Love & Relationships
Pay Attention Only To Your Soul’s Intent
May I have your complete attention please? I certainly hope not. No one should ever have your full attention. You ‘pay attention’ to yourself, alone. Never, ever, ever in a million billion trillion years are you to give over to another human being your undivided attention, especially if their words are of flattery, praise or exaltation
Exactly what would that entail? Allowing someone else to intrude, violate, impose, and infringe upon the precious sacred theme of your own inviolate mind would be nothing short of blasphemy.
The sanctified domain of your mind is hallowed! Exempt from another’s influence, coercion and derelict impression, your sacred sphere of impenetrable authority is off limits to the invasion of others, no matter their usurped weight and supposed depth of knowledge.
“But, I know what’s good for you,” they might say. Well, chicken squat! No one ever possesses the gift of directed guidance for your particular life. Truth can only be hinted at and never fully expressed. No one is without a self-aggrandized intent of gallows’ ploy.
If you feel someone is using mental intimidation, emotional hyperbole, such as love, hate, guilt, regret, responsibility, respect, adulation, and so forth, as ultimatums, rest assured these worn out blatant tactics are nothing but manipulative water poles to navigate themselves through a river way of shaky unsettled waters.
Maintaining A Lasting, Loving Relationship
We’ve all seen couples who have been together for many years. How do they make it last? Any relationship just beginning will feel magical when it’s in the infatuation stage. But when that’s gone, what then?
Whether it’s a friendship or a long-term partnership, keeping and maintaining a good relationship is generally a lot harder than the fairytale myth of ‘happily ever after.’ But it doesn’t have to be with the basic elements that enable relationships to stand the test of time.
Mutual Respect
Mutual respect is something everyone appreciates. Everyone loves to feel wanted, respected and loved. Avoid belittling or bullying your partner or friend, and don’t compare them negatively to yourself, or someone else. Respecting differences helps is to better see someone else’s point of view. Respect is a two-way street: don’t take too much and don’t expect someone else to give more than their fair share.
Relationships which endure are based in real love and respect. If you’ve been with someone for five years, or for 50, remind yourself why you fell in love with them in the first place. Have date nights and tell the other person that you love and respect them.
How To Keep Your Relationship Strong
Why is it that some relationships are successful, and some are not? When you fall in love your hope is obviously that it will last forever. There is nothing worse than falling for someone, only to end up heartbroken and confused about what had gone wrong, and wondering how you can go back to the way things used to be.
So, the question is, how do some relationships manage to last and stay so strong? I believe it begins with the simple things, like how we greet each other every day, for example. Making the effort to kiss our partner hello and goodbye every time we leave and arrive, is a thoughtfulness that can go a long, long way. It keeps the flame of intimacy burning so much stronger. We should also learn to say “I love you” without any restraints. Those three little words mean so much.
Sometimes of course there will be arguments in a relationship. Developing healthy conflict management skills is therefore essential. We might hit a nerve with each other, but just because we’re mad does not mean we don’t love each other. Every fight does not mean that your relationship is over. Any couple that goes the distance can rise above fights and realize what’s most important.
How To Boost Your Confidence
Sometimes I wish that confidence was for sale! Feeling confident can make all the difference, for example, when you are anxious about accepting a social invitation, without the need for spending hours of internal dialogue trying to convince yourself it will be okay for you to attend. Confidence also means being able to easily decide what to wear for the big night out, and so on.
Indeed, I have marveled at other people’s ability to do such things with ease. However, these very same people are no different than you or me. It is just that they have mastered their mindset with regards being confident, and so can you! Here’s how:
Maintain Healthy Boundaries
Have you noticed certain people in your life encroaching on your space and time? If so, it may be time to implement some polite, yet firm boundaries. By doing so, you should find that this really builds your confidence in both professional and personal relationships, and you no longer feel drained or undermined by specific individuals you have to share some of your time and space with.
Practice Self-Awareness
We hear a lot these days about being more self-aware, but just what is meant by this? Well, it simply means having the ability to recognize when you are falling into a pattern of self-sabotage. Let’s say, for example, you are due to meet a person who continually makes significant demands on you, but you find great difficulty in saying no to them. By learning the art of becoming more self-aware, you can plan, in advance, how to remain strong and firm with this particular individual, so that your relationship with them becomes far healthier.
Are You An Enabler?
Are you an enabler? Enablers come in all forms. I was one. I did it to my children. I was a single mother, and guilt motivates us to think we are doing the right thing, when in fact we are only crippling the recipient. I was also a child enabled by my parents, and the road to get my head straight was long and painful. They didn’t want to say no, so being brought up in an environment where everything is handed to you as a child, creates a crippled adult.
The television series My 600-lb Life, is a good example in my opinion. The people featured in the show are basically hostages in their own beds, due to their obesity. And each and every one of them is enabled by loved ones, family or friends bringing them more, and more unhealthy food. These people cannot go to the store themselves anymore, and yes, they may have eaten their way to where they are, but with the help of their enablers they are continuing to gradually destroy themselves. Is this really the answer? Because they love them and they can’t take that person being mad at them?
I’ve seen this with parent-child relationships. Guilt often compels the giving parent to give, until they bleed, and teaches the child that all they have to do is protest or create a drama, and they get their way. The results can be devastating.
Easy Manifesting Ritual For Today’s New Moon
Today’s New Moon offers a great opportunity to invite new growth and fresh opportunity into your life. The New Moon is a time of rising power and an ideal time for new beginnings and manifesting your desires. This is the perfect moment to set your intention for a new love, a new job, a new home, or any new project you may have been planning.
The phases of the Moon do not imply that the Moon changes in any way. It is the relative position of the Earth and the Moon that changes, creating a variety of angles in which we receive the sunlight reflected off the surface of the moon.
A full lunar cycle is approximately 29 days. The moon ‘grows’ from New Moon and gets ‘bigger,’ until it reaches a Full Moon, after which it recedes again. The eight Moon Phases in order are New moon, Waxing Crescent, First Quarter, Waxing Gibbous, Full moon, Waning Gibbous, Third Quarter, and finally Waxing Crescent.
The lunar cycle does not fully coincide with a calendar month. Some months may have two New Moons, while others only one. When there are two New Moons in the same months, the second one is called a Black Moon and it occur about every 32 months. The New Moon is considered, in most spiritual traditions, the start of the lunar cycle.
Slow And Steady Is The Best Path To Lasting Love
In today’s superficial world of online dating, hookup apps and sexual promiscuity, it’s has become a daunting challenge to find a suitable partner who is genuinely ready for long-term commitment and relationship monogamy.
Also, in the dating scene, people typically wear masks, especially during the initial introduction. Everyone wants to give a good first impression and rarely want to discuss their truth, or past traumas. Dates also like to exaggerate or omit information, to make themselves sound more important or successful than they really are.
A few weeks into a new relationship is usually when the cracks start to show and the truth begins to float to the surface. For example, he comes from a good family and appears to be successful on paper, but he is emotionally fragile, or verbally abusive and narcissistic in relationships. Or, he claims he is totally single when you first meet him, but there’s actually someone else in his life and they’re not breaking that up anytime soon, because they have money invested together or are married.
We too often get so caught up in the fuzzy feeling and fantasy of a person possibly being ‘the one,’ that we forget to question if they are in alignment with what we truly need to add value to our life. Always listen to what a date is telling you, without sugar-coating it for yourself.