choices
Learning To Say Yes To Yourself
It is in the empath’s nature to say ‘yes’ to just about anything requested of them. It goes against our grain. For some of us, saying ‘no’ also brings on fears of rejection, abandonment or letting someone down when it may be important to support them. Rather than finding an excuse, or simply telling the truth, many of us give in and just go along. It just feels easier in the moment, and even validating or satisfying.
But when you end that phone call, or respond to another text, and you feel anxious and panicked, while you start going over all the other things that will have to fall to the wayside by saying yes, then you really are saying no to yourself. Self-care requires that we sometimes say no to others, in order to say yes to our own well-being and peace of mind. Consequently, the person that you said yes to won’t be getting the best of you. If you have said yes at your own expense, then what you bring to the table for that person is stress and anxiety. Your best self will not be fully present.
Saying yes, when you really want to say no, can also lead to resentment that you then attach to the person who asked for your assistance. Here the responsibility lies with ourselves. We teach people how to treat us and many times we don’t give others enough credit for understanding when we say no. Most people would rather hear. “No thanks, that time doesn’t work for me” or “I have other commitments,” instead of having to sense a half-hearted or less than enthusiastic yes.
When Spiritual Leaders Let Us Down
It is a hard lesson for some of us to learn that people are just people. We are all capable of good and evil. The difference is the choices that are made on how to handle our emotions and feelings.
When you put faith and trust in an individual and are let down, you start to second guess your decisions and lose some faith in yourself to make wise decisions. It can leave a big hole in your heart and create trust issues in the future.
It seems impossible for a person who has done remarkable good deeds to also choose to do bad things. We must realize that all people have temptations in life. Some people can avoid the albatross on their back, while others simply cannot. It takes a very strong person to walk their talk.
The same applies to ‘highly spiritual’ people, because some healers, gurus and spiritual leaders certainly have had their own cross to bear.
A Few Minutes Of Daily Self-Care
I often tell my students to take some ‘me time’ each day, even if it’s only five minutes for self-care. And I have heard 101 excuses as to why someone cannot do this, ranging from parenting responsibilities and career, to house cleaning and maintenance. These excuses typically start with the words, “I have to…”
At one workshop, I had several people offer their excuses for not having even a few minutes for themselves on a daily basis. Then I narrowed it down to a simple question. When you have to go to the washroom, do you hold it in all day long, and all night, because you ‘have to’ do something else? After the laughter stopped, because I did do an exaggerated imitation of someone ‘holding it’ by rolling on the floor in agony!
And then I asked the next question. By holding it all day and night, and writhing in pain and agony, what did I accomplish? How much time did I waste focusing on this issue of ‘I have to go,’ but ‘I don’t have time.’
This is the simplest way to explain time management versus wasted energy and time. I take a bath or shower each day, as do most people. I am usually at least a few minutes under the water in some way. Water is my peacemaker and my calming force. It energizes me and charges me for the day.
Your Sacred Center Of Self-Love
We all thrive on being loved. This is natural, of course, if you look back at humanity in history on an evolutionary level. Ancient people came together in tribes, families, and groups, to cultivate a place of safety, security, nurturance, and love. If you were different or stood out in any way, or even left the tribe, you were literally putting your own life at risk. This topic can be viewed from so many arenas, including psychological, spiritual, scientific, and psychic.
I often wonder how and when did we start defining ourselves by how others felt about us, and why did we believe that other’s thoughts about us were true? At what point in time did we allow others to define us? It’s as though we as humanity went into a deep trance.
We all know the phrase, “Love thyself first”. When did we forget this vital piece of information? There are many ways we can come back in touch with this essential truth, but for the most part, our society does not support a lifestyle that would naturally lead us back to our sacred center of self-love. How often do you take a moment to look in the mirror, or tell yourself, “I love you?” Most of us feel silly doing this, but it is very healing.
Learning To Pray With Archangel Selaphiel
Archangel Selaphiel, also known as Zerachiel, is a motivating and compassionate angel who assists us in the very act of praying. In fact, his name actually means “one who prays to God” or “the prayer of God”. He teaches us the importance of prayer, because it helps us to vent our feelings appropriately to God.
Furthermore, Selaphiel can assist us in the process of prayer by helping to block out any unnecessary distractions, so that we can fully concentrate on our prayers, and most importantly, recognize what the Almighty has to say when he answers.
Selaphiel’s angelic duties do not stop there. In Astrology he is referred to as “The Angel of The Sun”, since he works in conjunction with Archangel Jehudiel to control all planetary movements. He is also believed to assist people in the interpretation and understanding of their dreams, as well as help those who struggle with addiction. He also protects the younger generation, and is both the overseer of earthly exorcisms and the ruler of heavenly music.
The Soul Self In The Age Of Technology
I used to work as a realtor for a short period of time. Most likely the short duration of that career was, even though I absolutely love people, that I sucked at the selling part.
As part of that chosen career path, I felt compelled to purchase and carry a cell phone. Customers looking for a salesperson usually will not wait long and will often just move on to the next available agent – hence the need for a phone that I had to carry with me constantly.
When I was out visiting family or friends, I had to explain immediately why I was carrying this device and my need to answer it quickly, so that I didn’t lose a potential sale. Everyone seemed to understand the situation.
If my phone rang and it was only someone wanting to chat or another type of call, I simply explained to whomever was on the other end that I was thus engaged and would call them back. However, this did not always go over well! People who call someone sometimes feel their call must be taken and followed through with a conversation.
Divine Timing And Patience
One of the spiritual messages I receive quite often is that everything comes in Divine timing and more patience is required. It is difficult for many of my clients to digest this, as there is typically no specific date provided with this kind of message.
Sometimes Divine timing is due to our guides and angels feeling that we are not ready yet. Other time there may be blockage that has to be removed, or another reason why things are being held up. When it is in regards to a relationship with another person, it may not be that person’s time to be in your life. While you may be ready, something may have to happen to free them up.
As difficult as it seems, if you wait patiently and do not allow yourself to become frustrated, things eventually will shift. Things will start to happen at a quicker rate. If you carry negativity, frustration, anger, baggage of the past, it creates additional resistance and nothing can move forward. Often we are creating the walls and barriers that prevent the good from coming in ourselves!