Elizabeth And Me

I’m running the sole of my foot over the top of her soft, furry coat – from the crown of her head, all the way down to where her tail begins. She arches and luxuriates in this gentle and soothing caress.

We have been sharing this deeply healing form of intimacy for nearly 14 years. Elizabeth was a Christmas gift from a dear friend. Since her puppy days, have never been apart for more than a few hours. Never for a night! Whether it be wood, stone, clay, molded bronze, copper, gold or any material that is totally solid and bonded – we are made of that. Our togetherness is my greatest pleasure. Our love is my deepest treasure. She is my sunshine, my shadow and everything in-between.

I think dogs are the most amazing creatures; they give unconditional love. For me, they are the role model for being alive ~ Gilda Radner

I wake up every morning singing, “You Are My Sunshine” to her, although she has lost her hearing now. Because one of her knee-caps had slipped, we can no longer play ball like we used to for an hour every morning, and another hour every evening. Our all-time record was for four hours, non-stop. We were the best team ever!

She would wait for me to yell, “Let’s play ball”, in that imitable tone like a pitcher at a baseball game. Then, I would throw the ball with my long distance ball thrower and she would run and sometimes, literally, fly through the air. She took so much pride and joy in her athletic ability, and perhaps showing off a little (or maybe a lot).

Other times, I would ask her if she wanted to climb a tree. And, she would run to the nearest tree and start to scamper up its trunk, like a cat. I would have to tell her to stop before she climbed too high, because, unlike a cat, she wasn’t so great at finding firm footing on the way back down.

Once she climbed a tree at a local trailhead, on our way out from our hike that day. It was getting dark and starting to snow. There was no cell phone reception for miles, due to the mountainous terrain, and we were the last hikers out. To make matters worse, the tree hung out over an arroyo. It was a long way to fall and we both knew it.

I sat down at the base of the tree, telling myself not to panic, so I could think clearly. I realized there were only two ways out of the predicament we were in. One way was to take my car and drive to get help, which at this point was unthinkable. What if she managed to get down and I wasn’t there? Coyotes, bears and mountain lions roam these mountains. Or, she might freeze before I could find her if she got lost. All these things were going through my mind. However, somehow I remained calm and realized that I had to talk her down. Period.

Dogs are our link to paradise. They don’t know evil or jealousy or discontent. To sit with a dog on a hillside on a glorious afternoon is to be back in Eden, where doing nothing was not boring–it was peace ~ Milan Kundera

So, I stood up and calmly began telling her she had to start down, taking one step at a time, until she could jump and I could catch her in my arms. It seemed like a mission impossible, but it worked! She seemed to have understood every word, and began her descent by taking that first step on to the next branch on the way down. After only two or three steps down, teetering and wobbling, not to mention terrifying for both of us, she finally was far enough down the tree for me to catch her. I called out to her, “Jump!” I still get goose bumps when I think about it, because there is no doubt in my mind that we experienced Divine Intervention that evening. Elizabeth jumped perfectly! And I caught her perfectly, as if we did this exercise every day.

I was trembling with relief, as we sat down together at the base of that tree. The snow began falling profusely in the now total darkness. I wept for joy, as I thanked the Divine for this great miracle. Then we made our way to the car, and I was still shaky while driving home on that narrow, winding mountain road with the notorious dead-man curve, but I hardly noticed. My gratitude knew no bounds.

Although there are more and more things Elizabeth and I are no longer able to do together, as a result of her advancing age, we have developed new bridges. Often, we stare into each other’s eyes at great length. She initiates it, letting me know that she needs this deep level of connecting, the same as I do. Regardless, that we used to have other ways that we both miss, this fills any void in an even deeper way.

I’m grateful to her every time we engage in this amazing communication. In the depths of her eyes, I hear messages that transcend time. And, I know, timelessness is the essence of us. We are each other’s greatest pleasure, deepest treasure, sunshine, shadow and everything in-between. We are Elizabeth and me.