Letter To My Daughter

This is a letter to my daughter – if I had one, that is. But I don’t. So, this letter is to her, the daughter I might have had, and also to those young ladies I have known over the years who I have felt were like daughters to me.

My daughter’s name would have been Chantal-Marie, should she have been born. I suppose I could have had her, but life took its course and time slipped away. I was too busy mothering myself, I think, and I couldn’t have mothered her, in retrospect. But hindsight isn’t always 20:20 – don’t let anyone fool you.

So here goes. Strangely enough, I feel as though I were on the edge of a precipice as I write this. It is a most unexpected feeling.

Having a little girl has been like following an old treasure map with the important paths torn away ~ Heather Gudenkauf

Dear Chantal-Marie.

You are enough. Only you can be you, so why be jealous of anyone else? That diminishes your own inner light, my daughter.

Sometimes you can only do what you can do, and that too is enough. Sometimes, daughter of mine, trying is just that…trying…trying endlessly. Stop trying and just be, and you’ll be all the better for having done so.

You make me crazy sometimes, my child. I watch as you do things that you know not what you do. I can only stand by and watch as you go and scrape your knee (or your car… or your heart) and wait patiently in case you need a bandage or a hug. Look before you leap, but don’t be afraid to take a chance.

A real man, or a real woman for that matter, depending on whom you choose to love, will always accept you for who you are, and would want to make you a better you. Your challenge is to allow them to love you.

Be kind to people and to animals, my daughter, and always show respect.

Even if you don’t agree, there isn’t always a need to shout it from the rooftops. You don’t have to show up for every argument thrown your way. Sometimes you can choose to opt out. In fact, sometimes you can just choose. Period. And always remember what a gift it is to have a choice, because so many women in this world do not have that same freedom.

Last, but not least, learn to cook. Always floss your teeth, but never floss your attitude. No one likes a know-it-all. And always use a spell-checker and proofread what you write – that way you know you got your point across.

I love you, daughter of my heart and mind, if not daughter of my body. You make me proud just by having known the mere thought of you.