emotions
Slow And Steady Is The Best Path To Lasting Love
In today’s superficial world of online dating, hookup apps and sexual promiscuity, it’s has become a daunting challenge to find a suitable partner who is genuinely ready for long-term commitment and relationship monogamy.
Also, in the dating scene, people typically wear masks, especially during the initial introduction. Everyone wants to give a good first impression and rarely want to discuss their truth, or past traumas. Dates also like to exaggerate or omit information, to make themselves sound more important or successful than they really are.
A few weeks into a new relationship is usually when the cracks start to show and the truth begins to float to the surface. For example, he comes from a good family and appears to be successful on paper, but he is emotionally fragile, or verbally abusive and narcissistic in relationships. Or, he claims he is totally single when you first meet him, but there’s actually someone else in his life and they’re not breaking that up anytime soon, because they have money invested together or are married.
We too often get so caught up in the fuzzy feeling and fantasy of a person possibly being ‘the one,’ that we forget to question if they are in alignment with what we truly need to add value to our life. Always listen to what a date is telling you, without sugar-coating it for yourself.
Through The Looking Glass
We tend to not see ourselves accurately. We too often choose to focus on our shortcomings and weaknesses, such as we perceive them to be. And I believe we are all guilty of this. I have not in all my years met anyone who was truly satisfied with themselves – until it was sometimes too late.
I was just as guilty of this as anyone else. My childhood was one that I wouldn’t have wished on my worst enemy. I was abandoned by both parents when I was very young. I was raised by an aunt and uncle, who took pleasure in reminding me that my parents did not love me. My aunt also took every opportunity to beat the daylights out of me, while my uncle did nothing.
When I hit puberty, several older males in my ‘family’ began to stalk and harass me. I’d go into the kitchen and soon find myself backed up against a wall. Nobody believed me. Nobody did anything to stop it – not even when I was raped at 16 by a family friend’s son, who was deemed to be a “good boy” and “would never do anything like that.”
I could go on and on about all the horrible things that happened to me, but once I turned that momentous age of 16, and having had the experiences that I have had, I left my aunt and uncle’s home. I went to live with my boyfriend, his sister and their mom. When I left, my uncle dumped all my clothes on the front lawn.
Connecting With Deceased Loved Ones
When a loved one dies, it is never easy. It is always traumatic to lose someone who we have lived with, taken care of, loved and nurtured – be it a partner, spouse, parent, sibling, relative or friend. The feeling of them suddenly no longer being here can be devastating. Even their little quirks, which sometimes annoyed you when they were alive, is forever missed. We suddenly miss everything about them!
Thankfully, the spirit of those we love remain very much alive after their passing. Despite the ‘vehicle they drove around in,’ namely their physical body, may no longer be around, their spirit is still around. They can hear and see us, and they can feel our emotions.
I can tell you that when we call our loved one’s name, they are with us. When we pray for them, they appreciate it. Greatly. The two best things you can do is pray for your loved ones and say their name out loud. Continue to talk to them. And when you talk to them, they respond through sending you thoughts and signs. They also come to us in the dream state when we are sleeping. Write them a letter and put it under your pillow, and try to remember your astral travels the next day.
Your loved ones are never far from you. Love is the energy that keeps us connected with our loved ones. Sometimes they will give you a little visit. Remember to ask and you shall receive. Knock and that door will open.
Crippled By Our Failure To Express Honest Emotion
Expressing our truth openly and honestly, provides a channel for further rites of passage in real intimacy. When we do not convey what is actually bothering us, we impede our communication and inadvertently cripple our relationships.
Because we are gods in the making, who have temporarily assumed a physical form as human beings, we are subjected to the basic emotions of earthly existence. These undeveloped emotional sensations constitute real and necessary experiences, while we take on the Earth experience.
When we are unwilling, or seemingly unable to express these innate feelings, an overt shyness takes hold which manifests as a manipulative need to gain control over other people. As paradoxical as this may seem, repressing our true feelings can make us ever more capable and adept at employing a favorable charismatic strategy over people and situations in order to remain ‘hidden.’
To cover up a deep sense of experiencing oneself as ‘wrong,’ accompanied by a genuine knowledge of presenting oneself as ‘phony,’ a loss of innate power is reverberated throughout the body and mind, coupled by the need to present oneself as invincible and correct.
The soul knows this act of contrition is deceptive, but will support the gesture, so that the human enacting her role may survive in her particular social environment. The person will continue to enact a subversive way of calculated behavior, by seeming to comply, but all the while, determined to be more perfect, right and flawless in personal presentation. In other words, to get her way in the end, a deceitful manner concocts undue pressure, along with the vulnerable defense of protecting one’s motivations from being detected.
Forgiveness Is The Solution
Forgiveness may be the path to a truly happy and fulfilled life. In his book The Forgiveness Solution, Dr. Philip Friedman puts forth the idea that all our emotional concerns, such as judgment, anger, and grievance, come from our inability to forgive. When we hold onto this emotional baggage, it harms everything. Hurt people hurt people. Taken to the extreme, it may lead to self-harm, or harm to others. But there’s a way out of this vicious cycle.
The first and most important step is to learn to forgive ourselves and develop, what Dr. Friedman calls ‘self-regulation skills.’ In essence these skills are defined by the classic Serenity prayer for courage to change what we can, acceptance of what we cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference. In addition, becoming wholly healthy, physically, emotionally, and spiritually, will better allow self-forgiveness.
When we engage in our daily spiritual practice, we should ideally include a mantra about forgiveness. It may take a while for the idea to take root. Habits take about 30 days to become routine, but after you’ve begun to forgive, you can let the pain go by the wayside.
Keeping a positive attitude is essential to the process of forgiveness. This doesn’t mean that you have to be happy all the time. What is does mean is that setbacks and obstacles are regarded as challenges to overcome, rather than insurmountable hurdles.
From Victim To Survivor To Soul Evolution
The process of healing begins with psychological healing, which can then be carried forward to become transformational and contribute to your soul evolution. The original traumatic event or circumstances are experienced as a wound, as it should be. The pain of the occurrence is meant to be a lesson.
To shut this down by being stoic, or to minimize what happened to you, or your family, or your race, or to sugarcoat the experience with so called ‘positive thinking’ are the actions of a victim in denial. To feel the pain, to go through it and come out the other side is the journey of a warrior. This is where you start.
You set up this lesson before you ever incarnated. As a soul, working with your sacred group, and with guidance, you pre-determined these circumstances to create an amazing opportunity to forward your evolution as a soul. Accept what happened, which means don’t fight it, don’t deny it, go through the experience, feel it. Let it affect you, shape you, change you, challenge you.
Victim Stage
If you have a legal battle ahead of you for something such as rape, you will have to stay in victim (or victim survivor) mode as that is what the legal system demands. In fact, you will have to emphasize damage done to you in order to win your case. Even when one must call the police to come to a situation, law enforcement officers counsel people to say, for example, “I think I saw a gun.” This is done in order to get the police out in a timely manner and get it on record. Law enforcement is so overwhelmed that they have to prioritize which calls to respond to. Sadly the same is true for the courts. Emphasizing the danger you are in, or the harm you suffered, is a necessary strategy for legal battles, however, it is no way to continue living your life once the battle is done.
Remote Healing
After receiving a profound remote healing experience, just a few weeks ago, I now know that distant healing really does work! Successful remote healing sessions have been documented in the past, where the recipient was totally unaware that they were being worked on. But I feel that being receptive to the healing makes a significant contribution to the healing process.
My remote healing was done by a couple who work as a team. Their work has had a profound effect on me. The dynamic healing duo includes an emotional intuitive and a medical intuitive. I never had any pain issues with my hips, but they told me that there was a blockage in my right hip, caused by blocked emotions. To my surprise, the following day, my right hip ached!
The healing team picked up on so much information energetically which they could never have known about me, and in addition to their healing session, they gave me tools to assist in releasing any negative, pent-up emotions, as well as letting go of any people connected to my buried emotional pain. When left unattended, old emotional wounds prevent us from moving forward in joy. Old wounds can go far back to childhood, or even into past lives.