change
No More Procrastination
Do you also procrastinate? Procrastination is the avoidance of doing a task that needs to be accomplished by a certain deadline. Or do you sometimes intentionally delay the completion of a task, despite knowing it might have negative consequences? Ninety five percent of people procrastinate at some point in life.
To break the habit of procrastination we must find some self-compassion when a task at hand causes us stress just thinking about tackling it. Some tasks just seem too big or overwhelming, and we can’t seem to motivate ourselves to get it done.
Procrastination makes most people feel guilt and shame. For some extreme procrastinators, negative feelings may trigger another reason not to complete a task. Only to become a vicious cycle of self-defeat. Most procrastinators tend to put off endings, as well as beginnings and commitments.
I have a close friend that has all kinds of ideas for a book she is writing. While collecting material, she put of starting the actual writing for three years. She felt she needed several points of view about the subject matter. She always needed one more.
Now, 13 years later, she can’t seem to stop writing the same book. The idea of being an author just feels so good to her now. The added benefit of this is that whenever she is asked what she has been up to, she loves to say, “I’m writing a book.”.
Are We There Yet?
Are we there yet? It’s okay to ask. The answer, however, should always be no. If we become preoccupied with destination, we lose sight of the joy and purpose of the journey in the first place. When we honor the journey, we are able to keep on the path of forward motion.
Life itself is the journey. We learn the hard lessons, and finally understand that it’s a never-ending process. Often things occur in the guise of mistakes, failures, misunderstandings, hurts. But in truth, not learning from these events is the only failure. And if you don’t learn it the first time, it is highly likely the lesson will repeat itself, over and over again, until you actually do learn it.
When our behavior and actions change, we convert what we have learned into wisdom. For some people the process is a lifelong quest, while others utilize what they have learned and it moves them along quickly. Some people need to go deeper within themselves to make progress.
It is always good to ask if we are there yet. Especially at the beginning of every journey, or when the learned lessons tell us there is more work to be done – inner work to get to the very core of our being. For some people inner work can be very frightening, as many of us deeply suppress the things that we don’t want to deal with. But to complete the journey we must peel away the layers, like peeling an onion.
Love Yourself, And Don’t Stop Believing
Recently, I had time to reflect on different aspects of my own life and where it was, or wasn’t going. I was starting to feel self-pity creeping up on me, and had to act to shift my energy out of that negative space, as it would trickle off into other areas of my life.
I was supposed to attend a celebration with family on a Wednesday, as well as a gathering with another group of relatives on the following Saturday. But I wasn’t prioritizing my own needs and well-being, and the Universe decided to put an end to my plans.
To cut a long story short, on the Wednesday, instead of going to the party, I landed in the local hospital emergency room, as my knee gave out and I could not walk. The Universe was telling me to rest – to sit down and get my priorities back in order.
My priorities have always been my children and grandchildren, and that hasn’t changed. However, my views on the recurring family drama, with regards who can go see who, and when, and where, and how, has significantly changed. I have decided to let go of always trying to keep the peace, and please everyone. I no longer wish to expose myself to the unnecessary stress and commotion of it all.
I let it go by simply asking my angels to deal on my behalf with all the stuff that I could no longer hold inside and carry, and take it off my shoulders. And yes, it took me a couple days to realize what was needed, but as soon as I did this, the need for walking with a cane started to disappear and the pain and swelling in my knee has been minimal the last couple of days.
When We Fear The Turning Of The Tide
At this time in our world each person must examine their own thoughts and feelings on important issues. You might ask, “What does it matter what I think or feel? I am only one person nobody cares about my opinion!” Well, if everyone felt their voice did not matter, we would never create any change in our world.
It can be very difficult to find your own voice sometimes. To find your voice is to go within and discover your own truth. Each of us have a unique view of the world we live in.
It can be very challenging to speak your mind, especially is a group situation where others think differently. We often remain silent, because we fear rejection if we should stand alone in our beliefs and opinions.
The opinions of others can make us question our own judgment and shake our confidence. We become self-critical. Feelings of fear arise in us. We doubt our ability to express ourselves in a way that others will respect and understand.
The opposite is true also. When things are going along just fine in our personal world, it is often hard to realize and understand that not all people think and feel they way we do. People tend to associate for the most part with others that think and feel the same way.
It is easy to get comfortable in our own world, and avoid what is going on around us. But some point we will have no choice but to pull our head out of the sand. Even if we don’t realize it, the energy of a changing tide does affect all of us.
Are You Living An Unexamined Life?
According to Socrates, “The unexamined life is not worth living.” This statement is very powerful, yet it has a very simple meaning. What you do not change, does not change you. When your actions remain the same, so do the results. If you cannot examine the things that are eating at you, the things that have gone wrong in your life, and even the things that have gone right, nothing changes.
We must look at our life and go behind the mask that we may be wearing, to cover up the fact that we are vulnerable inside. There are often so many aspects to our life that requires change in order to move forward to a better place.
For example, are you repeatedly settling for the same type of person as a partner and find it constantly failing? Are you going to a dead-end job day in and day out, that you hate so much that merely entering the workspace already makes you despise the day before it even starts? Do you look in the mirror and see things about yourself that makes you miserable?
Take off the mask of pretension and make an effort to change what isn’t working. Examine why you keep repeating the same patterns.
If you are ending up with the same type of person every time, ask yourself why? Are you trying to meet someone in the same way? Are you settling for someone that is not all that you would like, but feel it’s better than to have no one at all? Are you compromising on what you want? If they are not what you seek, cut them loose. They are not going to suddenly change.