anger
Letting Go Of Toxic Love
Social issues Domestic violence concept. Woman victim of spouse intimate abuse and physical aggression feeling hopeless and scared crying in distress powerless to stop violence.
I have been reading for many years for a lady who is one of my dearest clients. I just love her to pieces. But I did not love the situation she was in with the man in her life, and neither did she. But it took her a long time to come to terms with him.
She was raising their child, while she worked and paid all the bills. Meanwhile, he did as he pleased and did very little to contribute to their home or their relationship. Neither did he make any effort to support her and their child. He has substance abuse problems. When he drinks he uses foul language and doesn’t exercise good judgment. Most of all he isn’t a good role model for their child.
He basically just drank and smoked, while he lay around all day. “And on top of that he eats me out of house and home!” she used to say.
“So he eats all your food, doesn’t work, gets to live for free, while contributing virtually nothing?” I asked her many times. I think she eventually had an “aha!” moment when I asked her this again the other day, because recently she told me that she had asked him to move out, and it felt like a breath of fresh air!
She didn’t feel like anything was holding her back now. She is going to start a new chapter in her life and she feels a weight has been lifted off her shoulders.
She was originally afraid of making this change, because they had been together for so long – over 15 years. But she said then she finally realized, “He changed, and he was taking advantage of me, and I allowed it because I thought he loved me, but he is not longer that same person I met.”
She admitted she was insecure and could have chosen a better partner, but felt someone better would have been too good for her. I stopped her right there. Many women I read for settle for less, and they know in their heart they deserve better.
Toxic love … is a parasite of the human spirit. It uses another person’s weakened spirit to survive. It is an emotional cancer that destroys the healthy parts of a person until there is nothing left except an empty shell– unless its progression is stopped! ~ Brad Paul
Bottomline, there was something different in her tone, in her voice when I spoke with her about this big shift in her life. She was so happy, confident and empowered now to do something that was so right for her, after feeling trapped in a situation of toxic energy. Now she doesn’t have to hear foul language, and “the kitchen counter top will no longer be laced with beer cans.”
I am so happy for her. She has a friend who lives nearby should he cause her any grief in moving out. She knows now this is the best possible choice for her and her child. Instead of singing a song of, “Walking on eggshells” she could now sing the proper lyrics to Walking on Sunshine. She made me smile.
Some people just refuse to change, or grow up. Her mate was one of those people that just refused to clean up his act, because he was only concerned with himself and his own needs. So, if you find you feel trapped in a negative situation or a toxic relationship and feel there is no way out, know that you can say: “No more!” All you need is a little self-belief and some courage.
The Secret To Smudging Is In The Smoke
“The secret to smudging is in the smoke.” These were the words of my mentor when I undertook my Ukuthwasa as a shaman initiate many years ago in Southern Africa. I have also come to know that the true intention behind any smudging ceremony is a very significant part of its success.
An initial part of my rigorous training as a Sangoma, or traditional healer, was a self-cleansing ritual using Mphepo, made up of herbs indigenous to Southern Africa.
“Smudging,” simply put, is the burning of certain herbs to create a cleansing smoke bath. The smoke is used to cleanse areas used for rituals and ceremonies, as well as any tools or objects used for such cleansing, as well as to cleanse people. Continue reading
Keep Calm And Blog On!
I have been doing psychic readings now for many, many moons. A favorite piece of advice I have been sharing with my clients over the years is to write stuff down when you are stressed. Just get it on paper, in any way, shape or form that you can!
When you feel depressed, distressed, angry or anxious, simply grab a pen or pencil and express how you feel. Write a letter, or some poetry, post your thoughts on the Facebook, or even blog about it. Expressing feelings in written words can be a huge relief and allows you to get them out of your system and release toxic emotions.
When you write how you feel, you are also letting it go. Many clients have expressed to me that they actually feel lighter and less stressed or anxious after writing a note to God or a short poem. Continue reading
The Sun Will Rise Again
The world seems to be fighting against us. Just as soon as we get out of the bitterest cold winter of our lives, we are hit with extreme heats, tornadoes, storms. Thor, on his winged horse, has ridden through… angry, wild, crazed, keeping all of us on our toes.
In our lives, in our relationships, we have all sorts of weather as well. These ups and downs, the setbacks, the craziness of life and love sometimes make us feel that the Sun has left us forever. It seems as if even the clouds try to cover up its warmth, heat, its nurturing, smiling face. Yet, the Sun always rises to bring light to a new day.
The bright light of the sun shows all in truth, both the harsh and good. Although we can’t see him behind the tornado, behind the storm, he is there. Behind the darkening clouds that overshadow all the light, that trouble the skies with lightening, thunder, and rain, the Sun remains like the Most High Spirit of Light. He is still there. Continue reading
The Fourth Chakra
The fourth chakra, or Anahata is located in the heart center. It is symbolized by a circular flower and 12 green petals called heart-mind. The animal totems of the fourth chakra are the antelope, dove and nightingale. The musical note that resonates with this chakra is “F”. This is considered the heart chakra and love chakra.
The color is green. It rules the shoulders, heart, blood circulation, upper back and lungs. Foods to stimulate the fourth chakra include Lettuce, kale, zucchini, spinach and all green vegetables. The corresponding gland is the Thymus. Physically, Anahata governs the immune system, all blood related issues and circulation. Mentally it governs connection with others’ personal power, while emotionally it governs empathy, compassion, romance, friendship and family love, and spiritually it directs unconditional love. Continue reading
Winter May Come, But Spring Will Always Follow
The delicate African Violets on my window sill are beautiful this season. The window is the best place for them, as each one soaks up the sunlight from the East. The Sun smiles on them this morning.
The key thing with violets that many people don’t realize is that we hurt them the most by over-watering. Water is a good thing for plants, right? Violets, however, are native to the tropics where heat, sun, and a dry atmosphere is more prevalent.
The unique needs of these violets teaches us how to follow our own path. This is the true beauty of nature. See, each of us is different. When we look around us, we can’t follow someone else’s path, or be jealous, or worried that the path they are following is different from our own. Continue reading
The Rosary Is A Powerful Tool
I look at so many people struggling, and so ready to get angry at the littlest things, so disconnected from the divine spark inside of them. I know a great tool to deal with this: I often pray the Rosary and thank God for all of the blessings in my life.
It really works for me. The promise of the Rosary is true, in that it will bring blessings into your life. It has brought so much goodness into mine.
I gave a friend, who is suffering from a horrible depression and feeling of incompleteness, a Rosary to pray. I found that she was happier after learning and praying the Rosary.
I wish I would have known about the Rosary many, many moons ago, but it’s never too late to learn the Rosary and see what blessings it can bring into your life. It really works. Continue reading