pain
Forgiveness Is The Solution
Forgiveness may be the path to a truly happy and fulfilled life. In his book The Forgiveness Solution, Dr. Philip Friedman puts forth the idea that all our emotional concerns, such as judgment, anger, and grievance, come from our inability to forgive. When we hold onto this emotional baggage, it harms everything. Hurt people hurt people. Taken to the extreme, it may lead to self-harm, or harm to others. But there’s a way out of this vicious cycle.
The first and most important step is to learn to forgive ourselves and develop, what Dr. Friedman calls ‘self-regulation skills.’ In essence these skills are defined by the classic Serenity prayer for courage to change what we can, acceptance of what we cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference. In addition, becoming wholly healthy, physically, emotionally, and spiritually, will better allow self-forgiveness.
When we engage in our daily spiritual practice, we should ideally include a mantra about forgiveness. It may take a while for the idea to take root. Habits take about 30 days to become routine, but after you’ve begun to forgive, you can let the pain go by the wayside.
Keeping a positive attitude is essential to the process of forgiveness. This doesn’t mean that you have to be happy all the time. What is does mean is that setbacks and obstacles are regarded as challenges to overcome, rather than insurmountable hurdles.
Healing Your Family Lineage
Have you ever heard a whisper from your ancestors that is clearly guiding you? Sometimes it also comes as a gesture of approval. I have heard my fair share, including one of my dearest family members whispering to me, and calling me by name, as she left her hospital bed at the time of her passing. It was so clear, sacred and spot on! She was letting me know how to deal with issues that would be coming my way after her passing, because she would no longer be there to protect me. And, oh, the validation! It meant so much – far more than my mere words can express. Stemming the flow is indeed observed by our ancestors.
Every lineage has wounds that are passed along throughout generations. The trauma is deeply ingrained in our ancestry. There are no exceptions. Lucky are those of us who have chosen to affect the healing of these imprints. Usually, in a generation, it is the task of the person that is most misunderstood.
If that person is you, it is your sacred task and a path of honor that is earned through hardship on many levels, especially familial relationships. No worries. Your ancestors are guiding you. If you listen closely, you will hear them speak encouragingly. And, be sure to watch for indications of their presence. Indeed, they are witnessing for you.
Remote Healing
After receiving a profound remote healing experience, just a few weeks ago, I now know that distant healing really does work! Successful remote healing sessions have been documented in the past, where the recipient was totally unaware that they were being worked on. But I feel that being receptive to the healing makes a significant contribution to the healing process.
My remote healing was done by a couple who work as a team. Their work has had a profound effect on me. The dynamic healing duo includes an emotional intuitive and a medical intuitive. I never had any pain issues with my hips, but they told me that there was a blockage in my right hip, caused by blocked emotions. To my surprise, the following day, my right hip ached!
The healing team picked up on so much information energetically which they could never have known about me, and in addition to their healing session, they gave me tools to assist in releasing any negative, pent-up emotions, as well as letting go of any people connected to my buried emotional pain. When left unattended, old emotional wounds prevent us from moving forward in joy. Old wounds can go far back to childhood, or even into past lives.
Sometimes The Solution Is Right Before Us
A client recently asked me why ‘bad things’ keep happening in her life. Why does everything seem so hopeless and nothing is fun anymore? She is constantly in pain and there is really no more joy in her life.
The first thing Spirit showed me was a vision of myself when I was in pain, then a flash of me doing Yoga and how I was no longer in pain. For me the key is to not second guess, just to share whatever I get immediately. So, I simply told this women she must start doing Yoga. “Oh my gosh, she said, “I gave up Yoga some time ago and then the pain came back. I never thought of that!”
We have to be proactive and create positive steps in creating positive outcomes. It is simply the Law of Cause and Effect. We get pain relief from doing things that make us feel good and things that are good for us. Spirit says, “If we do nothing to fix something, nothing will get fixed.”
Sometimes in life we are so busy with the drama and chaos that we can’t think with clarity, in order to see what we need to do. Sometimes the solution is right before us, but we don’t realize it, because we are overlooking it. My client said she felt like a blindfold was lifted . Apparently she sees her old Yoga mat in her closet every day, but chose to overlook it. “Not anymore,” she laughed.
Mirror-Touch Synesthesia (MTS)
Science is catching up with the empath, literally. Recently I came across a fascinating book titles Mirror Touch by Dr. Joel Salinas, a Harvard trained researcher and neurologist at Massachusetts General. It explores the phenomenon of Mirror-touch synesthesia (MTS) – a rare neurological trait that causes someone to feel the emotional and physical experiences of other people.
The word synesthesia means joined perception, or to blend the five senses. Science recognizes over 80 types of synesthesia.
Because of Dr. Salinas and other brave professionals, science is sitting up and taking notice and actually exploring the brain and how it functions in individuals with these traits. Dr. Salinas uses his ability of feeling the emotional and physical pain of his patients to treat their symptoms, as if they were his own. The experience for him and others like him is challenging and draining.
The Fallacy Of Future Happiness
One of the most consistent messages that come through when I am doing readings for clients, is the effects of the stories we tell about life and our circumstances. This is the first in a series of two blogs discussing two types of stories that people often tell themselves that have the potential to promote self-sabotage related to nearly every area of life.
We are all storytellers by nature and every experience that we have as human beings is an interpretation of the world around us. We apply labels to the world around us and the circumstances we find ourselves in every day. One of the most damaging stories that we tell ourselves are the future stories of happiness.
Spirit will often give us insights into patterns in our own lives to avoid. A consistent pattern to avoid is the fallacy that something in the future will eventually cause happiness. Happiness simply does not work like that.
Healing Through Radical Self-Forgiveness
There’s no getting around the fact that we’re our own worst critics. There has been much written on the subject of forgiving others, but what about forgiving ourselves? This is the first and most crucial step to real, lasting, healthy self-love.
The roots of the pain many of us feel are guilt and shame – the knowledge that we have wronged or hurt someone else, and the lasting fallout resulting in self-harm. Guilt is sometimes a catalyst to change behavior, but shame often comes with long-term effects, such as negative thinking patterns, self-harming behavior such as addiction, depression or anxiety, and self-sabotage.
Over long periods shame is like a poison in our bloodstream which touches every aspect of our lives. But it doesn’t have to last! There is a healthy way to overcome the legacies of shame and guilt, and it all starts with compassion.