Self-Help
Your Soulmate is Not Someone Else’s Partner
Many people go through life looking for their soulmate or twin flame, while they may have already found them. To me a soulmate is simply someone you have a past life connection to and your souls cross paths again in this lifetime. It does not mean they are meant to be with you forever. It does not mean that you are meant to be lovers, partners or any other connection other than, you have been together in some capacity in a past life.
Sometimes clients who consult me about their love life are enamored with another person’s spouse or partner, and are so sure that this person is meant to be with them, instead of the person they are with. But the truth is, the Universe, Source, God, will never send you someone else’s partner to be your life mate.
I hear so often, “But I love him!” Or “We are so good together and she does not love her husband.” But these are merely empty words, or wishful thinking. Chances are you are only being used by that other person. They will tell you exactly what you want to hear. “Oh yes, my spouse and I have drifted apart.” Or, ‘My spouse treats me very badly.” Or the best one, “I’m only staying there until the kids are out of school.” These are simply lines to justify the pursuit of an affair.
Creating Space Between Yourself And The Addict
Everybody needs a little time away. Some of us need much longer. I personally know people who have been together for decades, who have found the best way for them to stay together is to give each other some space.
But some of us need even more space than others, especially those of us who are with people who struggle with substance abuse in some way, shape or form. Spirit says that you can still love someone with addiction issues, but you might need some space and time away for your own well-being. I feel strongly that it is unhealthy to stay with someone if they have an addiction, because it does not contribute to peace in the body, mind, spirit, or the home in which you dwell.
Those that have to live with someone who abuses alcohol or drugs, know how hard it can be to have a meaningful conversation or healthy relationship with that person. The energy is always of a lower vibration. And children caught up in those situations have to feel it more than the adults, who may have learned to put up a shield of protection.
We must create a space between us and the addict, in order to keep peace and harmony in the home, for ourselves and those we love and care about. Keeping a peaceful home is a responsibility not only to ourselves, but to those who we are responsible for.
Communicating Kindness – A Message From My Guides
Our focus today is on being kind to those who are close to you and improve your communication with those you love. Sometimes people are inclined to take their loved ones for granted and speak with them entirely differently than they would speak to a stranger.
It is easy to be kind when showing genuine support and encouragement, but it can be more difficult when giving disagreeable advice, or chastising. Overall, it is much more challenging to be kind when expressing any kind of criticism. To counteract these challenges, we have three recommendations that might help.
Our first proposition is to listen actively. Many people are so compelled to answer while another is speaking that they formulate their responses without actually hearing what is truly being said. They assume that they know where the conversation is going so they miss any nuance or undercurrent within the comments being made.
Staying silent without interrupting can be very challenging, especially when you are eager to expand on positive commentary or ready to disagree with every fiber of your being. It might take an inordinate amount of practice, however, if you can master the art of listening well, people will soon think of you as a great conversationalist.
Sometimes The Solution Is Right Before Us
A client recently asked me why ‘bad things’ keep happening in her life. Why does everything seem so hopeless and nothing is fun anymore? She is constantly in pain and there is really no more joy in her life.
The first thing Spirit showed me was a vision of myself when I was in pain, then a flash of me doing Yoga and how I was no longer in pain. For me the key is to not second guess, just to share whatever I get immediately. So, I simply told this women she must start doing Yoga. “Oh my gosh, she said, “I gave up Yoga some time ago and then the pain came back. I never thought of that!”
We have to be proactive and create positive steps in creating positive outcomes. It is simply the Law of Cause and Effect. We get pain relief from doing things that make us feel good and things that are good for us. Spirit says, “If we do nothing to fix something, nothing will get fixed.”
Sometimes in life we are so busy with the drama and chaos that we can’t think with clarity, in order to see what we need to do. Sometimes the solution is right before us, but we don’t realize it, because we are overlooking it. My client said she felt like a blindfold was lifted . Apparently she sees her old Yoga mat in her closet every day, but chose to overlook it. “Not anymore,” she laughed.
An Attitude Of Gratitude
I find that people who don’t appreciate what they have, often have their gifts and blessings challenged, or even lose it. And obsessing about what we don’t have can lead to depression and anxiety. It certainly does not help you to attract more into your life.
So, consider shifting from thinking about what you don’t have, and what you want and goals, and instead try an ‘attitude of gratitude.’ This is a dramatic shift. Changing from thinking about what we don’t have to instead feeling grateful for what we do have, what we have been given, and what we have already achieved, changes what we attract.
This shift in thinking does not mean you can’t have goals, it just means you don’t feel an emptiness associated with those goals. Nothing is missing. There is just more to be gained. You already have the sundae… it doesn’t need that cherry on top. A cherry would just be a nice bonus!
I’ve seen people become so obsessed with a timeline for getting married, for example, that they soon did get married… but to the wrong person! The universe knows your true destiny. It knows what you need and when. Try to be patient and trust the flow.
Putting 90% of your focus on feeling grateful for what you do have and 10% on what you would still like to obtain, will completely change your outlook on life, as well as your physical and emotional health.
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How To Use Your Astrological Natal Chart
In simple terms, your natal chart is the astrological positions of the planets at the exact time you were born. No two are exactly alike, even for identical twins, because each person’s time and place of birth are different. Free chart makers are widely available online, and all you’ll need is your time and place of birth.
So, once you find yours, what do you do with it? Your birth chart is a kind of road map for life. It will spell out your strengths and weaknesses, as well as hidden dangers, behavioral patterns and potential opportunities.
Each of the planets, including the Sun and Moon, are placed in one of twelve houses (segments) of your chart, representing hours of the day. The movements of the larger planets like Jupiter and Saturn point to larger trends like work habits and societal change.
The ascendant, or sign which was on the horizon at the time of birth, is a powerful insight into one’s personality as well, so it’s helpful to know precise times. An over- or under-abundance of elements or particular Zodiac signs will also provide a mirror to the owner of the chart.
Aligning With Your Circadian Rhythm
The circadian rhythm is 24-hour ‘internal clock’ that governs physical, mental, and behavioral changes in humans, animals, plants and even micro-organisms. I have known for many years that the circadian rhythm was an important aspect of our well-being and that it had to do with our mood and sleep cycles, but recently I discovered some new information that caused me to sit up and take notice.
A renewed interest in the biological process of circadian rhythms appears to to be trending these days, and reportedly it has a much more profound impact on our bodies and our health than merely affecting our sleep patterns. Much of this may be due to the 2017 Nobel Prize in Physiology or Medicine being awarded jointly to Jeffrey C. Hall, Michael Rosbash and Michael W. Young for their work on the molecular mechanisms controlling the circadian rhythm. Their research into what controls circadian rhythms is enlightening.
Their research discovered a gene that controls the normal daily biological rhythms. This gene encodes a protein that accumulates in the cells at night and then degrades during the day. The cells inside our bodies therefore contain a self-sustaining clock that regulates functions such as behavior, hormone levels, sleep body temperature and metabolism. Thanks in part to their discoveries, scientists and doctors now know these day-and-night cycles keep creatures alive by regulating our alertness, sleep patterns, blood pressure, hormones, body temperature, and when we eat.