personal growth
Birth Order And The Empath
Most of us are familiar with the notion that the personality traits of the firstborn are typically different from the middle sibling, or the youngest child in the family, and so on. But many empaths do not realize how they may be impacted by their birth order in the family.
In The Birth Order Book, author Kevin Lemar gives a detailed outline of these so-called ‘birth order’ characteristics and qualities.
Firstborns, as well as only children, for example, are often associated with leadership attributes and stronger personalities, along with being more protective, fearless, and reliable than their siblings. However, the firstborn may also exhibit some less desirable traits, such as being controlling, bossy and impatient.
The middle-born tend to be social butterflies and peacekeepers, who are focused on fairness and keeping everyone happy. The youngest-born tend to be fun-loving, outgoing, creative, free spirited and can be adept at manipulating others to do things for them.
Only children tend to be mature for their age, perfectionistic and conscientious, but may feel the burden of high parental expectations.
The Firstborn Empath
My experience with empaths has been that the firstborn and only child empaths are indeed more protective, fearless, independent, reliable, but in the empath these protective instincts are magnified tenfold.
They also tend to feel it is their responsibility to solve every human problem and protect everyone around them, regardless. I often see a very enhanced sense of responsibility.
The Self-Healing Miracle Of Letting Go
In the mid-90s, I had the opportunity to attend The Sedona Method Technique Teacher Training course in Arizona. The experience pierced the core of my being and changed my life forever.
Initially, I was reluctant to go, because I was living in Michigan at the time with my husband and two young daughters. My youngest was around a year old and our older daughter was only five. We had not been living in Michigan very long as we had only recently moved there, and I was terribly worried about leaving them for two weeks!
Nevertheless, I convinced myself to go, because my husband had gone to a previous workshop and raved about how it transformed his life. I sensed it would be good tool to incorporate into my psychic readings and metaphysical work.
When I arrived at the workshop there were attendees from all over the world, including psychiatrists, psychologists, and even scientists. To be honest, I felt a little awkward being thrown in with a bunch of ‘genius nerds’ with various fancy post-graduate degrees. It was a bit intimidating to feel that many of them probably had a much better understanding and formal education on human behavior than I did. However, that did not prevent me from also learning this wonderful technique.
The Sedona Method is based on the concept of Emotional Intelligence (EQ). It is different from intellectual intelligence, because it refers to our ability to recognize and regulate our own emotions, and how skilled we are at using social awareness to find solutions to daily challenges and life problems.
The Sedona Method therefore teaches one how to improve your EQ. In the same way we can go to the gym to strengthen a muscle, or do brain training puzzles to improve our memory, we can also train and develop our emotional intelligence.
Our natural impulse when something makes us sad, angry, or fearful, is to resist and fight back, or shut down emotionally to it. Emotional intelligence requires that we take a step back, take a breath, and release the urge to go with a kneejerk reaction of firing back or shutting down.
Your Beliefs Shape Your Reality
In metaphysics and alternative spirituality the idea that our belief or faith shapes our reality is a well-known concept. This notion is found again and again in sacred texts, ancient religions, and wisdom traditions.
In The Bible, for example, Jesus says, “With a mustard seed of faith you can move a mountain,” and the Buddha says, “The mind is everything, what we think we become.” These are just two examples among many others.
What is a belief? It is simply a thought that we choose to think again and again. Faith is when a belief becomes established as a pattern.
The mind, our consciousness, is where belief occurs. Whatever we choose to believe about ourselves, and about life, becomes true for us. The thoughts we hold in our mind shapes our reality.
‘Old school’ belief and faith is however a little different and maybe less trendy than the modern idea of the Law of Attraction and our ability to ‘manifest,’ that has become so popular in recent years in spiritual circles and the metaphysical community. Yet, it it is still an important spiritual principle.
Our beliefs and biases work as a filter within the brain to organize our experiences to confirm a belief or bias. For example, if someone has a belief that their partner is aloof, or not present in the relationship, their brain will filter out those experiences where their partner is actually active and present in the relationship.
In this way the brain confirms its own biases. Even if their partner is present, caring, kind and open to communication, their chosen belief will overshadow their reality. Continue reading
Can Anyone Read The Tarot?
During this past week alone, several people from different walks of life have asked me this very question. Yes, anyone can learn, but as some of my Tarot students have shown, it’s the passion you have for Tarot that makes the difference, and that can turn someone into a reader with a difference.
Tarot readings can be used for one’s personal growth only, or for doing readings for self and others. Often individuals learn the Tarot of their own volition, paying particular attention to its imagery and symbolism, as they develop their skill with practice, practice, and more practice.
Once they feel they can trust their higher self and their spirit guides, and feel they are being directed to the symbols and imagery in Tarot, which will kick start the required information to be revealed, they will be confident to do Tarot readings.
A good teacher or mentor will always encourage a student to be guided by the way the Tarot talks to them, and not just by learning ‘parrot fashion’ the many meanings each card may have.
It is the language of symbols which helps us more easily tune into the unconscious mind, especially when there is not always time available to spend many hours doing psychic development, and going within and meditating before a reading.
Many Tarot readers work with various spreads, or layouts, to help them answer specific questions and to define events, timing, important influences and important people in the questioner’s life. Tarot helps us find clarity as to the direction in which we are headed and even helps identify blocks which may lie ahead.
I have in my collection at least fifteen Tarot decks, but one or two would suffice for most people. I just love the way talented people have been able to bring Tarot to life in their own Tarot deck design, using their own imagery, shapes and color.
Strategies For Manifesting A Successful Relationship
Over the years I have worked with many clients who either want to improve an existing relationship or manifest a new relationship. In these readings, spirit consistently suggests three simple spiritual practices that can radically change our relationships and romantic energy.
We tend to get stuck by over-analyzing and over-thinking our love lives, to the extent that we develop a lot of emotional charge and resistance in relationship matters. With the guidance of spirit, I have found these three simple strategies to be very helpful in moving our love energy in a more healthy and happy direction, in a very short time. Try these strategies in your daily spiritual practice. It could help you finally step into the love life of your dreams!
Dreamwork
Begin your relationship work in the dream state. Before going to bed each night, ask your angels, guides and higher self to invite your current love partner, new love interest or a future partner to join you for an ‘astral date.’ I like to think of it as ‘etheric couples counseling’ on the astral plane.
Meeting your lover in your dreams can ignite a significant energy shift in your relationship life, which will eventually translate into the emotional, mental and physical realms. In this altered state of consciousness the higher selves of you and your partner do the work with the support of spirit. The limitations, judgments and preconceptions of your ego or ‘lower self’ are all deactivated while you are asleep and in the dream state, and therefore unable to interrupt or interfere with the process.
Harmony In Your Relationship
How does one achieve true harmony in a relationship? This is probably the most elusive aspect in most relationships these days. Sadly, a happy and healthy relationship cannot be achieved without it also being a harmonious relationship!
To achieve harmony in any relationship, we need to address the following two aspects with honesty and courage.
Firstly, what do you require from the relationship? Are your needs being met, or is the relationship all about them? Too often people settle for a bad relationship instead seeking to fulfill their own wants and needs.
Remember, you matter. You must also be your priority, not just your partner. Your wants and needs are a priority. If you put your needs aside and put everyone before yourself, you will never find harmony or joy in your relationships.
Make a list of your top ten wants or needs. Then make a list of your top five deal-breakers. What will you not tolerate or settle for? Once you have clarity on what you need and expect, you can more easily figure out what to do about it.
A healthy relationship goes both ways, with comprise. Do your best to see that you stay true to your wants and needs. Too many people settle, because they either think they cannot find someone better, or they are scared to move forward on their own. But we must be brave to achieve what we desire in life.
Tell yourself that you deserve to be happy and that you are going to find it. You deserve it! You are worth it! If you put all of that out to the Universe and believe it, it will happen for you when the time is right. Belief is key. If you believe it, you will achieve it.