Love & Relationships
Is Your ‘Soulmate’ A Narcissistic Predator?
He must be your soulmate, or twin flame, because he knows you so well. He has taught you so many things about yourself. Surely, this means he is ‘the one.’ I don’t think so. You might want to say something like this regarding your therapist, teacher or healer, but even then I would still be careful.
If you are constantly looking for someone to ‘get’ you, or yearning to be understood on a ‘deeper level,’ you might as well have a target on your back that says: prey. If you are so wounded and empty that you need to be constantly affirmed by another, then you need some serious healing, prolonged growth work on your Self, your inner child and your relationship with your Higher Self and Source.
Even when working with a spiritual teacher or healer, if they are doing most of the work for you, telling you all about your Self, then they are merely telling you a narrative, a story. Stories don’t solve problems, or heal. Information or data does not heal. It can point you in the right direction, but ultimately information does not heal, action does.
So if your healer, teacher, therapist or counselor is telling you all about your Self and that is all they are doing, you might want to reconsider. Reevaluate how much help you are actually getting. It is only a mental boost to receive this kind of information. In other words, your brain feels temporarily happy with the excitement of words. But it is ‘drug’ that will wear off quickly. Soon, you will then trotting off in search of another high.
The Myths Of Mercury Retrograde
As a practicing psychic, I have on many occasions spoken to clients who were concerned about the planet Mercury going retrograde. They typically fear that this recurring planetary event might wreak havoc in their lives. While astrologers agree that it can at times be a more challenging time, many of the fears about retrogrades are often unfounded, and based on myth and misinformation. Its potential effect on our daily lives can actually be highly positive and beneficial.
Reputable astrologers quite rightly point out that by truly understanding Mercury Retrograde and how to manage its influence in our life, we can actually turn it into a positive experience, rather than a negative one. For my part, should you have been worried about the Mercury Retrograde in the past, I hope to ease at least some of your concerns here, as to what role this phenomenon can, and cannot play in your daily life.
The Spinning Backwards Myth
The most prevalent myth about Mercury Retrograde is that the planet is ‘spinning backwards’ at this time. The truth of the matter, as any astronomer would tell you, is that Mercury is not actually moving backwards during a retrograde. It only appears to be receding.
The planet Mercury is closer to the Sun than any other planet and therefore circles around it in as little 88 days. The Earth, on the other hand, takes much longer, i.e. a whole year to complete this trip. During a retrograde, Mercury appears to slow down, while Earth seems to move at a faster rate. This creates an optical illusion in the heavens which makes it seem that Mercury is spinning backwards in its orbit. However, Mercury is merely moving more slowly around the Sun, compared to planet Earth.
One can liken this to Mercury being a race car on the inside track, while Earth is on the outside of the track and overtaking Mercury. While doing so, as Earth appears to go faster, it would seem that the Mercury is slowing down or, in fact, going backwards, even though this is not the case.
Resentment And The Empath
Do you have a tendency to re-experience past injustices — real or perceived – while holding on to those old feelings of anger connected to them? If so, it means you are harboring some form of resentment. Empaths are especially prone to resentment, simply because we tap into emotions, past, present, and future, much more than most people.
Resentment forms when we become angry towards a person or situation, and then hold onto that anger. Some people harbor their resentments for many years, refusing to let go of it. Over time, whatever caused the original anger and initially led to the resentment, may be forgotten, but the resentment remains. It is like a still-smoldering ember left after the flames of a fire have subsided. The fire no longer rages, but the ember remains smoldering, and all it takes is a spark to set that fire raging again.
For the empath this rekindled ‘fire’ may be triggered every time they enter a new relationship. No harm has been done, yet, but the empath may be so on guard, and overly vigilant to any slight that resembles their past hurt, that it easily sets off another destructive blaze. They expect the worst and try to protect themselves against it, but in the process the thing they fear the most may re-emerge from the past, unhealed resentment.
For many empaths, lack of boundaries also lead to dashed expectations, typically followed by resentment. As an empath, you feel the heart of the person, and know that there is love. Once connected into the, “I know they love me,” their bad behavior can be overlooked. Continue reading
Make Your Spring Cleaning A Spiritual Cleansing
Although I rent my home, I set aside time each year to spring clean and spiritually cleanse my living space. You may wonder why I invest this time, when I am probably going to pack it all up and relocate soon? Well, I believe the way you treat yourself in your current home will actually help to manifest the joy and happiness in your next home.
Now, spring cleaning conjures up the traditional vision of shaking out rugs, deep cleaning the entire home, and opening all the windows to let the fresh air inside. But, taking the time for a spiritual cleansing, alongside your annual spring cleaning, can let in so much more!
The positive energy from creating a deeper connection to the space around you is actually an investment in not only in your living space, but in yourself. A happy home is a connection to joy and inspiration, and attracts into your life more of what you desire. Putting on hold any and all spiritual connection with your current living arrangement, can actually put on hold your chance to connect with the life you really want.
Clear The Clutter
A highly impactful energy change already begins with clearing out the clutter from your home. Clutter not only blocks your mind and body, but it also blocks energy flow and quite often leaves those living in clutter feeling eternally ‘stuck.’ People who live in cluttered homes often become stuck all areas of their life: emotional, physical, financial and spiritual. Even if you do a little bit at a time, clearing out clutter is the one of the quickest and most positive practical and spiritual changes you can make in your home.
The True Meaning Of Surrender
When life becomes too challenging, and things begin to fall apart for us, we usually seek spiritual guidance and comfort. And in these circumstances we often tend to hear terms like surrender, release and acceptance. We are told to just let it go and simply be in the moment.
But what does it really mean to surrender? It’s a term often used in spiritual and metaphysical circles. Is there even such a thing? And if so, what does it entail? According to the dictionary, surrender means to stop fighting and admit defeat. It also conjures up the vision of waving a white flag. But is spiritual surrender truly nothing more than throwing in the towel, and graciously accepting our defeat?
I prefer to explore the meaning of spiritual ‘surrender’ through the metaphor of a painting I made, which is my way of meditating and reflecting on life. The painting is of an angel and I even named it Surrender. I chose this name, because it is the energy this angel emanates. His pose and posture also symbolizes the act of surrender.
At the time of working with the energy of this piece, I was in the process of leaving the security of a mainstream finance career, to establish myself as a full-time artist, energy healer and spiritual reader. Meanwhile, I was also very busy navigating a family separation and divorce. There were so many major changes in my life, and so much about my future and my life path that remained uncertain and unknown.
During my painting time, I felt connected to an energy that provide me with wise counsel. It was during a time in my life when I wasn’t feeling grounded in my own wisdom, and I needed a way to feel into it. This painting for me became the bridge in my understanding, as I navigated my new life changes.
Aligning Yourself To Attract Lasting Love
When I do readings, many people usually want to talk about their love life. This is a valid and meaningful subject for all of us. Having a meaningful, harmonious and loving relationship is a wonderful part of the human experience. However, it is also true that a relationship often does not solve many of the problems and issues we have as a single person.
It is important to understand that we carry our consciousness with us everywhere we go. If you assume that you will find a relationship that will ‘make you happy,’ then you are deeply mistaken.
Yes, we may draw temporary relational circumstances that allow us to feel a little better about ourselves, but without a firm structure of personal happiness, we will eventually engage in self-sabotaging behaviors that cause the relationship to become unsustainable.
Again, we will carry our consciousness with us everywhere that we go. If we are discontent being single, we will find a way to be discontent in the relationship also.
Every relationship is the product of co-creation. Too often when a relationship does not work out, it is easy to point to the other person and say, “You did this to me.” And it makes sense, because if the original assumption is that the other person will ‘make us happy,’ then we will also make the automatic assumption that the other person can ‘make us miserable.’
Feeling Like You’re Not Good Enough
Sometimes we put our heart and soul into a relationship, only to get cheated on, or dumped for no reason. The main question that usually comes to mind in this type of situation is, “Why am I not good enough?”
Take a moment and consider the relationships of relatives and friends, who have gone through similar a experience. Some people are able to jump right up and move forward, while others sit and wallow in self-doubt and self-loathing – sometimes for years.
Working with many people over the years, one of the biggest eye openers for me has been that it is typically the partner who is left behind, and then struggles to move forward, who compromised the most in the relationship. They usually gave, and gave, and gave, and didn’t receive much in return. Their needs always took a backseat in the relationship. They would sacrifice more and more, until there was nothing left for them to give, while their partner did not change and simply kept using and abusing them.
If you constantly compromise on what you really want from a relationship, the union will at some point simply disintegrate. The other person is never going to magically become someone different. That person you hoped they would become, after you moved in, or after you gave a little more, or after you married them, or after you had a child with them…never shows up. What you see in someone from the start, is simply who they are.