energy hygiene
‘Under-Doing’ For You And ‘Overdoing’ for Others?
Are you ‘under-doing’ for yourself, or perhaps ‘overdoing for others’ in order to gain approval and love? Many of us fall into this pattern without even realizing it.
When we are raised to be helpful, agreeable and accommodating, it can become second nature to say yes whenever someone asks something of us.
For some people it can take many years, sometimes even decades, to recognize that constantly putting others first may not always be the healthy or loving choice it appears to be.
Learning to set healthy boundaries is not something most of us are taught when we are young, especially if we have grown accustomed to keeping the peace by going along with what others want.
Many of us know what it feels like to be the person everyone relies on. When something needs to be done, we are the first person people think of. When someone needs help, they call us.
At first this can feel rewarding because we enjoy being supportive and dependable. Yet always being that ‘Yes’ person can quietly create an imbalance over time.
When we continually give our time, energy and attention to others without receiving the same in return, the natural flow of energy becomes disrupted. Healthy relationships usually involve a balanced exchange between people.
Spiritual Self-Care: How To Overcome Energetic Depletion
Do you constantly feel tired, depressed, or simply lacking in energy?
If you often feel drained or exhausted, even after a good night’s sleep, and a medical professional has already ruled out any underlying physical causes, you may be experiencing energetic depletion.
Physical tiredness and energetic depletion are very different, requiring different approaches to correct them.
For empaths, sensitives, and intuitives in particular, constantly absorbing the energies around you and the noise of the modern world can be draining in subtle ways you may not even be aware of.
Essentially, it means you are expending and also “leaking” energy more than you are replenishing.
It can be caused by many things, such as overstimulation, emotional burdens, failing to set boundaries, consuming too much media, toxic people and places, or simply not being present in your daily life.
On a deeper level, energetic depletion can also reflect what is happening within your spiritual life and energy field. When you are disconnected from your intuition, carrying unresolved emotional or karmic burdens, or spending too much time in draining environments, your spirit can begin to feel heavy and dimmed.
The Empowered Empath’s Guide To Spiritual Self-Care
Empaths, sensitives and intuitives tend to be givers. Loyal, sometimes to a fault, and fiercely protective of those they care about… moving at lightning speed whenever called upon.
So, when I say to an empath that it may be time to put themselves first, the response is often mixed.
But, if putting yourself first seems too selfish or too difficult, try something simpler: at least put yourself on an equal footing with those you love and care for.
For many sensitive and highly intuitive people, self-care must be an acquired behavior… and it’s a big one. Empaths intend to be selfless, to help, heal and facilitate those they care about. Wonderful!
But remember, if this is your goal, then begin with yourself. The stronger, healthier and happier you are then the more effective, nurturing and supportive you can be to those around you.
Putting yourself first doesn’t mean that you are doing only what you want to do all the time, and it doesn’t mean that you are suddenly going to ignore those you care about.
What it does mean is making it a priority to take care of your own physical, mental, emotional and spiritual needs. This can be a tall order and quite the task for some empaths. Don’t wait until you are in a meltdown… frustrated and snapping at everything and everyone around you, with little or no provocation.
How To Cleanse And Charge Your Crystals
If you use crystals in your spiritual practice, it is important to periodically cleanse and charge them.
For example, when you first purchase or receive a crystal as a gift, clearing it can ensure that you are working with a ‘clean slate,’ and are able to both fully connect with that crystal and set more powerful intentions for its use.
Beyond this, charging a crystal ensures that we are able to use it most effectively for our purpose.
So, how can you go about charging and cleansing your beloved crystals?
The good news is that this process is quite simple and easy, and you can use the same method to both charge and clear a crystal:
Moonlight
Place your crystal in a place where it can bathe in the light of the moon overnight. Full moon is, of course, the best time to do this, and one night is enough to both cleanse and charge your crystal.
That said, if I am using a crystal for manifestation, I will sometimes leave my crystal for the full waxing period of a moon cycle, from new moon to full moon.
Hold Your Tongue To Protect Your Peace
Some people deal with unresolved pain in their lives, and that pain often shows up in their words. You can usually feel it right away. Their words can feel heavy, sharp, or draining, like they disrupt the energetic balance of a space.
In spiritual work, one of the first lessons one learns is that words carry vibration.
If you’re the kind of person who’s intuitive, empathic or highly sensitive, this kind of exposure can feel especially overwhelming, leaving you emotionally upset or energetically drained. This reaction isn’t a sign of weakness. It’s just your inner guidance that tells you when something’s off.
It’s important to be discerning on a spiritual path. You don’t have to respond to every person or comment. Not every interaction needs a response.
When someone’s speaking from a place of anger, fear, or unresolved issues, you’re totally allowed to take a step back and choose not to engage with it. Silence isn’t avoidance. It’s all about being mindful of your energy use and being spiritually mature.
Take a breath before you react. Bring your awareness into your body and ground yourself in the present moment. Try to respond with clarity instead of emotion. Meditation, prayer, or just taking some time for yourself can help you get in sync with your higher self instead of getting caught up in reactive patterns.
Making Space For New Blessings To Arrive
At the beginning of a new year many people feel pressured to set big new goals, make major decisions, and “get it right” immediately.
But for the spiritually aware person, the real work of new beginnings starts somewhere simpler and quieter. It starts with clearing. It means releasing what no longer serve you, so there’s room for what’s next.
Over time, we all accumulate energy that is no longer ours to keep: old emotions, outdated beliefs, and stale patterns that once were protective but now just feel heavy.
If these things are not acknowledged and addressed, they tend to follow us into the every next chapter. That’s why the start of a new year can be a powerful time to pause and intentionally create space.
One simple place to begin is your physical environment. Just opening the windows can already shift the energy in a noticeable way.
Fresh air helps move stagnant mindset and stale energy out and brings in a sense of renewal. As you do this, take a moment to set an intention to release what feels old and invite in clarity, ease, and support.
Some people also choose to cleanse their space with sage or palo santo. This doesn’t need to be elaborate or ritualized. Slowly move through your space, paying attention to areas that feel heavy or overused, such as corners, entryways, and especially places where you often sit with your thoughts. As the smoke moves, silently name what you’re ready to let go of and the kind of energy you want to keep.
Create Your Own Energy Cleansing Spray
Remember the last time you changed out a dirty air filter from your air-conditioning unit, vacuum cleaner, or your car? Remember how clogged with dust it was? In our living spaces, negative energies accumulate over time just like those ‘dust bunnies.’
Even though we can’t see these energies, there is a way to clear them on a regular basis. Think of it as the spiritual version of house cleaning.
Just as we’re drawn to refresh our surroundings with a good spring clean, our homes and sacred spaces crave energetic renewal, too.
Energies from arguments, stress, illness, or even just the daily grind can leave behind subtle residue. This energetic debris doesn’t vanish on its own. Left unchecked, it can affect your mood, your sleep, and even the flow of abundance into your life.
The first and most obvious step to take is to physically clean your space. Clutter and unwanted items work as repositories for negative energy, so it’s important to get rid of it.
After you’re done, imagine the space being deep-cleaned with an indigo or violet-colored flame. Use this as a silent meditation, and picture the flames consuming all that invisible ‘dust.’
And, just like your body or your car, your space can be cleansed and cleared of obstructions.
The easiest way to do this is to create a personal essential oil blend, which can be sprayed throughout your office and home. If made right, these smell wonderful, although their main purpose is for energy clearing and not aromatherapy.
Here’s what you’ll need to make your very own space-clearing spray blend. The ingredients can be purchased at an herbal supplies or natural products store.