Life Design
Are You Stuck In Victim Mode?
We all have had at least one very bad experience in our lives: a twist of fate, a major setback, an intense trauma, a tragic loss. In these moments of extreme adversity, we are usually victims of circumstances beyond our control.
But these challenging life events typically serve a higher purpose. Everything happens for a reason. It is therefore vital that we gather whatever hard-earned wisdom, personal growth or self-empowerment we possibly can from such experiences. If we do not, our suffering would have been in vain.
We can only accomplish this if we get up, dust ourselves off, find resilience within, and courageously begin to move forward.
Sadly, some people tend to become stuck in victim mode long after these experiences. This obviously does not promote their personal growth and well-being, nor does it improve or change their life for better. On the contrary, as long as we remain trapped in a victim mentality, the negative life experience will have served no purpose and the hardship we suffered will have been in vain.
All the challenges, lessons and trials in our life are invitations and opportunities for us to grow and expand. This is true transformation. Easy lives are meaningless lives.
Now, we are sometimes allowed to complain and say ‘life sucks,’ because from at times we also get caught up in the learning and transformation processes of other people. However, we are also allowed to consciously reject that. We are not required to take on the lessons of others.
Being Your Strongest, Most Authentic Self
Many people tend to think that being vulnerable and open is a bad thing, because it makes them vulnerable to getting hurt in life and especially in relationships.
When someone disappoints or hurts us, whether deliberately or inadvertently, it is usually because they have deep wounds of their own that stems from their past, especially for their childhood. These unresolved traumas are often dormant and unconscious.
One might feel this is still no excuse to treat others poorly, or that they should know better. However, because these people typically have not done much inner work or self-healing to really know how to be in loving, happy, and functional relationships. I’m not condoning their bad behavior, but if they actually do not know any better, then how can one expect it from them?
I find people who are stuck in such patterns of hurting others are usually very much defensive and in denial. If you gently suggest what you may need from them, or bring up an aspect that the two of you could work on together to improve the relationship, they tend to instantly throw what you say back in your face and make it all about you. Suddenly, all of it is your fault.
This defensive behavior is a clear signal that this person has a lot of hurt, and is either fearful or unable to work through it. Therefore, if you bring up something that triggers their pain, they immediately see it as a threat. They feel attacked, or that they are being made a scapegoat.
Astrology Forecast January 30 – February 5, 2023
The Gemini Moon will have us very focused on social and intellectual pursuits today and tomorrow, as we search for creative ways to change up our routines and think outside of the box. Gemini lunar energy boosts our curiosity, innovative thinking and the desire for novelty. It is a great time or learning new things, networking, creative ideas and charismatic communication.
Keep your feelings in check around midday today, as the Gemini Moon square Venus in Pisces may pave the way for irritability, emotional outbursts, and arguments. It will especially be the worst possible time to get into a quarrel with your mother-in-law!
This afternoon’s Gemini Moon sextile with Jupiter in Aries will be an ideal time for business opportunities and making money, so make that call or send that marketing email!
If there’s anything you need to get done this week at work or in your business, do it before Wednesday, as things will then slow down significantly for the rest of the work week due to the Moon’s ethereal transit through Cancer. Use the second half of the week instead to reconnect with loved ones and practice some much needed self-care.
The weekend’s Leo Moon will inspire our generosity. Make an effort to unite with others in a common goal of charity and reach out to those in need. Sunday’s Full Moon in Leo will inspire energies of surrender and release, so clear out those closets and get things ready for the donation center, or journal to let go of the past and anything that is holding you back from living in the moment and confidently moving forward.
Hope Is A Spiritual Superpower
My oldest granddaughter told me on New Years’ Eve that one of her favorite things in life is hope. I then asked her what the word really means to her? She explained that it was very comforting to imagine the new year being better than the past year.
She said hope is what motivates her to try new things and be the best she can be. With every bit of motivation there is always an underlying sense of hope. Hope that things will indeed work out for the better and that it is possible to achieve your goals.
I agreed with her that hope gives people the incentive to really go for what they want in life and strive towards goals that they might not otherwise believe possible to achieve. It gives people the courage to take chances in life that may catapult them into a better life.
But I also introduced her the wisdom of Dusty Springfield’s popular song, Wishing and Hoping.
Wishin’ and hopin’ and thinkin’ and prayin’
Plannin’ and dreamin’ each night of his charms
That won’t get you into his arms
So, if you’re lookin’ to find love you can share
All you gotta do is hold him, and kiss him and love him
And show him that you care.
Dusty understood that wishing and hoping is all good and nice – but without real action to set things in motion we may be wishing and hoping for a very, very long time! Don’t get me wrong, hope is a feeling that as a professional psychic medium I want every client to leave my office with in their heart and mind. Knowing that they have much to look forward to and that anything is possible in their life.
Seasonal Crystals To Prepare For The Spring
The second half of the winter season, after the solstice, is an ideal time to establish new patterns and laying the groundwork for the coming spring and summer. Now is the ideal time to start adopting healthier lifestyle habits and plant spiritual seeds that will bloom in the months ahead.
Crystal that pairs well with this kind of winter energy work is clear, transparent quartz. It is a metaphysical staple for many practitioners, regardless the time of year, as it facilitates mental and emotional clarity and helps clear out negative energies. However, like a pristine winter pool of icy water, it also does not tolerate shadows and secrets.
Another winter-friendly crystal is selenite, which resembles an opaque spike of white ice. It acts as a cleanser, sweeping away the painful memories of the past and embracing the transition into a new year. Selenite is also closely associated with guardian angels and spirit guides, so it helps us to tap into their guiding wisdom more clearly.
Warmer, more fiery crystals can also help us generate some sparks and bring new heat to even the coldest, most hibernated of intentions. Citrine, with its inviting citrus hues attracts good luck and prosperity to the bearer. This crystal helps us stick to our goals and fulfill our greater purpose.
If you are wanting to increase your creativity and productivity this year, try fiery carnelian, with its sweltering deep orange and red-brown overtures. Its leading energy associations are inspiration, determination, and tenacity. Also, red or fuchsia garnet (appropriately also the birthstone for January) increases motivation and allows us to manifest our goals and aspirations.
Astrology Forecast January 23 – 29, 2023
After all the cosmic upheaval of last week’s planetary shifts, you may be pleased to know that this week starts out on a much calmer note under a Waxing Crescent Pisces Moon.
A waxing crescent moon phase is a hopeful and positive time to recover, restore and rebuild, and in Pisces this becomes an especially healing energy to release what does not serve us. Fully embrace this harmonious, restorative, liberating vibration today and tomorrow, because on Wednesday the fiery Aries Moon will spur us back into action.
The Aries Moon will offer a great time for the rest of the work week until Friday for brainstorming, making big plans, putting new ideas into action, and energetic negotiation. The Aries Moon conjunction with Jupiter in Aries on Wednesday bodes especially well for potential financial gains, ambitious action, and enhanced social influence. Wednesday morning will therefore be the best time this week for promoting your services, selling your products, and striking those deals!
Venus will be moving into Pisces on Thursday, turning our focus to magic, fantasy, and all things metaphysical. Our intuitions will be on higher alert, and following those random hunches could pay off handsomely over the next four weeks!
The weekend unfolds under a Taurus Moon, where we can choose to tackle the clutter at home, or simply drop on the couch and catch up on all those binge-worthy TV shows we’ve been wanting to stream. Or perhaps a more sensible mixture of both?. Either way, the weekend is for regrouping, restoring, and relaxing, so make the most of the homely vibes of Taurus comfort and security.
Always Regain Your Karmic Composure
When we lose our composure and get very upset or angry, it is never a dealbreaker for spirit. It is only if we completely give up and do not learn from our transgressions that our guides, angels and loved ones in spirit may raise a ‘disapproving brow.’
If we lost your cool or stepped out of line, the key is to seek out the next right thing to do make amends for our messy indiscretions. Maybe it’s picking up a lost piece of mail in the post office parking lot and placing that into the delivery bin, so that it will find its destination. Or maybe it’s feeding the homeless person who is always sitting outside your local store. Or listening with an empathetic ear to a distant relative who has suffered a lot in their life recently.
Even doing an anonymous prayer or sending healing to someone will always be welcome. Whatever your clearance path is, be sure to untie those etheric karmic cords of your recent negative emotional responses and unkind actions, and make things right!
As a spiritually aware person, I will be the first to admit that I too have my ‘moments.’ If one is still dealing with unhealed trauma, shadow work and the clearing certain energy blockages, it is inevitable that frustration, irritation and anger can happen.
Every day, when I do my Epsom salt baths, I make the best attempt I can to clear such emotional energies, but it remains a work in progress. In fact, it seems like the process will never end.