mediumship
The Life Calling Of The Death Doula
The first time I heard of a doula, I had no idea what it meant. I soon discovered that it is a person trained to provide guidance, emotional support, and physical comfort to a mother before, during, and after childbirth.
But little did I know at the time that a doula can also be someone who is of service to dying. So, a doula may assist us coming into the physical world, as well as leave the physical world. What a wonderful profession to be called to assist in the miracles of birth and death.
As a psychic medium, talking to loved ones who have crossed over, I have come to understand that some people definitely prefer to be alone at the time of death. My own dad was such a person. He made it clear to us this was his dying wish.
Several people kept vigil at his bedside for three weeks, but the moment we all were away to change clothes or eat, was his opportunity to ‘check out.’ As in life so be it in death, my dad was a very private person.
His hospice room was right across from the elevator. When my mother and I stepped off the elevator, I heard my dad take his last breath and I sensed and felt his spirit exit the building. But I also know he was not ‘alone,’ because his loved ones, guides and angels came to greet him.
So, how does an end-of-life doula help with this process? A doula is there to help the family as much as the person passing. It is my belief that it is a deep honor to be present at a birth or a death. I have had the privilege to be present at all three of my granddaughter’s births. I have also been present at several deaths.
Both are times when emotions are running very high. At a birth everyone is anxious until they hear baby’s first cry. They are on edge waiting to hear baby and mother are both fine. A doula can help explain what is going on and answer questions about the birth process.
Bittersweet Is The Fall
Bittersweet is the fall in Maine. Literally. We have a vine here known as the ‘asiatic bittersweet’ (celastrus orbiculatus) that produces attractive red berries. They are yellow at first, but as they mature the outer shell cracks open to expose a magnificent crimson berry with a yellow coat.
Crafters here in New England traditionally use this vine to make holiday wreaths and decorate their homes. It also adorns the roads of Maine with the combination of fall leaves and green of pine trees.
But the bittersweet vine does its name justice in both sweet beauty and bitterness, life and death, because it is not only adored for its versatility as autumn décor this time of year, but it is also widespread, severely invasive and destructive. It suffocatingly twines high up around trees and sprawls over lower plants and vegetation.
It is not a native plant to the region and was originally brought here as an ornamental plant. As the vine begins to spread and grow to the top of trees it becomes the vine of death for the tree as it covers it completely. A bitter vine.
The fall is indeed a bittersweet time of the year. The natural cycle of life and death. The bittersweet time of year is the time to harvest food for the long winter ahead. Get our homes ready for the snow, darkness, and ice of winter.
In Maine the old timers say ‘button up the house’ for winter. The sweet part is people are thinking of the holidays ahead and gatherings with family and friends. There are traditional recipes. Who will make the best pie? Everyone has a favorite. Whose gravy is the most delicious? It’s a time of gratitude for everything that is good in life.
Throwing The Bones
Before studying various Western disciplines of healing and divination, I trained to become a sangoma some 30 years ago, on the borders of Mozambique and Kwazulu-Natal in Southern Africa, where I learned among other things the divination method known as ‘throwing the bones.’
A ‘sangoma’ casting the bones is the African equivalent of the Native American shaman, the Old Norse rune reader, or the European Tarot reader. To uninformed Westerners, indigenous African methods of divination are often thought of as ‘witchcraft,’ but just like there is good and bad in all cultures and professions, the true calling of the African diviner or shaman is a spiritual one of seeking advice through the wise ancestors. In the same way modern Western diviners rely on spirit guides, angels or the ascended masters for divine guidance, so the African diviner relies upon the ancestors.
My training came about after I consulted another sangoma and was told it was my calling to become sangoma myself. She also cautioned me that until I took up this calling, I would repetitively become ill – and how right she was!
Eventually I heeded the ‘calling’, as unusual as it was at the time for a young English woman to enter the mysterious realm of African mysticism in the country in those days. Training was harsh and intense with my mentor and included coaching in various disciplines, such as divination, dream interpretation, ritual, indigenous medicines, and herbalism over a two and a half year period.
One of the divination methods I was taught is known as ‘throwing the bones’. Since the beginning of recorded history the notion of throwing tokens, casting the dice or drawing lots to interpret the divine will of spirit and the ancestors has been viewed as symbolically linking the diviner to his or her mission. Casting or throwing the bones is an ancient practice native to many regions of the world, including Africa, Asia, and North America. In Southern Africa it is a long-standing ritual among the sangomas of the Zulu, Swazi, Xhosa and Ndebele tribes.
Each bone or token used for casting is part of a kit the sangoma carefully selects with the guidance of spirit, initially with the help of a mentor. Spirit and the ancestors instruct the seeker as to the symbolism and meaning of each sacred item in the collection, and precisely shows the student where to find it and which one to use in a divination. In Southern Africa, a mentor assists the thwasa (trainee sangoma) in the process of learning to receive information from the bones, and in reading the patterns in which the bones are likely to fall.
The Psychic Whispers Of Spirit
Have you ever heard mysterious whispers? If so, what were they trying to tell you? Well, growing up in Columbus Ohio, I often heard whispers or someone I could not see who seemed to be trying to tell me something. Today, I know this is known as the psychic sense of clairaudience.
I could not understand these whispering voices back in the 1960’s, and it was certainly not something you would talk about. Things like paranormal phenomena, mediumship and psychic abilities were simply unheard of in my community! It was different then, not like today.
These days we have easier and more open access to paranormal and psychic books, videos and information sources on the Internet. Nowadays you can just log into your computer or tap your phone, and find something about these subjects; or you can switch on your TV and stream your favorite channel. It seems almost every channel you turn to has some of other program about paranormal or psychic phenomena these days.
I never had the opportunity growing up to tell my parents the truth about my clairaudient ability. It was bad enough that I was able to see stuff and that I knew what would happen in the future. The fact that I heard ‘whispers’ I simply had to keep a secret! But now I know when you have a gift like this, God gave it to you, because he has a plan and purpose for your life.
When I hear these whispers, I have learned to tune into what they are trying to tell me. Sometimes it is my mother or father, who passed on, wanting to tell me something. Sometimes it is my spirit guide trying to get my attention.
Being a psychic my ability to hear these ‘whispers’ gives me a better understanding and access to valuable insights, but it can also be very challenging. For example, my wife and I have been house-hunting for some time now. I was amazed to discover in how many houses I would suddenly no longer hear the realtor or my wife speaking to me. Instead I heard whispering voices asking me questions like “why did I die?” and “Can you help me please?” or “Where have they gone, why are they no longer living here?”
The Origins And Journey Of The Soul
Where do souls come from? Souls are created in a place I know as the Guf, or the ‘Tree of Souls.’ In Jewish mysticism this Tree of Life is located in the Garden of Eden. When this tree blossoms, it produces new souls.
This ‘Treasury of Souls’ is said to be located in the Seventh Heaven. I have seen this place in a dream vision. I could go up to the gold and emerald gates, but could not enter. It is my understanding that all souls are created here by God.
Souls in the Guf are in different stages of evolution. There are young souls and old souls – a diversity of spirit energies waiting to incarnate, reincarnate and ascend.
I can usually distinguish the young, new souls from the wiser and more experienced, because they tend to be a bit ‘wild’ and unrestrained. Young souls are typically eager to experience as many things as possible, and sometimes rush in ‘where angels fear to tread.’ If they are exceptionally gifted, they also need to be guided properly. Many old souls reincarnate to the earth plane to help ground and guide these younger souls.
The old souls also return to provide the physical world with the many things needed for us to thrive, such as advancements in the arts, sciences and technology. Sadly, some greedy, spiritually unconscious humans abuse these gifts to the world for their personal gain. This causes much unnecessary suffering in the world.
When we decide in this life that we would like to have a child, it means our soul wants chooses to take on another soul contract. However, such a soul agreement, like any other contract, is always a two-way process. There cannot be a pregnancy unless the soul of the unborn child also chooses you as parent. In the Guf, souls can decide if they want to join a contract, or not.
The Gifts Of Psychic Communication
How does a loved one in the spirit realm communicate with a psychic medium? Actually, there are many methods of communication that spirit may use to reach us. It mostly depends on the relevant psychic or medium. Each reader or channeler has different psychic abilities.
Some of us can see, while others hear, sense or feel. These abilities are more commonly known as the ‘clair senses.’ Reputable psychics and mediums will always do their best to communicate what they perceive using the various psychic senses. It is advisable to get your psychic readings only from psychics and mediums who have one or more of these abilities.
Clairvoyance (clear seeing): the ability to ‘see.’ It is the psychic ability to see visions in the mind’s eye. It is typically experienced as mental flashes or visual imagery.
Clairaudience (clear hearing) – the psychic ability to hear messages being spoken by spirit.
Clairempathy (clear feeling) –the ability to feel the emotions of others in this world and the next.
Clairsentience (clear sensing) – more commonly known as intuition, such as a hunch or gut feeling.
Claircognizance (clear knowing) – the psychic ability of just knowing things. Along with clairsentience this is the most common psychic ability.
Clairolfaction ( clear smelling) – the psychic ability associated with smells, such as smelling a departed loved one’s favorite perfume.
Miracle Moments In Mediumship Readings
Mediums are a mouthpiece for the spirit world, or the ‘telephone’ in the middle. In a mediumship reading spirit may come through with a short, simple greeting or a full hour reading. The medium is merely the messenger and does not control the process. It is a three-way conversation between the client, spirit and the medium.
It is, of course, important for the sitter or client that spirit gives validating information or evidence that the medium could not possibly know or guess. This ‘seals the deal’ so to speak. The best way to receive these validations is to allow spirit to just take the lead and let the miracle unfold. The medium or the client trying to take charge and steer the reading is never a good idea.
Some typical examples of spontaneous evidence may include their birthname or nickname, their dates of birth and passing, how they passed, their personality and physical appearance when they were in this life, their career or business, their favorite hobby or sport, and even a beloved song, a saying they may have used a lot, or a family inside joke.
An unusual reading I will never forget was the time spirit kept showing me a yellow kayak that had rolled over in the water, to indicate his cause of death. Someone dying in a hospital bed is generic, but there is no way anyone could have guessed such an unusual fatal event. That is what I mean by authentic evidence in a reading.
I love it when a client gets that ‘ah ha’ moment, when they know without a shadow of doubt they are talking to a loved one. It is a beautiful miracle for all involved. Most of the time it is also a deeply healing experience.
I recently had a father come through with the unusual nickname he used to call his daughter. She did not ask me at the beginning of the reading what her father used to call her. He just revealed it to me unexpectedly. This is the best way to approach mediumship readings. In my experience, skeptical ‘test questions’ seldom succeed with spirit. In fact, there is usually no response to such ‘tests.’