parenting
The Courage To Rescue Your Inner Child
Many people wish they had better memories of their childhood. For some the traumatic experiences of their youth is something they would much rather forget. But spirit has shown me that each piece of our life happens for a reason.
Learning to overcome and rise above the negative events in our life enables us to grow and expand. We do not get to pick and choose the parts we like, and discard the rest in the deepest closet of our mind. We become an empowered, improved version of ourselves when we find healing and forgiveness by redeeming even the worst parts of our life experience.
We all matter. We all bring unique gifts to this world. No matter what has happened to us, we must rescue every lost or damaged moment of our life journey. Those tragic events and awful experiences are what molds us into who we are today and who we are meant to become.
Nobody chooses some the things that might happen to them: family dysfunction, separation, divorce, rivalry, abuse, loss, death. As children we often blame ourselves for the things that happen around us, or we block it out, never wanting to remember it again. But this only means that you have left a part of yourself behind in the darkness of the past. But now that you are older and wiser, wouldn’t it be awesome if you could go back and save that part of you?
As a little girl I loved horses and dogs, but we could not afford to keep any. I made up for it by drawing them. My parents could also not afford to buy me expensive drawing paper, so I had to wait until my mom returned from the grocery store, because I would then get the used brown paper bags to draw on. It may seem somewhat silly, but to this day I still buy lots of paper whenever I get the chance! One would think there was going to be a shortage on paper, based on how I tend to stock up.
The Babysitter’s Near-Death Experience
While I was working out at the gym one day, I saw a little old lady who used to babysit me and my brothers when we were little children. I will never the wonderful times we had with her. She was always making it so much fun. She wasn’t on the phone all the time or watching television. She wasn’t ignoring us kids like so many of the other babysitters my mother sometimes hired for us.
When I spotted her and her daughter in the gym, I walked over to greet her, and told her that I remember her very well. I also thanked her for giving me some wonderful memories and teaching me so many valuable life lessons. The one thing I specifically remember her telling me was to always be careful about what we “put into our minds.”At a young age she had already made me realize that what we think about can either help us or harm us. I have always held on to that wisdom in my life. Because it is truly worth more than gold.
One time, I asked her how she knew so much about things. She looked at me and said,“Moon, you know what, I died once.”
“What? No way!” I responded. I went to catholic school growing up, and near-death experiences were certainly not the kind of thing we were learning about in class.
“Yes, I was in the hospital,” she continued. “I had a major operation and I could not wake up afterwards.” Apparently, she had flatlined during surgery and they had struggled to revive her.
“I am very lucky to be here,” she said and then shared some very interesting things with me about her near-death experience (NDE). I still remember that when she first left her body her parents were both there to meet her and she could hear loved ones on the other side of the tunnel having fun. I also remember she said she felt like a ball of light at the time and that it felt so good. The next moment she was being pulled back into her body. Continue reading
Let Us Make Strong Strides Into The Future
Here in Canada, the days are now getting much longer, the weather is turning warmer, and the trees are in full bloom. Gorgeous flowers are starting to take hold for the summer and the little birds start their incessant chirping at 4 am as the skies start to lighten.
What a beautiful time of celebration this time of the year is, with Pride Month, Father’s Day, and the Summer Solstice all being recognized, among so many other events around the world. It’s also my aunt’s 96th birthday, so that is of itself a reason for our family to rejoice.
Now is a time of nourishment, growth and abundance. Nature gives us so much to see and hear. We are enjoying maximum daylight, as the solstice grows near, surrounding us with warmth and energy. Let’s revel in the beauty that surrounds us, regardless of where we find ourselves or the circumstances we are currently navigating.
We should also take some time to honor those brave leaders of the past and present who have forged paths for others to follow, in spite of insurmountable odds. We can salute them for effecting lasting change and support them in ongoing pursuits for liberty and justice around the world.
The recent celebration of Father’s Day alsoreminded me that we must salute our fathers and forefathers, and those who have become father figures to us. When we think of fathers, we sometimes think of their traditional roles from back in the day as leaders of the family, sole breadwinners, arbiters of sibling arguments, and ultimate disciplinarians. It wasn’t cool for fathers to show emotion or tenderness, far less cry, and, of course, they were always right, even when they were not.
If Bumble Bees Can Fly, So Can We!
When my teenage son was only two years old, he was in the living room one day, jumping from the chair to the couch with a towel wrapped across his shoulders like a cape. He was joyfully singing that he was a superhero and that he could fly. His father looked at him sternly and told him humans cannot fly. I nudged his father, “Don’t tell him that!”
To salvage the situation, I then proceeded to tell my son about bumble bees. I explained that it is aerodynamically impossible for a bumble bee to fly. Their bodies are way too big, and their wings are way too small to carry their little bodies through the air. Yet, they still do manage to fly. This was probably so because their bumble bee ‘mommies and daddies’ never told them they couldn’t! So, bumble bees fly through the air, never knowing that it is by scientific standards technically impossible.
My husband was not impressed. He looked at me and said, ”If next time he jumps off the roof, thinking he can fly, and lands on his head and breaks his neck, I’m holding you personally responsible.” “Point taken,” I said. But it was too late to redact my ‘bumble bee life lesson,’ so I then had to make very sure my son understood that he was never to attempt any flying from high places!
But, it did get me to thinking: how often do we hinder and limit our children? Some of us have psychic children. How many parents are even interested in helping them to develop their abilities? A large part of society is not so open to this.
I wonder what would happen, for example, if I were to tell a psychiatrist that I talk to spirit? He would probably say something like, “It is my observation that you are deluded to the extent that your believe you see and communicate with ghosts. My diagnosis is psychotic disorder.” Then he is likely to put me on some sort of psychiatric medication, or worse have me admitted to a mental health care facility! If I further told the same hypothetical psychiatrist that I entertained the idea of my children also having psychic abilities, he might call child protection services, to have them removed from my care for their own protection. Continue reading
Empowering Life Lessons From My Abusive Father
My father Jim had to grow up quickly in the tough pre-war years. He was the eldest of six children and he did not have an easy childhood, nor tolerant parents.
But life became even more challenging for Jim as he reached adulthood. My parents were married at the age of 21 and had three kids by 23, and another baby at 34.
Jim faced many challenges. As a result, to vent his frustration and process all the stress, he often took it out on those closest to him, namely his wife and children.
Let’s just say my father was not always the ideal husband and parent. It became so bad by the time I was an adult that he would do whatever he could to disrupt my life and my family in any way that you might imagine. The sad part was that he actually wanted to hurt us, as doing so gave him a bizarre sense of satisfaction and control over those closest to him.
I first became fully aware of my father’s desire to disempower his kids when I was about 22 years old. The year was 1982, and jobs were very hard to come by in the United Kingdom in those days. I had an office job but wanted something better. So, I decided to attend school for a year to learn shorthand and typing at the local technical college.
One day, I asked my dad if I could get a ride with him to college, because I had to sit an important exam at 2pm that day. He said I need not worry, as he would drop me off in plenty of time. But then he proceeded to make every excuse not to leave the house!
By quarter to two, I started to panic, as I could not possibly walk or catch a bus from my house to the college with so little time. At ten minutes to two, he finally agreed to take me to sit the exam, but then when we got in the car, he said he needed to go to the garage for gas. I looked at the fuel gauge and saw the car’s tank was full.
I suddenly realized he did not want me to sit the exam, as he did not want me to pass it and better myself and become more independent. Thankfully, his sabotage attempt failed, as I did pass the exam and went on to get a higher paying job.
Take Some Time Out To Embrace The Silence
I see now, more than ever before, parents busying their children with this and that sport, and this and that activity. I sometimes wonder if they ever have time to just be children.
I see how fast time flies these days and I think we actually make it go by even faster by overloading our lives with so much activity. We over commit ourselves way too much. I have been carefully watching my world lately, and I have seen the busy lifestyles of my friends and family. I see how frantic everyone has become. Such a commotion!
I find it disturbing how we over-busy ourselves and our children, and our lives. We really miss out on what I deem as the ‘finer things’. We need to get that connection back. It’s never too late.
We need to take it down a notch. I understand there are things we have to do – go to work, pay the bills, chores to do, people to see. Sure, I get it! But there are those additional things that we sign on to do when we really shouldn’t, or don’t have the time for, and when we do it has a domino effect. Chaos. Anxiety. Stress.
We need time to unwind more, and not just when we give ourselves six or less hours of sleep. We carve time out for our kids and for our friends and family, and often there is really no time left for a few blissful moments of silence. It’s in the silence that we can know ourselves and truly learn to live with a glass half full mentality.
We are filling our days with so much unnecessary activity these days just to keep up with the Joneses. What is wrong with staying home once in a while? I think staying at home is underrated. I don’t know about you, but home is where my yoga mat has its place and I don’t have to pay a gym membership to be active in my own home. It’s also where my library is, and my family, and most of the things I love and enjoy.
Our Deepest Wound Can Become Our Greatest Power
Mercury retrograde thankfully ends today! Astrologers predicted this retrograde would allow us the freedom to purify our lives by releasing people, circumstances, and behaviors that are holding us back or no longer serve us. It certainly kicked up a lot of old wounds and baggage for many of my clients, and also for myself.
This was probably due to a number of reasons, including Uranus and Venus both being retrograde at the same time, and the combination of Mercury retrograde occurring along with a Full Moon in Cancer on January 17th. Many people I did readings for during this astrological period were all dealing with painful memories, unhealed traumas, and intense emotions.
At one point I decided to take a break myself, to create some space and allow my own unresolved emotion to surface. Every time I found becoming unnecessarily defensive, or attempting to place blame on others, I immediately pivoted my attention back to myself and ventured within – to where the origination of this pain truly stemmed from.
I especially found my thoughts were constantly going to my parents and particularly to my mother. My maternal grandmother passed away when my mom was only 13 years old. This has been a recurring theme throughout my life, with me wondering if this had anything to do with my mom always being so hard on me? I, fact, it became the official ‘excuse’ for our difficult relationship.
My recent retrograde self-exploration made me realize that no matter how hard my brain might try to rationalize this old pain, my body still would not accept it. For the first time in all these years, I finally allowed myself to go inside this wound, to examine my inner truth. I had a conversation with this old wound and allowed it to speak to me directly.