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Empowering Life Lessons From My Abusive Father
My father Jim had to grow up quickly in the tough pre-war years. He was the eldest of six children and he did not have an easy childhood, nor tolerant parents.
But life became even more challenging for Jim as he reached adulthood. My parents were married at the age of 21 and had three kids by 23, and another baby at 34.
Jim faced many challenges. As a result, to vent his frustration and process all the stress, he often took it out on those closest to him, namely his wife and children.
Let’s just say my father was not always the ideal husband and parent. It became so bad by the time I was an adult that he would do whatever he could to disrupt my life and my family in any way that you might imagine. The sad part was that he actually wanted to hurt us, as doing so gave him a bizarre sense of satisfaction and control over those closest to him.
I first became fully aware of my father’s desire to disempower his kids when I was about 22 years old. The year was 1982, and jobs were very hard to come by in the United Kingdom in those days. I had an office job but wanted something better. So, I decided to attend school for a year to learn shorthand and typing at the local technical college.
One day, I asked my dad if I could get a ride with him to college, because I had to sit an important exam at 2pm that day. He said I need not worry, as he would drop me off in plenty of time. But then he proceeded to make every excuse not to leave the house!
By quarter to two, I started to panic, as I could not possibly walk or catch a bus from my house to the college with so little time. At ten minutes to two, he finally agreed to take me to sit the exam, but then when we got in the car, he said he needed to go to the garage for gas. I looked at the fuel gauge and saw the car’s tank was full.
I suddenly realized he did not want me to sit the exam, as he did not want me to pass it and better myself and become more independent. Thankfully, his sabotage attempt failed, as I did pass the exam and went on to get a higher paying job.
Power Of Love, Or Love Of Power?
You may be familiar with the myth about the city of Atlantis and the civilization that is believed to have once existed there. The inhabitants of Atlantis are also believed to have been very advanced spiritually, much more than we are today. They were a psychic people and possibly communicated telepathically. They were able to build amazing structures and move impossibly large objects, and also do other amazing things that would be unheard of at that time.
The Atlanteans also used crystals, like some of us do today, and they had a higher spiritual or cosmic consciousness. It certainly must have been a very saintly realm. But, as the story goes, there came the influence of a dark, negative energy that made material things look more and more attractive to this advanced people. They turned to material desires and increasingly sought material gain and self-indulgence.
Sometimes it seems we are also going the same way. These days people are more interested in personal gain, getting rich, and owning more. Personally, I find it very sad and disturbing. I believe the first downfall for Atlantis was when they started applying their spiritually advanced abilities for the purpose of self-indulgence and material prosperity.
I don’t want this to happen to life as we know it for us. I am very fortunate to work with some of the best psychics on the internet at Psychic Access. We all have a true gift and we use it to help and guide others, and serve our fellow man. But there are also those in our field who also have the gift, but they use it for self-gain and profit, certainly not to help others. They live selfishly and for self enrichment.
True Love Is About Letting Go
Over the many years of doing psychic readings, I feel the best advice I have ever given clients is to let it be, and let it go. As difficult as it may be sometimes, whenever spirit shows me that toxic love cord connection, while there is still lifelong learning, soul growth and spiritual evolution to be had, then I know that person needs to release the energy that is holding them back and surrender to the flow.
The potential good news is that instead of losing the person we let go, the opposite often happens. Without all the energy attachments of anxiety, fear, obsession and worry, the other person who has been struggling to be separate, independent or free from the one that is holding on, feels the dramatic shift in energy and often change their mind and come around.
There is some real truth to be had from the 1981 rock hit Hold On Loosely by 38 Special that I still love to listen to. That song probably remains popular after all these years, probably because it offers such sensible relationship advice!
People sometimes come to me in turmoil, devastated and in tears, because they think it is over or never going to happen. If I see there is still hope and potential, I advise the client to let go and just go with the flow. The people we love are not always ready when we are. Sometimes we just need to give them a little space and time.
Sooner or later come around if it is meant to be – especially when we no longer spoil them with our constant, undivided attention, emotional coddling and obsessive thoughts. Every time we think of someone they pick up on the energy and begin to take it for granted. So, practicing ‘tough love’ tends to work wonders in the energy realm.
I have sees this advice work for most of my clients over the years, so I am sharing it with you today. If you intuitively feel a strong love cord that connects you with another, and that other person just does not seem to feel it in the same way you do, try just letting go for a while and see what happens. That person often comes around after a time left alone to think, ponder, and maybe go through some personal growth, trials and tribulations. Continue reading
Creating Space For Divine Love
Love has a life of its own. In its true, pure form and spiritual essence, love is a transcendent energy emanating from God – the supreme loving and lovable Source. When love descends from this uppermost divine realm of origin and takes seed in our heart, we can know it is an act, and element of grace that we receive.
When the seed of love is planted in our heart, it is to be watered, nurtured, cultivated, and protected with our life and soul. Love needs space to grow, and nourishment to flourish. It is the quality of consciousness that creates this space and atmosphere for love to thrive.
When tending to the garden of the heart, we must first examine and prepare the foundation. Just as flowering plants would struggle to grow in dry soil, so too will love not readily emerge from a hardened heart. It requires softness, flexibility and receptivity. Love, likewise, needs a base that is rich in qualities to give. Soil stripped of nutrients does not foster growth, nor does a heart that is deplete of a generous, giving spirit.
Furthermore, there are weeds of unwanted things that must be removed to allow for love to expand. Lust, anger, greed, selfishness has no place in the garden of love. Love in its genuine spiritual essence will not take root in an atmosphere surrounded by manipulation, anger, resentment or narcissism.
Again, love has a life of its own. It cannot be pushed or pulled, or ‘gamed’ into being. To truly experience its pure divine scent and flavor, the heart must be open, soft, receptive, giving, honest, respectful, and devoted to the supreme, eternal, transcendent, loving Source.
Finding Hope In A Scary World
The recent events worldwide are terrifying and daunting for most of us. Due to the Covid-19 pandemic our world is not well, and we are all in need of courage, hope and healing.
We cannot control the entire world, or every aspect of our future, but we surely can choose how we react to what is happening to us, and to the world.
Although the world is scary right now, know that there are opportunities for personal and spiritual growth for all of us during this time. Consider the following to make the most of the current circumstances.
Mindfulness
Take a deep breath. Hold it. The release, and repeat. Cultivating a calm, hopeful approach to the challenges we will encounter over the next several months, will bring you peace as you navigate through this time.
Take some time every day to find your calm place within, where you can focus on hope and inner peace. Meditate and calm your fears. Spend some time in your ‘happy place.’
Finding The Calm Within
Be afraid. Yes, be afraid. Be so very afraid! We are currently being bombarded with this message, not only daily, but hourly. People are very worried, anxious and fearful for a variety of valid reasons. To be honest, I believe our greatest source of anxiety is that we no longer seem to have much control over our lives.
In the modern world we have become so conditioned to mindless purchasing, consuming, and discarding, that we hardly give much thought anymore to our daily habits and lifestyle choices, whether useful or not. We also expect and demand certain privileges and freedoms, and it is shocking to have our normal, everyday routines disrupted, especially when we have no idea when things will return to normal.
I feel this is actually the most frightening aspect of the current circumstances for most people. We feel that we have lost control over our lives. And every morning, we tune back into our daily update of doom, gloom and negative dialogue, which of course only resets our fright buttons!
A better way to start your day would be to take a few minutes to reconnect to the safe and secure part of yourself, namely the inner spirit. Here, all is well, all is serene, and all is safe. Become mindful of your breathing and calm your mind. Then do a visualization that creates a sense of joy, peace and serenity.
Guidelines For Spiritual Growth
Spirituality is a wide-ranging concept with many diverse perspectives. In essence it is the process through which our inner being seeks to relate to something bigger than ourselves. It is the search for the meaning and purpose of our human existence. Spirituality is about our soul or spirit, and the unseen realms, as opposed to material things and physical life. It is also the life-long pursuit of inner peace, unconditional love, and existential wisdom and understanding.
Many people believe that the secret to spiritual growth and development can only be found in a book, a lecture, dogmatic belief system, or some other product or service that will magically unlock the doors to spiritual insight, happiness, joy and fulfillment. However, spirituality is a unique, personal path that each of us can explore on our own, from within. The following guidelines may be helpful on your journey towards spiritual fulfillment.
Reflection
The first step in personal spiritual growth is reflecting on your life journey. To be spiritual is to be questioning and inquisitive. Spiritual growth is a process of constantly learning and improving. One must be willing to open yourself to personal and spiritual growth, and by doing this your world opens up and things become less scary.
Holding on to past events keeps us from experiencing new adventures, and the emotional baggage will only weigh you down. Accept your past mistakes and learn from them. Reflect on what changes need to happen for you to move forward.
We are all teachers. We are either teaching someone, or they are teaching us – both good and bad. Learn from your experiences and move on with life.