self-worth
A Hopeful Spring Of New Beginnings
Spring is around the corner here in the Northern Hemisphere. Not only is the snow melting gradually, but Covid-19 is also slowly subsiding. Restaurants, gyms and theatres have finally reopened at full capacity, and it won’t be long now before mask mandates are at least partially lifted.
After two years of being ultra-cautious in one of the hardest hit pandemic hot-spots in Canada, this Spring will truly feel like a re-awakening into a brand new world for me!
It’s impossible not to feel a sense of joy and gratitude every year, as the days get longer and the weather loses its frigid edge, but this year’s season of reawakening seems especially blessed and hopeful.
However, against the backdrop of the horrors of war, adversity, and suffering experienced by people in other parts of the world, one must be particularly grateful. We are privileged to live in a place where we are safe, healthy, and comfortable.
Instead of complaining about trivial things, we must look around and count our blessings in our cozy corner of the world. We should choose to be happy for what we have, and appreciate the good things in our lives, no matter how small or simple they may seem.
Now is also an opportune time to regroup and reset our personal priorities, goals, and aspirations. For the first time in a long time we can now confidently begin to visualize our ideal future and take ambitious steps in the right direction. The Universe can only put it all together for us, once we set a clear intention for it.
It’s important to remember that visions boards, affirmations, prayer or visualizing are powerful tools in the manifesting process, but it takes a little more than to do the trick. We must also take some concrete steps and make some practical inroads, so that the Universe can conspire on our behalf to facilitate our success. Even the smallest of efforts will set things in motion.
The Key To Finding True Love
How do I find true, long-lasting love? This is a question I get in many readings, almost every day. True love is indeed a very special, rare miracle. Most people try to find it, but many fail.
I believe the solution is already within all of us, we just need to look inside to find it. Yes, the answer to finding true love is already inside you!
What you need to consider carefully is how much do you love yourself? If the answer is ‘not so much’ or ‘not enough,’ then you need to ask yourself why?
You see, many people do not love themselves enough to feel they actually deserve love. And if we do not believe we deserve love, then we will also not find it. We can only manifest in our life what we resonate with.
Believing that you deserve love simply begins with loving yourself first. When we finally put out of our mind all the self-doubt and lack of self-worth, it changes our mind set to believing we deserve to be happy and to be wholeheartedly loved by others. Then we can move forward by becoming an energy frequency match to finally attracting that someone special.
It all starts is with you. Anyone can achieve and find love, but unconditional self-love is the only viable beginning of that journey. Without self-love and self-acceptance, not other love can survive, much less succeed.
An important byproduct of authentic self-love is that it clarifies your actual wants and needs, and your personal strengths and shortcomings. These are important to know for yourself, as it sets the scene for all your other relationships. Is the person I am dating right for me? You will not know that if you do not know yourself.
How To Avoid Empath Ego-Traps
Being an empowered empath is a wonderful gift and blessing. But the empath ‘label’ can also become problematic when it is misconceived by some as meaning more than it truly signifies.
There are very common ego-traps that some empaths and highly sensitive people get hung up on with regards their empathic experiences. These ego-traps can be very counterproductive, as it may actually be holding them back from meaningful personal growth and progressing our spiritual path.
These ego traps are easy to get wrapped up in, but they are not a sign of weakness or failure. The experience of being an empath is often intense and confusing. These ego-traps offer lessons for us that often go hand-in-hand with life as an empath.
Some of the typical empath ego-traps are as follows:
Empaths Always Know Best
Assuming we are always right about how we ‘read’ a situation or person, or needing to save everyone and be everybody’s ‘therapist.’ We may have a good read that something is amiss, or that someone is upset, but its unwise to assume we always know exactly why.
Often empaths will feel something from someone and decide for themselves why that person is feeling that way. This is a good way to create conflict and tension in relationships! Instead of assuming, rather ask.
And if the person doesn’t want to talk about it, try assuming it is not about you, and that maybe you have no idea what is really upsetting them. Start there. Give the person space and do not make it about you. Continue reading
Being An Empath Is No Excuse
There’s nothing wrong with identifying as an empath. Actually, it can be beneficial to step into this truth for oneself, and own your empathic experiences as a significant aspect of your life.
But for many people it is difficult to take on this ‘label,’ because they don’t feel worthy or they feel they are saying, “I’m more special than other people.” In these cases, there is great benefit in coming to terms with being an empath because it doesn’t have to mean either of those things.
Being an empath is not something they have to be worthy of – it’s a trait they either have or don’t have. And it’s not a matter of being better or ‘more special’ than anyone else – that notion comes from a fear of being judged.
Being an empath means being highly sensitive to emotional energies, and feeling those emotions in your own body as if they were your own. The term ‘empath’ is just a word we can use to describe this trait.
There is some scientific evidence for the empath experience. Studies* show we all have a very specific group of cells in our brain responsible for empathy and compassion, called the Mirror Neuron System. In the brain of highly empathic people, it is thought this group of cells may be hyperactive or hypersensitive.
Being an empath is a wonderful blessing and gift, instead of it being a ‘curse,’ weakness or disability. However, it is important for the empath to become empowered and own their sensitivity.
In order to accomplish this, it is vital for the empath to avoid adopting a ‘victim mentality’ or constantly blaming everything negative that happened in their life on the fact that they are an empath.
Some empaths erroneously believe many of the struggles they encounter can’t be overcome. They assume that they will always be crippled in some way by their experience as an empath. This is false. They may have specific experiences and lessons because they’re an empath, but these are opportunities for growth. Some of the ways this manifests are:
The True Power Of Your Worst Nightmares
When I was 24 years old, I was a somewhat disempowered young lady who went to work for the city council. All the girls in the office had an active social life and a boyfriend, except me.
In fact, I was bullied for it and became a bit of a joke around the water cooler, to the extent that I could not properly concentrate on the task at hand and ultimately lost my job. Looking back, it was one of the best things that ever happened to me. But, at the time, it did not feel like it.
About a year ago, I started to have a recurring dream that I was 24 again, and sharing an office with the same mean girls, supervised by the same misogynist boss. But this time I had a very different mindset.
In my dream, the boss had criticized my work. So, I pick up the documents he complained about to, walk up to his office, put it on his desk, and tell him politely to type his own letters in future. I was going home now, because I am no longer prepared to put up with his nonsense.
Well, if only I had the same courage back in the old days, I might have suffered far less emotional anguish! I felt really empowered in the dream, and it brought me the realization that I no longer have to suffer fools and that I need to stick up for myself more often. However, the dream also revealed to me that I still had not entirely made peace with the past, otherwise the dream would not be recurring.
The moral of the story is that dreams do not only reflect how we are doing in the present, and how far we have advanced in life, but also what we need to do to work on ourselves to be even better in the future. How powerful and life-enhancing is that!
Another compelling dream I have been having of late is of myself flying a light hovercraft over the estate where I lived as a child. I faced several challenging, traumatizing things growing up there, including poverty and domestic abuse. However, this liberating dream confirms that I have managed to rise above those childhood setbacks and obstacles, and I am now in control of my own life and destiny.
Belief Is The Key To Manifesting
Is there something you want to happen, or something you desire, want or need? Put it out to the Universe as a request for what you want to happen in your life. But the key is to believe. If you do not believe it can happen for you, it most likely will not happen…because you are standing in the way of it happening.
Many people sabotage their own manifesting process because they do not believe they deserve to be happy. I have seen this happen so many times. But everyone deserves to be happy.
Things can change in your life. You just need to set the intention, take some practical steps to make it happen, and most of all trust the process and believe.
When you are in alignment with the abundance of the Universe and you trust that it will provide for you always, then it all starts to fall into place. Manifesting begins and ends with believing in the laws of the Universe.
For manifesting to truly work one must have the sincere, unquestioning faith of a child. Young children have the uncanny ability to wholeheartedly believe even the most impossible things!
If we had just a little more of the open-minded belief of children, our lives would be so much happier and more fulfilled. It is not about being naïve, but about being open and accepting.
If we do not trust the Universe to provide for us, we tend to repeat the same mistakes time and again. Instead of setting a clear intention for what they want to be different or better in their life, many people we just keep on manifesting the same old energy repeatedly.
For example, they break up with someone who they felt was not right for them, but then they start dating someone else who is exactly the same. They continue in the same pattern and repeat the cycle of continuous heartbreak, over and over – instead of saying I want to be with someone who treats me better, and work towards that.
Let Your Authentic Self Shine
Most people at some point change something about ourselves in the hope of being better liked or accepted by others. Whether it’s a group of friends, a potential romantic partner, or the manager at work, there is constant pressure to conform and fit in. But in the long run, does this help? The truth is: it really doesn’t.
The notion of simply being your authentic self is challenging in an era where everyone seems to be seeking approval and attention. Therefore, the authentic self or the true version of our soul is something one hardly sees in the digital era of social media, influencers, likes, and followers.
However, we may think that a person we see online is someone others won’t like. Maybe our internal critic sees that person as ‘too much’ of something or ‘not enough’ of another. But we are often mistaken, as someone being true to themselves and keeping it real is what most people are spontaneously drawn to.
You might feel like you’re the only strange person at work, or the black sheep of your family, but you’re not the only one. There are thousands of ‘odd’ people out there right now with the same doubts as you!
The old saying ‘there’s a lid for every pot’ is always good to keep in mind. Your authentic self is just what someone else has been looking for. If you feel you don’t fit in with the crowd, take a step back and ask yourself whether you truly want to be part of it anyway? Knowing your true value and finding the things most important to you, will help determine who you want to surround yourself with.
It’s also important to set healthy boundaries. If you feel peer pressured into joining a group, or liking something simply to fit in, ask yourself if this is true to your core. Does it resonate with your authentic self?