relatives
Keeping My Promise To A Departed Loved One
Sometimes we become so busy and preoccupied in our daily lives that we forget the commitments we made to loved ones, relatives and friends. But this does not only apply to the living. Some of us also forget the promises we make to those that are no longer with us.
Too often we hold the hand of a loved one on their deathbed and promise to look after those they will be leaving behind. They wish for us to look after those they will no longer be able to care for and love in this life. And we promise wholeheartedly to do whatever it is they ask of us in their final moments.
But once they have departed and life returns to normal, we soon forget these promises and serious conversations. Our memories become conveniently selective. We usually don’t mean for this to happen, but life does have a way getting in the way.
I had a shocking reminder recently of my own selective memory in this regard. Several years ago, I got into the habit of journaling about issues in my life that deeply matter to me. Recently, I was not able to sleep and was encouraged by spirit to go through my journal.
So, I sat up at about four o’clock in the morning and randomly opened my journal on the very page where I had written about a promise that I had made to a loved about another person, whom I had a strong dispute with in the past. Being only human, I had some seriously negative feelings towards that individual.
However, I had promised to check in and be supportive to this person, whom I did not like very much at all, on behalf of the person who was in their final hours. At the time, I remember saying that I would “do my best” and that “if I could, I would.”
The promise was much more than just checking in on the relative. It went as far as the very items I was meant to get at the grocery store, as well as things to say to this person when I delivered it. I had however conveniently forgotten about it since, until I discovered the entry in my journal.
Losing Touch With Our Departed Loved Ones
Some people have at least one long-standing friendship from their early childhood years. During your elementary years, the friendship grew to a soft and accepting duality that you easily embraced.
As the time progressed, the ‘best buddies’ syndrome only became stronger, as you melded into the somewhat trying years of early adolescence and puberty. It created an easy belief that this camaraderie would last for the entire duration of your earthly existence. You believed that you would be in each other’s lives forever!
These friendships lend itself to a sense of comfort that helps us deal with the trials and tribulations that young lives normally must endure.
The next thing you know, as you both matured and progressed further in life, your best friend found herself a wonderful life partner, they moved away from your area. But you both vowed to stay in touch and keep the friendship intact, just as it was when you were in your formative years.
At first all was well. You wrote, emailed, texted, phoned, sent the birthday and holiday gifts. You did whatever had to be done to keep those lines of communication open. If all went well, you both did your fair share.
In time, the calls became less frequent, the disconnect between you began to widen, as life took on a unique format for each of you. It is not that you feel less love and affection for each other, it is only that life has a way of moving forward into new and challenging directions. You will always be dear and cherished friends to each other, you will always care about the needs and concerns in each other’s lives, but life moves on.
This narrative is no different if your adored friend and confidant has since left this earthy existence and moved on the other side. We can have clear and constant communication from a loved one that has passed on. Their spirit still has great attachment to those they left behind.
Walk In Faith As You Move Forward
“For we live by faith, not by sight.” I have relied on the words of this verse from 2 Corinthians for most of my life with much success, no matter how tough times have been.
What does it mean to walk in faith, and not by sight? Well, it means to keep going and to keep your faith in God, Spirit, a Higher Power, even when you are not sure of where exactly you are headed.
This past year these words could not have been more relevant. It has been very difficult for all of us, especially for those who have lost loved ones. Sadly, in our day and age, when a loved one passes, we don’t always get the support we need in order to get through the loss and get the help we need to move forward.
Processing grief on your own is no easy task. First we have to accept that our loved one is not with us in the physical sense anymore, but their soul is always with us. They will tell us that they are still here, but they do not want us to have an unhappy life, they don’t want us to be alone.
In our soul contract one of us agrees to leave before the other, whether it is a parent, husband, wife, child, sibling, whomever it may be, and that the one left behind would be experiencing what it means to endure such a loss.
As we struggle to move forward, people might say, why aren’t you feeling better yet? Time to get over it. Life goes on. Why are you still so sad? Well, it just doesn’t work that way, and anyone who has experienced such a loss understands that it takes a lot of time for the heart to truly heal.
I lost my husband of 31 years a long time ago. You don’t ever get over it completely, but it does get easier with time. It’s a step-by-step process, and having people that support you means so much to help you get through.
A Morning Visitation From My Ancestors
Some of the best times I had growing up was visiting my great grandparents during the summer holidays. It was not only fun, but also spiritual and magical. It really helped me to connect with the higher powers that be.
My great grandma was a very magical woman. Her mother was a psychic who would dream the winning lottery numbers for people. She was known as a wise intuitive and many people were jealous of her for many reasons. Legend has it that she used to make wine for Italian mobsters and even had the infamous Al Capone visit her home a few times. She was a happy little Italian lady, who always did everything and everything she could for her kids.
My great grandfather came over from Italy and he was a very stern, powerful man who only spoke Italian. He also made wine and he was much older than my grandma. I think there was a 20-year age difference.
Often, while talking to my great grandma, the lights would begin to flicker in the house and my grandpa, who was an electrician by trade, would then tell me that spirit connects with us through electricity. I thought it was cool and would try to make contact with my ancestors when I was alone.
Grandpa also promised me that when he died, he would come back to visit me. And he did. I shared that whole experience in a previous blog.
Earlier today, during my daily spiritual practice my great grandparents, as well as my grandparents all came to visit me again. We remain interconnected to this day. It is so great to be able to have these mediumship experiences. I saw their faces, surrounded by a pure white light. I could feel the blissful warmth of their love.
Still Hanging On To The Wrong Person?
Are you still hanging on to the wrong person? I know you adore him. I know you love her. I understand that you believe you are soulmates and ‘meant to be.’
But be aware that your beloved has free will. If they are not exactly alignment with you, no matter how you strongly feel about them, nothing will come of your ‘situationship.’ They are on their own journey and you cannot will someone to be your lover or life partner. It is nothing more than the beginning of a colossal heartbreak.
I have witnessed many love-struck people hang on for years to someone that has either left them for good, or kept stringing them along. Some of them have even married and had children with someone else, and yet, they still hang on. They often fervently believe their love interest will someday return to them and then they will live happily ever after. Well, the truth of the matter is that they will not. The other person has made their choice and walked away for a reason.
This new year, with all that has been going on in the world, it may be time to take a few deep breaths and have a self-reflective moment. Take a good, hard look at your life choices and your relationships.
If you are making unwise, self-sabotaging choices, consider what it may be that is not feeding your soul? What is it that is really missing in your life? Maybe it is time to release what no longer serves you. Simply let it go. Find your inner peace, and just be happy and content with yourself and who you truly are.
As a psychic advisor, I encounter the good, the bad and the ugly. I have seen much trauma and damage done, sometimes almost irreparable, to people in toxic relationships and love obsessions. Marriages of several years simply falling apart or ‘trusted’ partner walking out with zero notice. I have watched many go through failed relationship after failed relationship, always with the same results. The result is always the same: excruciating heartbreak.
When the victims of these bad relationship choices are encouraged to do some soul-searching, to see what it is inside of them that is compelling them to go back to the same type of person, time and time again, they are offended and become angry.
Pay It Forward With Holiday Gratitude
As the year end approaches, most of us would normally be shopping, entertaining and gathering with friends and family to celebrate the various holidays and the New Year. Lots of special food, drink and laughter would also be the order of the day!
With a few exceptions, many of our usual traditions are however being curtailed this year due to the COVID-19 pandemic. This year, at a time when holiday shopping, traditional music and festive lights usually brighten the scene, many of us will have to be low-key and socially distanced, even isolated and alone.
In addition, although many people will be able to celebrate virtually, those with limited access to technology will not, so some loved ones will be forced to limit their contact to the telephone only, or even do without.
It is therefore even more important this year to think of those who will not be able to find an easy way to compromise or ‘make-do’ with alternative online shopping or virtual socializing.
Give thought to those you personally know who may have been cut off from their usual social activities, friends and relatives. Perhaps you can make an extra phone call or two, or send an old-fashioned Christmas card by postal mail, or surprise them with the delivery of an unexpected little gift.
Let just one person outside your intimate family circle know that they are still in your thoughts, even though you cannot visit or see them in person. It can make really make a world of difference for someone who is unable to get out to visit friends, or welcome family this year.
Many people have also lost loved ones in recent months and will be grieving this Christmas, instead of celebrating. If you know someone who is in this predicament, do reach out to them and offer a comforting word and some emotional support. Even just a little can go a very long way!
How To Have Peace And Calm This Christmas
The year 2020 has been quite a year! The pandemic has turned the world upside down. Given what we have all been through, there is now an increased emotional need to have something to celebrate, and with Christmas around the corner, we have just that.
However, as magical a time of year as Christmas may be, it can still be somewhat stressful, and this year may prove even more challenging due to the need for safety precautions, social distancing and travel restrictions.
Nevertheless, with a little pre-planning, you should be able to get your Xmas off to a good start and enjoy the celebrations to the maximum without experiencing too much stress and drama in the process! How good is that? Here’s how.
Set Clear Intentions
Given the kind of a year we have experienced, we can indeed be excused for not celebrating a perfectly traditional Christmas this year. We are now in an excellent position to enjoy the kind of Christmas that we prefer.
Let go of the idea this year that Christmas must be ‘perfect,’ and that you must make it that way for everybody. Set instead a clear intention for what your ideal Christmas will be. After that, all you need to do is make plans that go along with your vision. Having established what Christmas really means to you, you can then use it as a guide to prepare your celebrations.
Keep It Simple
Simplicity ensures peace and calm, whereas complexity causes stress and drama. It really is as simple as that! It is imperative that any Christmas plans you make are as simple, straightforward and as streamlined as possible. Doing so should help to create a sense of calm and empowerment, which you will no doubt need to take into the New Year with you.