inner peace
Learning To Say Yes To Yourself
It is in the empath’s nature to say ‘yes’ to just about anything requested of them. It goes against our grain. For some of us, saying ‘no’ also brings on fears of rejection, abandonment or letting someone down when it may be important to support them. Rather than finding an excuse, or simply telling the truth, many of us give in and just go along. It just feels easier in the moment, and even validating or satisfying.
But when you end that phone call, or respond to another text, and you feel anxious and panicked, while you start going over all the other things that will have to fall to the wayside by saying yes, then you really are saying no to yourself. Self-care requires that we sometimes say no to others, in order to say yes to our own well-being and peace of mind. Consequently, the person that you said yes to won’t be getting the best of you. If you have said yes at your own expense, then what you bring to the table for that person is stress and anxiety. Your best self will not be fully present.
Saying yes, when you really want to say no, can also lead to resentment that you then attach to the person who asked for your assistance. Here the responsibility lies with ourselves. We teach people how to treat us and many times we don’t give others enough credit for understanding when we say no. Most people would rather hear. “No thanks, that time doesn’t work for me” or “I have other commitments,” instead of having to sense a half-hearted or less than enthusiastic yes.
Becoming Your Best Self
Know that Spirit is always beckoning you to become your best self. Stay open for the positive to emerge and, with open arms, joyously welcome the blessings of health and wellness, inner peace and wisdom, blissful love, streams of prosperity, and all that your heart desires.
Make a huge effort to quiet the chatter in your world and listen to your inner voice. This may mean muting your television, or not checking in with social media as often. Your quiet time might also manifest through long walks in nature, or soaking in a tub of warm water scented with your favorite essential oils and surrounded by candlelight.
However you choose to silence the outside world and tune in to the sacred realm, trust that your experience will be golden as Spirit will be guiding you to become your best self ever.
Know that you have the gift and ability to visualize and actualize the life you are seeking. See your life as you would love it to be, and ask Spirit to help you define your very best self. Often we set the bar far too low for our best selves. In this manner we cheat ourselves and miss out on fulfilling the divine purpose of our lives.
Comfort In The Arms Of An Angel
I often use one of the rooms at the local library to meet with new clients. Recently, while I was waiting in the library’s cafeteria for a client to arrive, I noticed a radiant light coming in. It was shining on a very old lady seated just across from me. I then noticed there wasn’t a window at all near either of us!
Soon it became clear to me that this unusual light that was shining down from Heaven. Then there appeared also an angel, standing right by her side. As my sight focused I could make out more of the angel, and I also noticed that the old lady was seated in a wheelchair. she had an oxygen tank attached to the wheel chair. She was with a younger women, who looked to be her daughter.
I did not notice much else, just how amazing the light was and how beautiful her angel or guide was behind her. I sensed it was there to comfort her, as she was in a lot of pain and probably would not remain long in this world.
I then realized it was time to leave to meet my client in one of the private rooms, but as I was leaving the cafeteria I heard someone calling my name. I stopped, turned around and saw it was the old lady’s daughter calling my name as she walked towards me. She then told me we went to school together and I immediately recognized her!
Sacred Space
Have you noticed that a certain physical space can influence how we feel? How can a room affect us in this way? Well it’s all about energy. When you walk into a room and people have had a fight there, or received some awful news that may have caused great sadness, we tend to pick up on the energy. We often sense it, without really knowing why we are suddenly feeling angry, sad, or drained.
One of the scripts that I use with hypnotherapy clients is to visualize your own sacred space and then picture yourself inside that space. Just thinking about such a space, where you feel safe, happy and calm, can help to relieve anxious feelings for most people.
There are also just some spaces that seem to promote a sense of belonging and trust that everything is okay. For some people their sacred space may be a certain place in their home, while for others it is simply outside in nature. It doesn’t really matter where your sacred space is, as long as you feel good inside it.
A Few Minutes Of Daily Self-Care
I often tell my students to take some ‘me time’ each day, even if it’s only five minutes for self-care. And I have heard 101 excuses as to why someone cannot do this, ranging from parenting responsibilities and career, to house cleaning and maintenance. These excuses typically start with the words, “I have to…”
At one workshop, I had several people offer their excuses for not having even a few minutes for themselves on a daily basis. Then I narrowed it down to a simple question. When you have to go to the washroom, do you hold it in all day long, and all night, because you ‘have to’ do something else? After the laughter stopped, because I did do an exaggerated imitation of someone ‘holding it’ by rolling on the floor in agony!
And then I asked the next question. By holding it all day and night, and writhing in pain and agony, what did I accomplish? How much time did I waste focusing on this issue of ‘I have to go,’ but ‘I don’t have time.’
This is the simplest way to explain time management versus wasted energy and time. I take a bath or shower each day, as do most people. I am usually at least a few minutes under the water in some way. Water is my peacemaker and my calming force. It energizes me and charges me for the day.
Healthy Boundaries – The Best New Year’s Resolution!
The best New Year’s resolution many of us can work on in 2019 is to create healthy boundaries with the people in our lives. These boundaries don’t have to be all about just creating space or distance between you and a few toxic people and things in your life. It can also include keeping yourself from being exposed to negativity on social media, or avoiding those foods you are intolerant to. In 2019 I recommend we all take a moment to think about the things we do, say, consume, and the people we spend our time with. Whatever it may be that brings us down, or steals our energy, needs to go. And no more people-pleasing.
Dr Seuss says, “Those who matter don’t mind, and, those who mind, don’t matter.” Well, it’s true. Those people who have a problem with you, because your belief system is different from theirs, for example, are absolutely out of line! I have said it once and I will say it again: the world will be a very boring place if we all had the same ideas and way of thinking. Diversity is what keeps our world going. So it’s okay to be different. I am big on keeping it real and being authentic. I refuse to be a conformist.
Your Sacred Center Of Self-Love
We all thrive on being loved. This is natural, of course, if you look back at humanity in history on an evolutionary level. Ancient people came together in tribes, families, and groups, to cultivate a place of safety, security, nurturance, and love. If you were different or stood out in any way, or even left the tribe, you were literally putting your own life at risk. This topic can be viewed from so many arenas, including psychological, spiritual, scientific, and psychic.
I often wonder how and when did we start defining ourselves by how others felt about us, and why did we believe that other’s thoughts about us were true? At what point in time did we allow others to define us? It’s as though we as humanity went into a deep trance.
We all know the phrase, “Love thyself first”. When did we forget this vital piece of information? There are many ways we can come back in touch with this essential truth, but for the most part, our society does not support a lifestyle that would naturally lead us back to our sacred center of self-love. How often do you take a moment to look in the mirror, or tell yourself, “I love you?” Most of us feel silly doing this, but it is very healing.