Anger Awareness For The Empowered Empath

Of all the emotional energies that empaths have to deal with, anger is one of the most powerful and potentially destructive, because empaths feel and react first, and think later.

An empath’s initial reaction to someone else’s angry feelings is usually some form of intense “fight or flight” response.

The more extroverted empath will often respond to the anger with equal force, usually involving a very intense and potentially catastrophic emotional outburst. The introverted empath will usually “flee” the scene or do everything possible to avoid the person who is emitting the anger.

After the initial reaction, the empath’s emotional state will often then shift to sadness, anxiety, or feeling drained and depressed at seemingly inappropriate times and for no apparent reason.

Because it is very common for empaths to be intensely aware of the feelings, moods, and motives of others, sometimes even before others are aware of their own feelings, a strong emotion like anger deeply affects us. And if the other person is a spouse or partner in a romantic relationship, anger can become a proverbial land mine. Ditto if it is a co-worker or employer.

Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured ~ Mark Twain

In personal and professional relationships, the empath will begin to either retaliate, withdraw, or avoid altogether when they perceive intense anger. An empath in extreme distress is like a caged tiger – restless, anxious, agitated, and just waiting to pounce or escape. The consequences can be disastrous. An empath who is not adept at handling intense emotions such as anger can become a proverbial bull in a china shop when it is least needed.

Empaths who have not yet learned to deal with unwanted emotional influences tend to absorb them. In the case of anger, this can be very toxic and self-destructive, as internalized anger turns into migraines, ulcers, high blood pressure, depression, insomnia, digestive problems, and even cancer. It is vital for the health of the empath to process anger effectively.

When I started doing readings, I learned very quickly what unprocessed anger from others can do. Empaths “step into” the feelings of others, and no matter what is said, we always feel what is really going on beneath the surface. Old anger feels very “putrid” and “heavy” as it turns into bitterness or resentment – extremely unpleasant. Fresh anger feels much more “searing,” like standing too close to an open flame.

It is important for the inexperienced empath to learn that anger is really fear or pain at its core. The empowered empath knows not to take all anger they pick up on personally, for if you stay calm and centered and go beyond the surface, you will often feel the energy shift to fear or pain. Anger is often just a shield for deeper feelings of fear or pain. It cannot harm you unless you take the bait by making it personal and overreacting to it, or by making it your own.

Learning to distinguish between one’s own emotions and those picked up from others is essential for the empath. Many empaths handle anger inappropriately because they do not know when anger is their own and when it is coming from someone else. This can lead the empath to act out in response to anger that is not even their own, or to project their own anger onto others, instead of processing their own feelings and dealing with what triggered them in the first place. It can get very messy!

You will not be punished for your anger, you will be punished by your anger ~ Buddha

Distinguishing between one’s own anger and the aggressive energy absorbed from others can be a tricky skill for empaths to master, but it’s definitely possible! Here are three awareness strategies that can help:

Baseline awareness: Cultivate presence and mindfulness, spend time in a quiet environment meditating, do a daily body scan, and pay attention to your natural emotional states. Regular mindfulness practice can increase your emotional awareness and your ability to detect subtle shifts in your internal state. This will help you establish a baseline for your own emotions, making it easier to identify shifts caused by external influences.

Contextual awareness: If you feel sudden anger, pay attention to your surroundings. Does someone else around you seem angry? Can you identify why they might be angry based on the circumstances? Do you sense a recent argument or tension in the room? Is the emotional intensity sudden and inconsistent with your recent mental state? Was your mood calm before this particular interaction?

Interal awareness: Notice if your thoughts about the anger feel connected to your personal life or more focused on someone else’s situation. Your inner monologue can provide valuable clues about the source of the emotion. Also pay attention to physical sensations in your body. Anger often manifests itself physically. Notice if your own anger feels different from what you sense in others. For example, is your muscle tension in your jaw, like your own frustration, or in your chest, like someone else’s distress? Keeping a journal to record your feelings and observations can help you identify patterns and triggers over time.

Remember, distinguishing between your own and others’ emotions is a continuous learning process. Be patient with yourself, experiment with different approaches, and celebrate your progress!

Understanding the nature of psychic empathy and emotional contagion enables the empath to develop more effective and healthy coping strategies. Unwanted, undeserved anger from others can only affect you if you feed it with your own reactions, thoughts, and feelings. Anger is like a fire that needs emotional oxygen to thrive.

Anybody can become angry — that is easy, but to be angry with the right person and to the right degree and at the right time and for the right purpose, and in the right way — that is not within everybody’s power and is not easy ~ Aristotle

Empaths are gifted healers and energy transmuters. An empath who responds calmly to anger can have a very powerful effect on others as well as themselves. The key to staying calm in the face of anger is to remind yourself that the emotion isn’t coming from you, but through you. This allows you to step back and observe what you are feeling and get to the root of it.

If it is an energy exchange with a romantic partner, this is especially important for the empath. If it is a co-worker, then less is more. Empowering the empath is about bringing the energy of compassion, patience, tolerance and love to the forefront, rather than being constantly drawn into the emotional drama of others. Your unspoken energy of kindness, peace, respect and serenity can quickly calm any angry vibe.

It’s important for empaths to remember that managing sensitivity to others’ emotions is a personal journey, and what works for one person may not work for another. Experimenting with different strategies and being patient with yourself are key components to effectively managing perceived anger in yourself and others.

It is also important to note that there is a difference between perceived anger in another person from time to time as opposed to someone in your life who is consistently aggressive or abusive toward you. It’s important for empaths to set healthy boundaries to be safe and protect their personal well-being. This may even require the empath to end a relationship if they are the victim of a partner or relative’s constant rage, or even violence.