communication
When Your Man Is Not Ready To Commit
I often hear how wonderful the guy is that she is dating… if only he would commit to taking their relationship to the next level!
If a woman is not satisfied with the way things are going and what she is getting from the relationship, should she continue to wait for him?
By patiently waiting for him against your better judgment, he only learns that he can get away with his lack of commitment, especially if he feels comfortable with what he is getting from the relationship. This way a pattern is formed.
So, how do you avoid wasting some of the best years of your life waiting on a guy that is never going to commit?
Well, right from the start you tell him what your looking for and what your expectations are. But handle it carefully, after all you don’t want to scare him away before things even get off the ground!
But do let him know how you feel about dating, long-term relationships, commitment, marriage, children, and whatever else may be important to you.
This will inform him, so that you have a better shot at being on the same page. If he starts to make excuses, or says that he is not interested in a long-term commitment, at least not right now, then accept his words as the truth.
If you are looking for long-term, committed relationship, then spend time with a guys who shares the same values and expectations. Watch his actions – they do speak louder than words! If he is ‘with you’ but continues to live his life like a single guy, that’s a red flag right there. Recognize his actions as a strong indication that he is not really into any relationship and may not be for a long time.
To say that one waits a lifetime for his soulmate to come around is a paradox. People eventually get sick of waiting, take a chance on someone, and by the art of commitment become soulmates, which takes a lifetime to perfect ~ Criss Jami
Always focus on and live your own life, pursuing your own interests. By doing this you will be more attractive to him, because he will see that you have your own friends and activities that you are involved with, which leaves some room for him to also have his own.
Having a healthy balance of time together and time apart, you may also find that his ‘commitment issues’ magically work themselves out. If he is not feeling that he has to give up a lot to be with you and make you happy, he will be more open to taking your relationships to the next level.
Give yourself a reasonable timeframe and stick with it. Life is about living not about waiting. Relationships are about love, never about control. You should not put your life on hold waiting for him to be ready for a commitment. The only time-table is the one that feels right for you, you decide if this is real or not, but it will be on your terms.
Set the standard! Stop expecting others to show you love, acceptance, commitment, & respect when you don’t even show that to yourself ~ Steve Maraboli
Note, this is not handing him an ultimatum. There is no point to that. Pushing for a commitment never works. You cannot make your partner do something if he doesn’t want to do it. And if you could, it will probably be a disaster. I am simply saying that you should be open, honest, and very clear about what your expectations and relationship needs are.
Meanwhile, listen to your gut. You do not want to settle for less than you deserve. If you do, it sends a message to him that you will take what you can get.
A Cuddly Message From Grandma At Halloween
All of us have lost, or will in time lose someone very dear to us. Like it or not, all of us also have to ponder the concept of life after death at some point in our life. Some of us have very strong beliefs on the subject, one way or the other. We either believe in the afterlife, or we do not.
For me the answer is simple and easy. I strongly believe, because of both my personal and professional experiences. For example, I have been visited many times by my grandparents, and I have communicated with many loved ones in spirit in my daily work, when I do readings for my clients.
My grandma often communicates with me in the dream state. She tends to show up when I least expect it, usually to give me a guiding message or to warn me about something. She always has been a worrier, in this life and the next! Right up to the very day she departed this life, she was telling us what to do to keep safe, and she was always giving us good advice. She is very wise.
I was asking her just the other day to give me a sign that she was around, and sure enough, she did. But this time she did not show up in a dream. She spoke to me…through a teddy bear! Yes, indeed.
It is one of those plush toys that makes a cute kissing sound and says, “I love you very much,” when you squeeze it. I was in the tub and this little teddy bear was right next to me, on top of a shelf. After drawing the bath, I was leaning back in the soothing, warm water, letting out a sigh of relief that a long day was over. Next thing you know, this teddy bear goes off on its own, making the kissing sounds and saying I love you, over and over. I knew right away that it was grandma making contact.
Learning To Say Yes To Yourself
It is in the empath’s nature to say ‘yes’ to just about anything requested of them. It goes against our grain. For some of us, saying ‘no’ also brings on fears of rejection, abandonment or letting someone down when it may be important to support them.
Rather than finding an excuse, or simply telling the truth, many of us give in and just go along. It just feels easier in the moment, and even validating or satisfying.
But when you end that phone call, or respond to another text, and you feel anxious and panicked, while you start going over all the other things that will have to fall to the wayside by saying yes, then you really are saying no to yourself.
Self-care requires that we sometimes say no to others, in order to say yes to our own well-being and peace of mind. Consequently, the person that you said yes to won’t be getting the best of you. If you have said yes at your own expense, then what you bring to the table for that person is stress and anxiety. Your best self will not be fully present.
Saying yes, when you really want to say no, can also lead to resentment that you then attach to the person who asked for your assistance.
Here the responsibility lies with ourselves. We teach people how to treat us and many times we don’t give others enough credit for understanding when we say no. Most people would rather hear. “No thanks, that time doesn’t work for me” or “I have other commitments,” instead of having to sense a half-hearted or less than enthusiastic yes.
Communicating With Your Spirit Guides
Each of us has spirit guides that are with us from the moment we are born, right up until we take our final breath. Just as they are named, your spirit guides are here to help guide you through life.
There are spirit guides who are with you for shorter periods of time to help assist you through certain situations, and of course, your closest spirit guides who will accompany you through your entire life.
What differentiates your guardian angels from spirit guides, is that your spirit guides, at some point in history, lived a physical incarnation on Earth and grew enough spiritually to earn the honor of title of being a spirit guide.
They went through very similar issues while here in this world, compared to what you will experience in your own life. This is why they become your spirit guide, devoted specifically to you, and this is what makes the two of you the best team!
Your spirit guides work with you in a variety of ways, therefore you have different spirit guides working in conjunction with certain areas in your life.
In addition to your guardian angels, you have protector guides who give you warning signs when things can be unstable or off in your environment. You also have a doctor teacher, a doctor chemist, joy guides, master guides, inner and outer band guides, as well as ascended masters guides… and that’s just to name a few of them!
Crossing Over Into Unconditional Love
Is my mom okay? Is my dad still in pain? Is my friend trying to speak to me? Is my grandmother proud or ashamed of me? Does my husband forgive me?
These are just a few of the many questions that I am asked by bereaved family members and friend, when they lose someone dear to them.
Firstly, it is important to understand that we are all spirit with a temporary physical body. And we have free will in how we choose to live our lives. Some of us choose to be kind and giving, while some are abusive and filled with anger. It is not our place to judge each other, simply to know that free will was a gift given to us before we came into this current physical body.
When I am asked these questions, the initial part of the answer is always going to be the same. The person that you lost simply left their physical body behind; their spirit never faltered.
When someone crosses over, no matter who, or how, the moment of crossing is always met with pure love. Their angel reaches out a hand and when they touch the light shows them that there is nothing to be afraid of.
They instantly know that the place where they are returning to is a place of light and harmony. It is a place of pure, unconditional love. Hate disappears, hurt or pain disappears. There is no shame, not disrespect. And there is only unconditional love for those that remain here on earth waiting for our turn to join them.
Understanding How Men Fall In Love: Mind, Body & Soul
What makes a man fall in love head-over-heels? When does a guy go from casual interest, to “I want you in my life.” Maybe it’s timing. Maybe he’s been waiting for someone like you. Or maybe you’re way ahead of him.
But from what I’ve seen in thousands of psychic readings over the years, what really flips that switch is chemistry and connection. The way you look into his eyes. The way you listen to him like he’s the only person in the room. How you make him feel, and that sense that, in his arms, you belong.
It is not true that most men are obsessed with looks only. While an attractive appearance certainly helps to get things off the ground initially, this is not what men stick around for in the long term.
Some men are drawn to personality. Some to your kindness and tolerance towards others. Some are drawn to the way you think. Some to the scent of you. Some to that feeling that life without you would be boring. Sound familiar? Yes, the truth is, men and women want a lot of the same things: feeling important, wanted, accepted, appreciated.
A man will bond with you when he feels he can make you happy. When he knows you accept him fully. When he feels seen. Even the parts he hides! Because when he knows that, he gives himself to you: heart, mind, and soul.
There’s another myth that men like sassy women who “play hard to get,” as so often portrayed in Hollywood romcoms. That’s not it at all. What he does like is a woman who is secure in herself, who laughs easily, who keeps her own life going, who has her stuff together (not perfect, just real). And yes, attractive to him. But more than looks…she has backbone, presence, a rhythm of life.
How I Receive Symbolic Messages From Spirit
When I do readings, I use a process whereby I ask Spirit to come forward, with a great deal of protection and guidance, to provide clear, concise and accurate information for the highest good for all concerned.
Spirit always comes through with a great deal of love. They gather to help guide, guard and protect us. They often give us suggestions or recommendations and support us in times of need. However, we all have our own free will, so it is up to us to make the final determination as to whether we will follow their guidance.
There are some things I do not address during a reading. From the very beginning, I have asked my guides not to give me anything to do with health, death or lottery numbers. Therefore, I do not give any medical diagnosis, neither do I foretell someone’s passing, or give out so-called ‘winning numbers.’
Also, if Spirit feels that a particular question is inappropriate, they will not show me anything. Sometimes, they will say specifically that they cannot disclose that particular information.
Spirit uses a combination of direct voice, symbols, and expressions to communicate messages. Symbols are a type of short cut that, over the years, Spirit has developed with me to make certain messages as clear as a bell, without having to go into greater detail.
For example, if Spirit wants me to tell you that someone is very stubborn, they will show me a little cartoon donkey, sitting down on the ground with all four hooves dug into the dirt in front of him. We know that donkeys can be very stubborn and this little guy is not going anywhere. So, in this instance the person you are asking about will be highly resistant to changing their mind in the near future.