‘Under-Doing’ For You And ‘Overdoing’ for Others?

Are you ‘under-doing’ for yourself, or perhaps ‘overdoing for others’ in order to gain approval and love? Many of us fall into this pattern without even realizing it.

When we are raised to be helpful, agreeable and accommodating, it can become second nature to say yes whenever someone asks something of us.

For some people it can take many years, sometimes even decades, to recognize that constantly putting others first may not always be the healthy or loving choice it appears to be.

Learning to set healthy boundaries is not something most of us are taught when we are young, especially if we have grown accustomed to keeping the peace by going along with what others want.

Many of us know what it feels like to be the person everyone relies on. When something needs to be done, we are the first person people think of. When someone needs help, they call us.

At first this can feel rewarding because we enjoy being supportive and dependable. Yet always being that ‘Yes’ person can quietly create an imbalance over time.

When we continually give our time, energy and attention to others without receiving the same in return, the natural flow of energy becomes disrupted. Healthy relationships usually involve a balanced exchange between people.

Continue reading →