healing
Making A Meaningful Change
Most of us have been struggling with stress, anxiety and depression over the past two years. Whatever your personal struggles are, they are real and valid. The pandemic has been affecting everyone differently.
It is important to acknowledge your feelings and deal with it. Ignoring your struggles will only allow it to become bigger issues. Stress and trauma takes its toll on all of us, especially if left unattended. The best thing you can do for yourself and the people around you is to process it and work towards healing.
It is also vital to understand that your joy and happiness is not dependent on other people, material things, or external circumstances. It can only be found within yourself. And often the only way to access this happiness and joy within is to make some real, meaningful changes in your life.
Many people never find their joy and happiness, because they do not know what brings them joy and makes them truly happy. This is the big question. Look within and find makes you happiest. Then concentrate on that. Make a plan and start working towards it. It may sound simplistic, but it will soon begin to manifest in your life if you believe it.
For example, if you want to be in a happy, healthy relationship and you are tired of the bad relationship you are currently in, decide to make the change. Simply choose to be happy. You deserve to be happy and to be loved. Decide that you want to make it happen. It really is as simple as that.
How To Heal Your Broken Heart
In the 1960’s Roy Orbison belted out the song, It’s Over. Even at four years of age, it stirred my emotions hearing it on the radio. In 1984, I heard the exact same words from a man I very much loved and believed to be ‘the one.’ Thankfully, he was not, but that is another story.
He turned to me and said, “We’re not a good match.”
I remember that moment as if it were yesterday. My heart jumped and my knees turned to jelly. I felt so lost and alone, as well as almost every other negative emotion possible…from anger and hurt, to frustration and hopelessness. All these emotions coursed through my body like a freight train.
How was I going to cope without him in my life? What will become of me? What do I do now that it is over?
At 24 years of age, I did not have much experience dealing with loss, disappointment, and grief as I do today. Today, as a practicing psychic with many years of professional experience, I would offer my younger self the following spiritual advice regarding healing a broken heart.
Acknowledge
I believe we can also mourn the living, just as much as we grieve for someone who has passed away. Indeed, acknowledging finality, in whatever form the finality presents itself, can be a challenging thing to do, especially if you are emotionally involved with someone. That said, it is much better than holding onto false hope, which is far worse. Continue reading
Transitioning With Grace
Autumn always awakens my awareness of transitions. Not only does the entire scenery change color, but each individual leaf on every tree is in a constant shift of shades of greens, golds, yellows, oranges, and reds. With every shifting shade and combination of them, the pattern of the palette continuously alters too.
Then, of course, there is the falling of the leaves – the gradual transition from tree to ground, from full foliage to bareness in various new measures day by day. The rise and set of the sun, and the length of the night and light incrementally inch through their own thresholds as well.
Like the changing season, life is full of transitions. From the moment the soul enters the womb, an endless sequence of them begins. The body develops in a rapid succession of changes, then carries the soul from womb to world.
In the world, the embodied soul then undergoes transition through various ages and stages, growing from infant to toddler to child to adolescent to adult, until gradually winding down to leave the body behind and proceed to the next one or world.
In between, you and I – the embodied souls – may face a multitude of additional transitions in relationships, careers, residences, levels of consciousness, and more. Such transitions – even the best of them – are not easy. They naturally incorporate intervals of instability in the liminal spaces between here and there. Transitions entail shedding, releasing, letting go of the old that was, and then birthing and rebirthing the next and new phase that will be. They empty us out and fill us up, again and again. Transitions are not easy; they may even make us feel queasy!
So, how can we move through the endless array of life’s transitions gracefully? As with all things, there are probably as many ways as there is individuality among people. What I share are simply some of the ones I have found especially helpful.
The Wisdom Of The Trees
The annual seasons profoundly affect perennial trees. Each year many species of perennial change color, release their leaves, go dormant, and then come back to life in the spring with new growth.
As humans we could learn a lot from these trees. Firstly, they are naturally in tune with the seasons. They can ebb and flow with the natural order of things. For a season their leaves will gather up energy from the sun for growth. They bask in the light and find nourishment. And they can do this because of their ability to release the old when the time comes.
There are times in our lives when we also need to release the old things from the past. All our life experiences have natural course and expiry date to them. All our relationships in this physical life are also temporary experiences. Knowing this allows us to be in the flow with the cycles of life and the afterlife.
Too often we resolutely cling to the past, which causes us to feel stuck or keeps us from developing the types of relationships and experiences we truly want. If the trees were to hold on to their old dead leaves, there would be no room nor energy for further growth. It would be impossible for them to thrive and be nourished by the sun.
There is also no way for trees to perpetually grow. One time I planted a tree late in the season. I gave it lots of nourishment, but over the winter it died off. By fertilizing the tree, I was creating a condition that would not allow it to survive. The fall is when trees release their leaves so the wood can harden off.
Too often people want to run to the next experience, and the next experience. Or they they try to make an experience last indefinitely. They want to make the ‘summer’ of their peak human experiences last forever. They never give themselves the opportunity to let go and properly grieve what has been, in order to recenter and become stable and energized for the next spring.
It is important for us to acknowledge our actual life experiences and move through the winter seasons in a way that prepares us for the next season. There is a temptation to just keep running to the next experience or next relationship to satiate a previous painful experience. However, in doing so we create situations that are toxic and unsustainable.
The Powerful Practice Of Eye Gazing
Eye gazing, also known as ‘soul gazing,’ is a powerful meditative practice that can be done on your own, or with a partner. Eye gazing is an ancient tantric practice of looking deeply into someone’s eyes to foster a spiritual connection.
Eye gazing is a potent means of connecting with yourself and others to build genuine connection in your life. It is also an exciting way to build meaningful intimacy with a romantic partner. If you have trouble opening up to others, eye gazing can be an effective tool to help you get comfortable and confront any fears you may have around being seen. It can be done alone, with a friend, or with a romantic partner.
It is also a powerful tool for discovering how past lives may be helping or hindering you in your current incarnation, and for receiving messages directly from Spirit. It can be used as a method for communication with your guides and higher self.
Anyone can eye gaze, and I feel everyone should try it at least once! Whether you do it alone or with a partner, eye gazing can offer some profound insight and create potent shifts in our perspective that allow you to break limiting patterns in your life.
Eye gazing requires no special equipment or paraphernalia to set the mood, although it can be pleasant to light some incense or candles if desired. You can also use music but ensure that it is meditative, gentle, instrumental music without lyrics that will not distract you. The only thing you really need is a timer, as well as a partner, or mirror if you are gazing by yourself.
Typically, I encourage people to start gazing for just a few minutes at a time, but as you become more comfortable you can certainly increase the length of your gazes.
Small Steps To Big Changes
Making positive changes in your life can often feel like an insurmountable task. At times it can be so daunting that it might even seem easier to just have things stay the same, no matter how uncomfortable it has become.
This is especially true when we have been working on the same aspect of our life for years and still not seeing the results we were hoping for, whether the issue is weight loss, finances, health and wellness, family, career, or relationship.
For me the challenge was a particularly frustrating relationship situation. I felt that no matter what I did, no matter how hard I tried to grow and move forward, I always got sucked back into the drama and negativity.
I continually called on my angels and spirit guides to help me improve the relationship, to heal our issues, release our karma, and so forth. I tried anything and everything I could think of to achieve some of the harmony and peace I so much desired in my life.
This went on for years, and I was ready to throw in the towel and just accept that this one area of my life would always be out of balance. But as soon as I let go, I received the most amazing piece of information from my guides!
They showed me how I was focusing too much on the big picture, or the end result. I also realized that because everything wasn’t miraculously healed over night, I was becoming frustrated and disregarding all the tiny steps and improvements I had been making in repairing the relationship.
My guides further told me to break the steps in the healing and reconciliation process down into smaller parts. Instead of seeking instant and complete resolution, I should be working towards small daily improvements. If I do this consistently, I will soon reach the end goal.
The Healing Power Of Positive Self-Talk
Most people indulge more in negative self-talk, than positive. But self-talk is not supposed to be negative and overly critical. We are supposed to use it to encourage, empower and motivate ourselves to achieve success and follow our dreams.
Our brain has the conscious mind, the subconscious mind, and what is known in hypnosis as the critical factor of mind. This critical factor is that part of our consciousness that checks and filters every through and idea that enters our mind. It is like the gatekeeper or the guardian between the conscious mind and the subconscious. That is how hypnosis works – it is a way to bypass the critical factor so that we can access the subconscious and reprogram it with new information and insights for healing and self-empowerment.
The role of the critical factor is to protect our mind, but this is not always a good thing. Because of the job the critical mind is tasked to do, it tends to be critical of everything. It is unfortunately also that part of our brain that says we are not worthy or deserving, that we cannot do things, or achieve things.
I cannot get the job I really want.
I’m not worthy of a happy, healthy relationship.
I am not smart and pretty enough.
People just don’t like me.
Why do bad things always happen to me?
The one big problem with the critical factor is that it does not always see or hear things the way they really are. It can convince of things that are not true at all. For example, it may you that others are trying to get you fired from a job, when in fact the boss is trying to help you keep your job.