self-acceptance
Loving Yourself Unconditionally
The first person any of us learns to love is our self. And that’s how it should be, even if many of us forget how to do that somewhere along the way.
We live in a culture which is often harsh, judgmental, and narrow-minded, causing many of us to stop loving ourselves. Everyone has had a time when they felt “less than”, or imperfect. This becomes a snowball effect where we gradually put ourselves down all the time. But it doesn’t have to be this way.
How can we expect to show love for anyone else if we do not first love ourselves? So many of us think of love as an abstract “thing.” Love is not a thing; it’s an action. We need to make it a part of our conscious thought. Unconditional love of self is the basis of all healthy relationships. Continue reading
Be Kind To Yourself And Others
The nightmare continues every day. The very thing we fear the most has come to look us right in the face, staring in our eyes. We are at a turning point. We can give up, turn run for the hills, to hide, but still there is the demon of fear lingering around the deep recesses of our mind.
This little imp taps us on the shoulder, reminding us of all the stupid things we did, all the hurtful things, how we messed up, time after time. Surely this little devil of fear tells us we can see how we don’t deserve to reach our dreams, or accomplish our goals. We messed up time again, no one agrees with us, we are reminded that “they” are so much smarter, did things exactly right every time.
Stand back! Truly look at everything from all sides. Become like an eagle, or an owl, or a hawk, with eyes that see far beyond the surface where the heart lies. Continue reading
Begin By Loving Yourself Unconditionally
The first person any of us learns to love is ourself. And that’s how it should be, even if many of us forget how to do that somewhere along the way. Yet, how can we expect to show love for anyone else if we do not first love ourselves?
So many of us think of love as an abstract “thing.” Love is not a thing; it’s an action! We need to make it a part of our conscious thought.
Also, we live in a culture which is harsh, judgmental, and narrow-minded, which causes so many of us to stop loving ourselves. Everyone has had a time when he or she felt less than, or imperfect. This becomes a snowball effect where we gradually put ourselves down all the time. But it doesn’t have to be this way, and unconditional love of self is the basis of all healthy relationships. Continue reading
Embrace Who You Are
We all came to this planet with our own unique gifts. Just like no one on the planet has the same fingerprint as you, they also do not have the same talent, voice or look. Sure, some may come close, but the entirety of a person, their personality and so on, is completely different from one to the other.
I feel saddened when I see young people copying one another. Why they do this is uncertain to me, however I’m sure they want to fit in or be accepted, and they fear being rejected by their peers. There are also adults who do this. I asked one girl who was mimicking her friend recently, why would you want to be a photo copy of someone else? You’re beautiful and you have a lovely voice, and you are a very talented artist. She looked at me and said: “Oh my goodness, you’re so right!” I told her that each person came to this planet to share their light in their own unique way, no matter what your personal qualities and talents may be. Continue reading
The Powerful Magic Of Being Authentic
If anyone were to ask me what the highlight of my life has been thus far, I would not even need a nanosecond to think about it. It is the easiest question I could ever answer. The most profound moment for me simply was the day I discovered the true power of authenticity. It was the day I discovered me.
Since that day, the quest for authenticity has completely altered my life. Like a Columbus of the heart, mind and soul I have hurled myself off the shores of my own fears and limiting beliefs, to venture far out into the uncharted territories of my inner truth in search of what it means to be genuine and at peace with who I really am. I have been abandoning the masquerade of living up to the expectations of others and have been exploring the new horizons of what it means to be truly and completely me, in all my amazing imperfection and most splendid insecurity. Continue reading
Letter To My Daughter
This is a letter to my daughter – if I had one, that is. But I don’t. So, this letter is to her, the daughter I might have had, and also to those young ladies I have known over the years who I have felt were like daughters to me.
My daughter’s name would have been Chantal-Marie, should she have been born. I suppose I could have had her, but life took its course and time slipped away. I was too busy mothering myself, I think, and I couldn’t have mothered her, in retrospect. But hindsight isn’t always 20:20 – don’t let anyone fool you.
So here goes. Strangely enough, I feel as though I were on the edge of a precipice as I write this. It is a most unexpected feeling. Continue reading
The Gift Of Traumatic Life Experiences
It never ceases to amaze me how much I learn from clients every day. More and more clients also show me how they have found ‘the gift’ in their own personal challenges and heartbreak.
One of my clients had a very abusive childhood, and two subsequent abusive marriages. She told me recently how she wrote each of her ex-husbands a detailed letter. She thanked them for the gift they had given her; the growth she had experienced from the myriad of ‘not so happy experiences’ during her life journey with them. Was she playing the victim or merely expressing her anger to them? No, she absolutely meant it.
She also talked about more recent failed relationships and the many gifts derived from knowing deep rejection all the way through to sabotage. And now, finally, she has met a guy who appears to be her ideal mate – she is ready to surrender and enjoy the experience, wherever it takes her. Now she can enjoy the gift of shared love. Continue reading