When It’s Time To Draw The Line!

There comes a time when you need to draw a line and walk away from people who constantly disrespect, criticize, or belittle you.

Even if you can’t walk away completely because you’re related, you need to at least set some clear boundaries and keep them at arm’s length.

But in some cases, it is best to have no contact at all with toxic relatives.

The great spiritual teachers have all taught us the same golden rule.

Jesus said, “In all things do to others as you would have them do to you, for this is the sum total of the Law and the Prophets.”

Buddha said, “Do not harm others in a way that you would not harm yourself.”

Muhammad said, “None of you truly believes until he wishes for his brother what he wishes for himself.”

Krishna said, “This is the sum total of duty: do not do to others what would cause pain if done to yourself.”

Well, the same is true in reverse. You are a child of the Divine. You were created in the image of God. You are a spiritual being in human form. No one has the right to treat you any way they would not want to be treated themselves.

But does ending contact with someone and cutting them out of your life not also violate the golden rule? Are we not supposed to be forgiving and “turn the other cheek?”

Cutting negative people from my life does not mean I hate them, it simply means I respect me. ~ Marilyn Monroe

Certainly not! When Jesus advised us to “turn the other cheek,” he did not expect us to be victims who passively accept the abuse of others. In the context of that time, turning the other cheek was a way of shaming your aggressor by forcing them to also strike your other cheek while you look them in the eye. It was a way of courageously standing up for yourself without resorting to violence or stooping to their level.

That is exactly what setting boundaries and going no contact is all about. It is about keeping the peace by keeping your distance.

I have had to take a stand and say enough is enough with a few people in my life. I did so again recently because I was no longer going to tolerate someone who clearly has no intention of ever changing his ways. This person is one of the most arrogant, rude, and conceited people I have ever met.

The fact that we are related made me feel obligated to stay in touch and respond to text messages for several years, because I was raised with the notion of “family first.” It took me a while to figure out that sharing a few DNA markers with someone does not automatically obligate you to put up with their disrespect and abuse.

When it finally dawned on me that I absolutely had the right to exercise my free will, I took steps to get this person out of my life and as far away from me as possible.

Amazingly, my health and well-being have improved since I banished his toxic presence from my life. It was yet another reminder of the importance of protecting and shielding your energy from unwanted negativity and energy vampires.

The principle is really quite simple. If you continue to expose yourself to negative, toxic people and their poisonous energies, your mind, body and spirit will become unhealthy and poisoned. Toxic energy is contagious. It may take a while for the signs and symptoms to appear, but your health will pay the price eventually.

The key is to never let it get to that point. Some of the most empathetic, compassionate people I know have allowed themselves to tolerate certain people in their lives for far too long. They have given them chance after chance to change their ways, to no avail.

Having toxic parents or a toxic family is more challenging than those with relatively functional families can imagine. Nothing is ever a simple conversation. Almost everything is riddled with passive aggression, subliminals, trauma and projection ~ Cindy Aneh

Too many of us allow ourselves to be the victims of callous, uncaring relatives. We intuitively know when we are not being treated with the love and respect we deserve. Our higher self knows when to leave an unhealthy situation or relationship. Yet, so often we choose to stick with these folks and hope for the best.

If you have been doing this with someone in your life, know that you will not be the only person who may have to go “no contact” with one or more members of their family. According to a survey conducted at Cornell University, more than one in four Americans report being estranged from another relative, while research for the British non-profit Stand Alone suggests the phenomenon affects one in five families in the United Kingdom.

We often also fool ourselves into thinking that things will be better if we rarely see them in person, but then we continue to stay in touch with them through texts and social media posts. Make no mistake, those forms of communication and interaction are still an exchange of energy. Just think back to the last time someone drained your energy with a comment or video post on a social media feed. My guess is that it hasn’t been that long ago either!

Be mindful of who you allow into your life and energy field, including who you allow yourself to text and communicate with. If it doesn’t feel right and their presence does not add value to your life, then they are not good for your mind, body and spirit. It may be time to change your ways. Your health and well-being will thank you for years to come.

Start to invest some time in spiritual self-care and self-healing. Raise your energy vibration to a higher level by doing things that are good for your mind, body and soul. Work on healing those cracks in your aura that may be leaking energy. Often the first step in this process is to draw that line in the sand and say: no more.

You will start to feel better very quickly especially if you train your mind to focus on the good things in your life and you work every day on staying in your joy.

Let go of the toxic people in your life. Be like the trees I’m looking at right now through my window. They are dropping their leaves to get ready for beautiful new blossoms next spring. Let go of the stale old energy influences that try to keep you down. You deserve so much more. Go ahead and draw that line in the sand, and this time be sure to stick to your guns.