When Your Child Is Your Spiritual Coach

Coming from a family who never communicated their personal feelings, I learned a lot about the importance of communication between age groups in my early teens, when I was sent to live with a Dutch family with three children for several months.

I always admired their closeness, but it wasn’t until I actually moved in with them, that I realized just how far their caring and sharing went towards feeling part of such a close knit family. They prayed together too, and included me, always asking for healing for my mother who was having treatment at the time for her ‘nervous condition.’

In later years, as a recovering alcoholic in Alcoholics Anonymous (AA), I would often hear the expression, “A family that prays together, stays together.” I am sure this family has stayed close all these years, even though we have lost touch.

While we try to teach our children all about life, our children teach us what life is all about ~ Angela Schwindt

One of their secrets to a better understanding of one another happened every Friday, at dinner. Everyone in the family was then given the opportunity to say their piece about how they were feeling in relation to anyone else at the table, and how any inappropriate remark made, or hurtful behavior of the week before, had made them feel. Any unresolved issues were discussed. There were never any fights, or raised voices, just further supportive talks as to what might have prompted they hurt or unresolved issue.

I found it remarkable how the parents would often hang on to every word their nine year old son had to say. He spoke from his heart on many occasions, and certainly let his parents know when he thought they were out of line in any way! Theirs was a perfect example of mutual respect and understanding. It was certainly not a case of ‘children should be seen and not heard.’

Just a few days ago, I read for a long-standing client who lives in another country. She and her husband of some 27 years have had communication problems for as long as I can remember. I have been reading for her entire family for many years now. Her most recent reading suggested a crossroads decision coming up soon in their relationship. There was either going to be a divorce, or some deep healing was about to take place.

There was also great emphasis in the reading on the fact that their young son was going to be playing a major role in the decision they will face. Whilst she was pregnant with him, she asked me to do a reading on him to see if I was able to pick up any personality traits of her unborn child. I certainly picked up a wise soul coming into their lives – one who would be more like their spiritual teacher. I also recall telling her that as soon as he began talking, both she and her husband were going to be blown away with some of the profound remarks and expressions he would randomly come out with.

Her husband tends to have a very sharp tongue when it comes to disagreements, as well as having an indifferent attitude to the feelings of anyone else at home. She admits that she has mostly stuck out their marriage these past few years, despite his moods, for the sake of their son, in order to give him some kind of family structure.

Today, I got the confirmation from her that their son has been instrumental in clearing the air and finally moving their relationship forward. He has been the catalyst in helping them bring to the surface their resentments and assumptions about one another.

My children have always been great inspiration for me, and great teachers, and keep me very close to the ground and very humble ~ Wayne Dyer

Shortly after our reading, their boy had actually composed a song about his family, featuring their ups and downs and the many petty disagreements between his parents, as well as with their in-laws. He sang about how he believes they can work things through as a family with the love he knows is there.

She sent me a recording of this amazing song written by a young child. After listening to it, the two parents got somewhat of a ‘disciplinary hearing’ from their beautiful boy, during which he, in no uncertain terms, highlighted the pitfalls of their behavior. It was a pivotal moment for them and their healing as a family has now begun.