out into the fresh air and sunshine, surrounded by the artistic heart of God in nature, and I pray for the divine guidance of the day.
Day by day, step by step, the path forward is revealed. It is often shown and channeled to me in the simplest of ways: a whisper in the wind; a sparkle in the water; a bird dancing to her own song in the sky.
Each message received highlights an inner sensing and an external physical movement to integrate it into being. The course starts within, stepping into the sacred space of the self.
The power of movement to internalize a concept is profound. I invite you to take a moment now to literally step into yourself, the sanctuary of your soul.
Simply close your eyes, take a few deep breaths to clear and cleanse your mind, and then begin to mindfully move forward, consciously feeling the contact of the soles of your feet with the ground or floor beneath you.
Feel its temperature, its texture, and the firmness or softness of its support. Notice the articulation in your foot as the heel lifts, presses through the ball of the foot, rises, reaches, and then lowers again until the toes, ball, and heel touch down and plant into place.
Take three slow steps like this, imbued with the intention of traveling deeper into your true self through each one of them. Let the third step bring your feet to join one another side by side, marking your internal sacred space.
Allow yourself some still silent time to stand there, grounded in your own awareness. Keep your eyes closed, your attention inward, and your breathing gentle, as you feel the sturdiness of your legs, and the length and strength of your spine supporting you. Just be there.
Finding The Courage To Heal
All of us will experience some heartache, adversity and grief in our life. It may be a serious health scare, the ending of a relationship or marriage, the tragic loss of a loved one, retrenchment from a ‘secure’ job, sudden bankruptcy, becoming homeless due to a foreclosure, or becoming the victim of abuse and violence.
These major setbacks in life can be truly devastating, and the pain and trauma extremely difficult to rise up from again. In such times of loss or trauma, it is vital to allow yourself to feel your true emotions. To effectively process and heal from traumatic events. hardship and bereavement, we must acknowledge our raw feelings. Grief and trauma are deeply private and personal journeys with no rules and no deadlines.
However, do not allow the ego to keep you trapped indefinitely in a place of anger, bitterness, hopelessness, or self-pity. If left unattended for too long, our initial emotional responses to the negative event can become toxic in a way that simply keeps us away from our truly divine self and our future happiness.
Yes, it is always hard work to release intense loss or trauma and move forward. It takes courage, self-awareness, and inner strength. However, if you proceed with faith, trusting and believing that this too shall pass, and that there is a reason for everything, even if you don’t understand it right now, you will ultimately be able to move forward in a healthy and productive way.
No matter what happens to you in life, you will grow stronger and wiser by working through it. Regardless how intense the dark night of your soul may be, move forward step by step, day by day, trusting that you can heal and will become stronger. Focus on self-care and loving yourself and hold the faith that better days are coming into your life. We all deserve to be happy and have inner peace.
The Wisdom Of Intuitive Eating
I remember reading an article many years ago about a research study conducted with children suffering from various nutritional deficiencies and food allergies. The scientists invited about 20 of these kids into a room with a table on which there was a variety of foods on display. They allowed each child to help themselves to any of the food they preferred. The outcome was astounding!
Each child chose a selection of food that their body naturally would tolerate the best. In other words, they instinctively chose foods that would not a bad for them or cause an allergic reaction. Furthermore, the children also chose more foods containing the nutrients their little bodies were lacking.
This confirmed for me the fact that our intuition or inner guidance system is not merely something we rely on when we are facing major life challenges, or when we are engaging in some form of spiritual practice. Intuition guides us every day in everything we do.
Intuitive eating is very much about honoring the temple which houses our soul. I believe we could potentially become nutritionally much healthier if we learn to trust our intuition more when we make dietary choices, instead of following fad diets and food trends.
Intuitive eating is about challenging modern society’s ‘food police,’ as well as the negative self-talk about eating and food choices many of us tend to engage in.
Intuitive eaters soon find that they eat just the right amount of various foods to nourish and satisfy their body, as they learn to truly recognize their body’s signals. Once you can do this, you are on your way to building a healthy relationship with food.
Be gentle with yourself. Avoid those magazines and influencer images on social media that prompts you to put pressure on yourself to look a certain way. Don’t give energy to such things. Instead, listen to your own body. You are uniquely you, and so is your body. When you express self-love within, you will also express it outwardly. Self-love ‘turns head’s like no designer outfit can!