Self-Help
Dealing With Dysfunctional Family Dynamics
Family dynamics can be tremendously complex. These relationships are multi-layered and may have played out for ages. Next to love relationship, and then business, family relationships are at the top of the list for many of my clients.
For many family is a love-hate scenario, which can be particularly challenging. It is said we cannot choose our family, but we can choose how and when, or if, we interact with them. However, severing family ties is a big step and not one taken lightly. By the time this happens the drama, or abuse has been ongoing for years – many times beginning in childhood. A childhood that in spite the passage of time is as fresh and painful as it was when it occurred. If money and or control are woven into the mix, the matter doubles in complexity.
It’s an unfortunate truth that many of the people that I speak with, especially empaths, intuitives and highly sensitive people, have family histories that are rife with conflict, and often also abuse. They often share a feeling of not belonging, being singled out, or being the scapegoat of the family. The suffering is long-term and tragic, with the scars running deep.
Opening Your Third Eye
The Third Eye has been known since ancient times to be a gateway to psychic ability. It is known in the psychic field for its role in deep intuition and spiritual clarity.
Many experts further associate the pineal gland, a tiny organ in the brain, next to the hypothalamus and the pituitary gland, with the Third Eye. Biologically, this gland serves a number of essential functions, from circadian rhythms to the regulation of hormones.
We can maximize this tiny, but critical part of our spiritual being, by ‘opening’ and activating the Third Eye completely. Some experts believe that detoxification, specifically from calcium phosphate, is necessary to awaken its higher functions. Calcium phosphate is a chemical found in many of the foods we eat, as well as associated with fluoride found in drinking water.
Over time, as the pineal gland becomes calcified, we lose the ability to see the world as it truly is – unified with the spirit realm. It is the spiritual equivalent of a pair of glasses with scratched or clouded lenses. Eating a nourishing, beneficial assortment of foods, as well as drinking purified water, will help to rid the body of the toxins that has accumulated in the pineal gland and therefore clouds the Third Eye. A variety of organic supplements and essential oils, when added to an improved diet, can also speed the process.
Dare To Find Your Way Again!
Why should there be a yellow brick road? The answer is simple: everyone should have a personal path to Oz.
In the classic movie, The Wizard of Oz, after losing her way home, Dorothy was advised to follow the yellow brick road. Along the way, she was given a pair of beautiful ruby slippers. She was also cautioned not to remove these special shoes and not to lose sight of the yellow brick road.
There were times when Dorothy threw caution to the wind and walked away from the path. I recall watching scenes from the movie and holding tightly to the edge of my chair in anticipation of the perils faced by Dorothy. There was the Wicked Witch of the West and her army of dutiful, misguided monkeys. There were wind storms and spells in which day was cast into night. There was even a cranky old man who pretended to be the omnificent power of the Universe.
Much like Dorothy, each of us has faced difficult times in our lives when we have found ourselves without direction and far from home. Some of us have even forgotten where home was, while some never want to return. But within the metaphysical context, home is akin to the center within each of us that is the dwelling place of the soul, which links us to our life purpose and mission.
Why I Do Readings
The main thing I notice about being a channel is the focus on what healing is, its purpose, and how being a healer in service to others is held against being selfish.
If someone is fulfilled by sacrificial service (victim-savior relations) and this is their mission in life, then they would likely derive the greatest joys from this kind of sacrifice, because Spirit would bring them seekers who want that type of service. It is a sacrifice, indeed, although often cleverly disguised as a helping venue.
In any case, one can pick any way of healing that resonates for you. For me, I find that I prefer to educate my clients in terms of what an empath can and cannot (or should not do) in my opinion. Personally, I am not fulfilled by victim-savior scenarios. I don’t find them to be healthy on any level.
All the same, I used to fall into the trap of trying to ‘fix’ people, to the point that it was my main modus operandi in life – being prey for others that are seeking life source energy from others. I discontinued doing that when I realized several truths:
Checking In With Yourself
In today’s hustle-and-bustle, busy world there is sometimes the need to slow down and take break. Take a moment to say hello to yourself. Do a check in. Catch up with you. As a wise man once told me, “You must start by starting!” Quite so, because it makes things much more confusing if we think about it too much.
The best time to begin your day is the previous night, when you go to bed. What’s your current practice before going to sleep? Have you gotten your clothes ready for the next day? That is a handy practice that many people do. Have you gotten your soul ready as well? That is truly where to begin.
Saying hello to your soul is a powerful healing tool. Doing it consistently, just like having coffee or tea in the morning, brings you closer to yourself and takes you to a higher perspective. By you treating yourself kindly, it spreads outward. As you heal yourself, so shall you heal others.
A Few Minutes Of Daily Self-Care
I often tell my students to take some ‘me time’ each day, even if it’s only five minutes for self-care. And I have heard 101 excuses as to why someone cannot do this, ranging from parenting responsibilities and career, to house cleaning and maintenance. These excuses typically start with the words, “I have to…”
At one workshop, I had several people offer their excuses for not having even a few minutes for themselves on a daily basis. Then I narrowed it down to a simple question. When you have to go to the washroom, do you hold it in all day long, and all night, because you ‘have to’ do something else? After the laughter stopped, because I did do an exaggerated imitation of someone ‘holding it’ by rolling on the floor in agony!
And then I asked the next question. By holding it all day and night, and writhing in pain and agony, what did I accomplish? How much time did I waste focusing on this issue of ‘I have to go,’ but ‘I don’t have time.’
This is the simplest way to explain time management versus wasted energy and time. I take a bath or shower each day, as do most people. I am usually at least a few minutes under the water in some way. Water is my peacemaker and my calming force. It energizes me and charges me for the day.
Healthy Boundaries – The Best New Year’s Resolution!
The best New Year’s resolution many of us can work on in 2019 is to create healthy boundaries with the people in our lives. These boundaries don’t have to be all about just creating space or distance between you and a few toxic people and things in your life. It can also include keeping yourself from being exposed to negativity on social media, or avoiding those foods you are intolerant to. In 2019 I recommend we all take a moment to think about the things we do, say, consume, and the people we spend our time with. Whatever it may be that brings us down, or steals our energy, needs to go. And no more people-pleasing.
Dr Seuss says, “Those who matter don’t mind, and, those who mind, don’t matter.” Well, it’s true. Those people who have a problem with you, because your belief system is different from theirs, for example, are absolutely out of line! I have said it once and I will say it again: the world will be a very boring place if we all had the same ideas and way of thinking. Diversity is what keeps our world going. So it’s okay to be different. I am big on keeping it real and being authentic. I refuse to be a conformist.