past
‘Decoration Day’ At The Old Home Place
Memorial Day, which we referred to as ‘Decoration Day’ in my family, is full of precious childhood memories and nostalgia for me. My folks were of Southern heritage mostly, although I grew up in Oklahoma. We lived in the country, on an acreage we called ‘The Old Home Place,’ because it had been handed down for generations.
We had big ole vegetable gardens. In fact, we called one of them a ‘truck patch,’ because it was so large. Soul food, ya know. Nothing better! The truck patch covered five acres. A truck patch is when so many vegetables are produced, there’s enough to truck them out commercially, although we never did. We gave all our friends and relatives what we couldn’t preserve (can) and store in the cellar. In those days we all shared whatever we had.
We also had a small vegetable garden right behind our house, for every day fresh veggies, such as beds of lettuce. In front, we had a potato patch. In other areas there were blackberry bushes, a pecan orchard, a fruit orchard, plums, blueberries, and so on. We were pretty much self-sustaining.
All of the vegetable gardens were plowed by hand with mules, in rows for planting. I used to help with the planting and canning when I was just a little girl. We also butchered our own chickens, pigs and cattle, and made lye soap in a big ole iron pot outside on a wooden fire…all in the old ways. I don’t miss butchering the critters and to this day, I can’t eat animal flesh, except for fish and seafood.
Past Life Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder
Our past lives have an impact on our life today. It is therefore important that we identify patterns and people in our current that could be have a past life connection.
A client recently came to my local psychic healing and herbalism practice complaining of persistent insomnia. He would wake up between 4am and 5am each morning and not be able to go back to sleep. This had been happening for as far back as he could remember.
After we looked at what could be going on physiologically to cause this, and found nothing, I scanned him psychically and saw that there was a past life connection to his restless sleeping pattern.
In a former lifetime he was awakened in the early morning hours by the noise of explosives going off on his property. He lived with his family at that time and their house was on fire after the explosions. He tried to get everyone out of the burning house. One person remained trapped inside, whom he was unable to rescue, and he spent the rest of that lifetime feeling guilty and regretting the tragic event until his dying day.
Spirit showed me that the traumatic event occurred at the exact same time that he now wakes up every morning. He had no recollection of this event, but when I told him what I saw he told me he felt goose bumps all over. Upon further exploration of the impact this past life event had on my client, I soon realized that he was suffering from Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) due to a past life.
Through The Looking Glass
We tend to not see ourselves accurately. We too often choose to focus on our shortcomings and weaknesses, such as we perceive them to be. And I believe we are all guilty of this. I have not in all my years met anyone who was truly satisfied with themselves – until it was sometimes too late.
I was just as guilty of this as anyone else. My childhood was one that I wouldn’t have wished on my worst enemy. I was abandoned by both parents when I was very young. I was raised by an aunt and uncle, who took pleasure in reminding me that my parents did not love me. My aunt also took every opportunity to beat the daylights out of me, while my uncle did nothing.
When I hit puberty, several older males in my ‘family’ began to stalk and harass me. I’d go into the kitchen and soon find myself backed up against a wall. Nobody believed me. Nobody did anything to stop it – not even when I was raped at 16 by a family friend’s son, who was deemed to be a “good boy” and “would never do anything like that.”
I could go on and on about all the horrible things that happened to me, but once I turned that momentous age of 16, and having had the experiences that I have had, I left my aunt and uncle’s home. I went to live with my boyfriend, his sister and their mom. When I left, my uncle dumped all my clothes on the front lawn.
Moving On After A Relationship Breakup
I sometimes have clients who are struggling to move past a recent break-up, or they want to know if they will get back together with an ex. Focusing on the past, by wanting to go back to a happier time, or a relationship that left us sad when it ended, prevents us from living fully in the present. And this may be blocking your path to true happiness.
On the flip side, sometimes the universe will block your forward movement, because you are not truly ready for it. If you need to go through a period of grieving the past, do so in the healthiest way by looking towards the future.
The next chapter for you will be richer if you focus on the path ahead, be it with your ex in a new realm, or someone new. Just know the energy that you give out when you are stuck in the past does not welcome new relationships into your life – at least not healthy ones.
No one wants to go through the pain, sadness or loneliness of a breakup. In my mid-20’s I ended a very serious five year relationship. He had already bought the ring. I knew we were close to making a bigger commitment, but he had broken my trust many times in the relationship.
So, as I looked towards a future with him, I knew I no longer wanted to continue. The relationship ended abruptly and all contact with him was severed, like a death. As I look back I realize it had to end this way, as the relationship was only going in one direction, and I no longer wanted it, even though I still deeply cared for him.
The Past Can Prevent Your Future
Why am I stuck? Why am I not advancing? Why can’t I find love? Why is money never coming to me and always flowing out from me? These are questions I struggled with for a long time in my own life.
I delved deep into many aspects of life design, manifesting change, the Law of Attraction, deliberate creating, and personal growth and reinvention. I have watched, listened and been active in more workshops, online webinars and online learning in this genre than most will ever do in a lifetime. I have read the books and taken many notes. I have made the visions boards and spoken the affirmations. But no matter where I turned, I was always confronted with actual reality versus trying to ‘positive think and believe’ something else. How can we believe we are destined to be something different or better simply by speaking it…or visualizing it? The truth is, it isn’t that simple.
In my search for answers I have also watched others who have participated in the forums, seminars and workshops, and actually achieved something significant in their life. And it has been my observation that the people who have truly risen above their circumstances and achieved their dreams, are the ones that did the deeper inner work.
The Divine Light Within You
Namaste. This is a term that is often used in Yoga practices and certain spiritual services. The word itself is a salutation which means, “The divine light in me honors the divine light in you.” Often people will say this unconsciously. However, it is a spiritual truth that should remind us of the value of our own light and the light of others.
The truth is that you are the light of the world and you always have a choice to honor that light, or hide that light. Spiritual teacher, activist and author, Marianne Williamson, writes, “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.”
The main block to experiencing your own light is fear and the main freedom from fear is love. You are here to be a service to the world. You incarnated for this reason. In fact, we are all here serving each other. Even when something terrible has happened, it gives us an opportunity to see what happens when love is not present within an action.
Sagittarius Shakes Things Up
A few days ago, on December 7th, we had a New Moon in Sagittarius, which has been both invigorating and challenging. It has brought forth a collective desire to break free from the past, which is now stirring up some conflicts or controversies with people, politics and business relationships.
Sagittarius can shake things up to open our eyes and put us on the right track. It’s never pleasant, but the intention is actually to purify and transform our lives.
Emotions have been running high this entire year, so anything that has been suppressed may now rise to the surface and force us to face some harsh truths personally, and with others. Mercury was also retrograde until a few days ago, which offer a perfect opportunity revisiting any problem and carefully finding the best solution.
Energy levels are also low, so take your time and try not to get stuck inside the storm. Avoid being impulsive at this time, because you might regret it later. Also, think about what isn’t contributing to your growth and how you can eliminate anything or anyone who doesn’t make you feel loved or valued. Continue reading