spiritual advisor
The Life Calling Of The Death Doula
The first time I heard of a doula, I had no idea what it meant. I soon discovered that it is a person trained to provide guidance, emotional support, and physical comfort to a mother before, during, and after childbirth.
But little did I know at the time that a doula can also be someone who is of service to dying. So, a doula may assist us coming into the physical world, as well as leave the physical world. What a wonderful profession to be called to assist in the miracles of birth and death.
As a psychic medium, talking to loved ones who have crossed over, I have come to understand that some people definitely prefer to be alone at the time of death. My own dad was such a person. He made it clear to us this was his dying wish.
Several people kept vigil at his bedside for three weeks, but the moment we all were away to change clothes or eat, was his opportunity to ‘check out.’ As in life so be it in death, my dad was a very private person.
His hospice room was right across from the elevator. When my mother and I stepped off the elevator, I heard my dad take his last breath and I sensed and felt his spirit exit the building. But I also know he was not ‘alone,’ because his loved ones, guides and angels came to greet him.
So, how does an end-of-life doula help with this process? A doula is there to help the family as much as the person passing. It is my belief that it is a deep honor to be present at a birth or a death. I have had the privilege to be present at all three of my granddaughter’s births. I have also been present at several deaths.
Both are times when emotions are running very high. At a birth everyone is anxious until they hear baby’s first cry. They are on edge waiting to hear baby and mother are both fine. A doula can help explain what is going on and answer questions about the birth process.
Make The Most Of Your First Psychic Reading
First-time clients calling me at Psychic Access do not always know what they should ask or how to prepare for a call, especially if it their first time getting a psychic reading. After many years of helping people all over the world, I can offer the following tips and guidelines to make the most of your first reading.
Choose The Best Psychic
Psychics are not all the same and they have different abilities, skills and styles of reading. Psychics tend to also specialize in different types of readings. So, it is important to not just choose someone for your first reading based on the photo, name or other superficial information.
Take some time to study the profiles, watch the introductory videos, and read their testimonials. It is not so much about finding the ‘best’ psychic on the site, because on a reputable site like PsychicAccess.com everybody is good at what they do. Instead, your aim should rather be to find the best psychic for you.
First get some clarity about exactly what you want to focus on. Do you need a reading regarding your departed love ones, love and relationships, career or business, your pets, and so on. Look for someone who seems to best match your needs and personality.
Throwing The Bones
Before studying various Western disciplines of healing and divination, I trained to become a sangoma some 30 years ago, on the borders of Mozambique and Kwazulu-Natal in Southern Africa, where I learned among other things the divination method known as ‘throwing the bones.’
A ‘sangoma’ casting the bones is the African equivalent of the Native American shaman, the Old Norse rune reader, or the European Tarot reader. To uninformed Westerners, indigenous African methods of divination are often thought of as ‘witchcraft,’ but just like there is good and bad in all cultures and professions, the true calling of the African diviner or shaman is a spiritual one of seeking advice through the wise ancestors. In the same way modern Western diviners rely on spirit guides, angels or the ascended masters for divine guidance, so the African diviner relies upon the ancestors.
My training came about after I consulted another sangoma and was told it was my calling to become sangoma myself. She also cautioned me that until I took up this calling, I would repetitively become ill – and how right she was!
Eventually I heeded the ‘calling’, as unusual as it was at the time for a young English woman to enter the mysterious realm of African mysticism in the country in those days. Training was harsh and intense with my mentor and included coaching in various disciplines, such as divination, dream interpretation, ritual, indigenous medicines, and herbalism over a two and a half year period.
One of the divination methods I was taught is known as ‘throwing the bones’. Since the beginning of recorded history the notion of throwing tokens, casting the dice or drawing lots to interpret the divine will of spirit and the ancestors has been viewed as symbolically linking the diviner to his or her mission. Casting or throwing the bones is an ancient practice native to many regions of the world, including Africa, Asia, and North America. In Southern Africa it is a long-standing ritual among the sangomas of the Zulu, Swazi, Xhosa and Ndebele tribes.
Each bone or token used for casting is part of a kit the sangoma carefully selects with the guidance of spirit, initially with the help of a mentor. Spirit and the ancestors instruct the seeker as to the symbolism and meaning of each sacred item in the collection, and precisely shows the student where to find it and which one to use in a divination. In Southern Africa, a mentor assists the thwasa (trainee sangoma) in the process of learning to receive information from the bones, and in reading the patterns in which the bones are likely to fall.
The Lotus Flower Reading
I recently attended an online psychic development workshop. In one of the tasks, we had to partner with another student and do a ‘flower reading.’ I know touching an object using psychometry works well in readings, but this is something else.
Our teacher paired us up and we didn’t know in advance with whom. We also had to intuitively pick a flower for our partner beforehand. At the beginning of the session, we had to show the other person the actual flower or a color photo of the flower we had chosen for them on our shared screens.
In preparation for this, I placed many pieces of paper, each with the name of a different flower on it, into a bag, shook it up, and drew one. Spirit guided me to select the Indian lotus flower or nelumbo nucifera.
When it was my turn to read for my classmate, I relaxed and observed the image of the lovely white lotus in front of me. The depth of information that came forth in the reading about her past, how her life was now, and what lay ahead, was truly amazing!
The reading revealed that she was going to be blossoming soon like the lotus, because she currently finds herself in a strong development stage. I later learned that she’d been through some dark times, almost giving up on herself. She had recently begun doing deep shadow work, as well as exploring her psychic development.
She is also recovering from a recent trauma and the lotus is traditionally known for being the ideal gift for someone recovering from any traumatic experience or physical injury. Many years ago, I attended a Yoga class during which the challenges of the lotus position was discussed in-depth. The teacher said that through proper breathwork and becoming more flexible, one’s body will allow you to achieve this pose.
I was only 19 years old at the time and not very supple. I saw no hope of achieving that position for quite some time. However, only a few classes later, we did a session during which a lot of emphasis was placed on our breathing. And to my amazement, I was able to easily get into the lotus position!
The Ability To ‘Read Energy’
I use energy reading a lot in my work as a psychic advisor. I tend to read people’s energy first, and then I may ‘hear’ words and phrases, or ‘see’ images and visions, and so on. What is it like to ‘read energy’? The experience is not easy to put into words. It is both a feeling and a sensation, often combined with various sensory experiences.
For example, I once saw a photo of my friend’s baby grandson. I instantly sensed something was unusual with his mental energy. His energy, which I ‘see’ as a ‘ball,’ seemed slow. It was also moving in swirls, instead of the neat circles that I usually see with most people. It later turned emerged that he has a learning disability.
I also had a sense at the time that the parents needed to take this seriously and get him some private therapy, as it would lessen the difficulties he would have later in life and his education. But they chose not to do anything about it. As time went on it was becoming more and more obvious that he was struggling. Sadly, it could have been significantly lessened with early intervention.
When I meet people who are depressed, their energy is also slow, and it typically feels like it is diminished and moving backwards. Anxiety on the other hand reads as their ‘ball of energy’ being on fire. It is red and expansive, and the energy seems to be moving erratically.
Mental illness reads like the waves of the ocean. Instead of all their energy circling in the same direction, there are many waves going in many different directions. The energy is typically ruptured and chaotic.
People who have severe physical inflammation have energy that swells beyond their ball of light. It feels like a tire that has been over-inflated with air: dense and puffed up. Inflammation also affects their thought patterns.
Dark or evil energy is very distinct. I always have a visceral reaction first. I feel a tightness in my gut, the hair on my arms stand up, I begin to sweat, and I tend to feel nervous and on edge. The energy ball here can be anywhere from a dull brown, to grey or even black.
Making The Most Of Psychic Guidance
Sometimes you receive information in a psychic reading that you do not immediately understand or may think does not apply to you at all. Never disregard any information or message you receive. It may not make much sense at the time, but it usually will make a lot more sense later on.
When there are aspects of a reading that you do not understand, you may think the psychic is making a mistake or she does not know what she is talking about. You may even be critical or skeptical of her psychic ability. But if you are consulting a gifted, reputable reader then you can be sure she is simply relaying what spirit is communicating.
There is much we do not know or understand about the mysteries of life. The ways of God, Spirit, Source, the Universe does not always make sense to our limited human perspective. The best approach is to keep an open mind and to not be afraid to grow, change and evolve. Always remember there is a higher power that guides and protects us.
Psychics often say your guides are “giving you signs.” This means your guides are sending you messages, trying to nudge you in a certain direction, or assisting you in some way. Pay more attention and be aware.
Change is uncomfortable and the truth can be challenging. It can be extremely uncomfortable for some people. But we must never hide or be in denial. If you follow the guidance of spirit you can start to make the right choices for yourself, instead of being guided by fear or ignorance. Things will start to fall into place if you follow the signs.
The Truth Be Told
Have you ever been told you are just too honest? Well, I have, and this very statement has given me a lot of food for thought. I have been wondering why being honest does not typically win any popularity contests?
It took a lot of meditation and mulling it over in my mind for several days, for me to finally decide how I felt about people being ‘too honest.’
Truth be told, I would much rather be honest and deal with other ‘overly honest’ people, than the opposite. I prefer not to have people smile to my face, and then later stab me in the back.
A client who has been reading with me for over a decade, came for a session recently. She was very depressed and teary-eyed. Before we even started, I saw in my mind’s eye my symbol for a broken heart. I also saw that she would find healing, but not soon.
It soon unfolded that her boyfriend of two years had in fact broken up with her and moved out. Spirit then showed me that she had been too honest with him. “He doesn’t always appreciate it when you tell him the truth,” I said. “Even when he asked you for your honest opinion, he would be offended when you gave it to him.
“Yes,” she replied, “the reason he moved on was that I was too honest and direct for his liking.” Just unbelievable, I thought to myself.
Apparently, many people feel it’s okay to tell a little white lie. This is usually the case when they feel being very honest will possibly hurt the other person’s feelings. In my mind, when you ask for an honest opinion, then you are open to the truth. If not, then don’t ask. When I ask my best friend if a pair of blue jeans makes my butt look big, then I really want to know – the truth!
This is what I love about doing readings. Spirit only gives truthful and honest answers. The recipient of this guidance then knows how their choices will influence the direction or the outcome of a situation.