mental clarity
Ignoring The Signs In Matters Of The Heart
Many years ago, while consoling my best friend after a major breakup, it came to me that she was doing everything possible to continue holding on to what Spirit was removing from her life.
Sitting next to her, as she held on to her laptop hoping to find her lover’s name amidst emails, was like witnessing a tragedy. It was a heartbreak that most of us will experience at some point in our lives, either directly or indirectly.
After a year-long courtship, the ‘man of her dreams’ suddenly began to distance himself without any explanation. The calls became less, the frequent text messages disappeared, and there were no longer any plans on the calendar for their usual weekend outings.
I offered my friend a shoulder to cry on, and searched my mind for the appropriate, most comforting words to speak, but I could feel her gradually pulling away. All that mattered to her at that moment was establishing a deeper connection with her missing-in-action lover.
My friend resisted my recommendation to slow down, to find her center, and most of all… to let go. Instead, she suddenly bolted from her chair, threw on her coat and scarf, and fled the scene.
Several hours later, I received a frantic call from her. While parked outside of her boyfriend’s apartment, she saw him leave with his arm around another woman. Apparently, it was very clear from their mutual displays of affection, that he was in love with someone else.
Months went by, with my friend still holding on to the false hope that her love would someday return. Meanwhile, several very nice men attempted to get her attention, but she turned down each and every one. She even received a lucrative job offer, that came with a coveted geographical relocation, but she refused it. She turned her back on this amazing opportunity for fear of moving too far away from her ex.
Meditation Is Easier Than You Think!
No doubt you’ve heard of the many benefits of meditation, both physical and spiritual. But how does one start a meditation practice? It doesn’t have to be intimidating. According to the Zen master and teacher, Shunryu Suzuki, approaching meditation with a beginner’s mindset is actually ideal.
It’s important to clear up a common misperception about meditation. Meditation is not simply ‘thinking of nothing.’ Rather it is a spiritual process in which we learn to center, breathe, and achieve clarity.
Meditation is practiced by cultures all over the world and does not have to be associated with a specific spiritual tradition or religious belief system. It also does not have to involve sitting passively with a ‘blank mind.’ Rather it can be anything from coloring mandalas, to a walking in nature.
So, how does one begin, if you’re new to the practice? Consider the goals you wish to achieve with meditation: stress reduction, taming your thoughts, physical relief from pain, spiritual growth? Tailor your practice to build toward your personal goals. Remember, it’s a journey and not a destination.
Keeping a meditation journal, as you go along, can be very helpful. The most important thing is consistency. Make meditation a part of your daily routine, and ideally at the same time each day.
Once you have the basics in place, it’s time to begin. Choose a pose or stance which is comfortable, and a space which is calming, private and quiet. If playing comforting music or lighting candles, or incense, relaxes you, then do that!