Self-Help
How To Remain Grateful
In our daily life, it is all too easy to lose sight of the good things. We tend to get lost in negativity and stress, and we are also affected by the opinions and drama of those around us. At times it can be overwhelming.
In these moments we lose our sense of spiritual awareness and connection. I often speak with clients who experience exactly this. Indeed, it takes practice and re-commitment on a daily basis, in order to maintain our balance and inner peace, and remain true to our beliefs and mantras.
One of our own worst enemies is actually our false beliefs about ourselves. It is so easy to allow self-doubt to take over and let the negative thoughts creep in. Self-worth is a daily challenge for most, if not all of us.
To remain grounded and positive, I find that doing my daily gratitude list really helps get me back to that spiritual place within. When you are feeling low, or have had a stressful day, try keeping the following set of reminders posted as a list on your fridge, or somewhere you can see it daily. It will help change your focus.
What am I grateful for today? Who or what made my life easier or better today?
Did I allow negativity to affect me today? How can I remain grounded and avoid that next time?
Is there a better way I can deal with that difficult person or situation?
Meditation Made Easy
No doubt you’ve heard of the many physical, mental and spiritual benefits of meditation. And like many people, you are keen to give it a go, but still don’t know where to start? Well, it doesn’t have to be complicated or intimidating. According to Shunryu Suzuki, the Sōtō Zen master who helped popularize Zen Buddhism in the United States, approaching meditation with a beginner’s mind is actually ideal.
The most common misconception it that meditation is a state of “thinking of nothing” or “clearing your mind.” It is simply impossible to not think at all. One would basically have to be totally unconscious to achieve that. Instead, meditation is a spiritual practice in which we learn to be more mindful – to center, breathe, and achieve greater calm, inner peace and clarity.
Meditation is about embracing whatever is happening in the present moment, but without getting caught up in any of it. Meditation is about going with the flow, instead of resisting or suppressing your thoughts and feelings.
Meditation in its various forms has been practiced by cultures all over the world for millennia. The oldest documented evidence of the practice of meditation has been found in ancient Indian wall art that dates back to approximately 5,000 to 3,500 BC.
Meditation is an awareness practice, or an enhanced state of consciousness. It does not have to be associated with a specific religion or spiritual tradition. Anyone can meditate, no matter what their belief system. It also does not have to involve sitting or lying passively. It can be anything from coloring mandalas, to taking a walk in nature.
How To Overcome Negative Thought Patterns
There are times when one may be feeling very serene, and completely at peace with ourselves and the world. One may even be feeling highly satisfied with the spiritual growth and personal healing you have accomplished thus far. Then, quite unexpectedly, you lose your sense of alignment. You suddenly feel ‘disconnected’ from the source of our being.
This feeling is especially triggered when one feels overwhelmed by life’s responsibilities, or the constant demands of others. And once we slip into this negative state of mind, many deeply buried, unpleasant memories tend to emerge in our consciousness in the form of haunting ‘flashbacks.’
I recently heard a friend referring to this experience as cognitive distortion. We can so easily begin to catastrophize, and expect the ‘other shoe to drop,’ once our anxiety level becomes this amplified. The mind is powerful and under these circumstances we tend to indulge in a lot of ‘what if’ thinking. The mind races, imagining all the worst case scenarios as potential outcomes.
This kind of catastrophic thinking typically takes our mind into two directions. Firstly, it puts a truly negative spin on the current situation. And secondly, it causes us to anticipate all the many, many things that could possibly go wrong in the future.
Polarized thinking is another problem for some of us. This thought pattern is when we only see things in terms of right or wrong, and this can lead to setting unachievable standards for ourselves and others, as well as send our stress levels through the roof! Polarized thinking crops up when we find ourselves basing our hopes and expectations on, for example, getting that dream job, impressing other people, finding our soulmate, becoming famous, and so on.
Aligning Yourself To Attract Lasting Love
When I do readings, many people usually want to talk about their love life. This is a valid and meaningful subject for all of us. Having a meaningful, harmonious and loving relationship is a wonderful part of the human experience. However, it is also true that a relationship often does not solve many of the problems and issues we have as a single person.
It is important to understand that we carry our consciousness with us everywhere we go. If you assume that you will find a relationship that will ‘make you happy,’ then you are deeply mistaken.
Yes, we may draw temporary relational circumstances that allow us to feel a little better about ourselves, but without a firm structure of personal happiness, we will eventually engage in self-sabotaging behaviors that cause the relationship to become unsustainable.
Again, we will carry our consciousness with us everywhere that we go. If we are discontent being single, we will find a way to be discontent in the relationship also.
Every relationship is the product of co-creation. Too often when a relationship does not work out, it is easy to point to the other person and say, “You did this to me.” And it makes sense, because if the original assumption is that the other person will ‘make us happy,’ then we will also make the automatic assumption that the other person can ‘make us miserable.’
Feeling Like You’re Not Good Enough
Sometimes we put our heart and soul into a relationship, only to get cheated on, or dumped for no reason. The main question that usually comes to mind in this type of situation is, “Why am I not good enough?”
Take a moment and consider the relationships of relatives and friends, who have gone through similar a experience. Some people are able to jump right up and move forward, while others sit and wallow in self-doubt and self-loathing – sometimes for years.
Working with many people over the years, one of the biggest eye openers for me has been that it is typically the partner who is left behind, and then struggles to move forward, who compromised the most in the relationship. They usually gave, and gave, and gave, and didn’t receive much in return. Their needs always took a backseat in the relationship. They would sacrifice more and more, until there was nothing left for them to give, while their partner did not change and simply kept using and abusing them.
If you constantly compromise on what you really want from a relationship, the union will at some point simply disintegrate. The other person is never going to magically become someone different. That person you hoped they would become, after you moved in, or after you gave a little more, or after you married them, or after you had a child with them…never shows up. What you see in someone from the start, is simply who they are.
The Pursuit Of Spiritual Healing
Energy healing can takes many forms: physical healing of the body; emotional healing of the heart, mental healing, and soul healing. But ultimately the best form of spiritual healing is holistic healing of the body, heart, mind, and soul.
The nature of a healing session will usually be determined by the healer. The individual may suggest the type of healing they wish to receive, but reputable healers will typically suggest or recommend the best strategy, depending on what they see is most needed. A good healer will assess the situation and determine the best way to proceed with the healing, and which methods to use.
There are basically three categories of energy or spiritual healing: hands-on, hands-free and distance healing. The methods may include chakra alignment, Reiki, meditation, prayer, visualization, acupuncture, psychic reading and intuitive guidance, bodywork, touch therapies, breathwork, pranic healing, shamanic rituals, soul retrieval and soul rescue, shadow work, inner child healing, and past life regression, to name but a few.
Whatever method or technique we choose, one needs to be certain it is suitable for the individual. No single path leads everyone through the process of healing. We need to be sure that we start them on a path along which we they will be able to continue and complete. It does help if the individual that we are working on is open to the process. As healers we must ensure that our clients are in the right head space, and openness is key to having the best from the healing process.
Things Will Always Fall Into Place
During a recent interview for a paranormal podcast, I was asked what the wisest advice or guidance was that my spirit guide or angel had ever given me. The answer was easy, “Fear not, things will always fall into place.”
I was rushing around one day, hurried, feeling like there was just too much I had to do. I was feeling stressed out and anxious. All I wished for was to arrive at a place of stillness and contentment. But I forget at times that we can find stillness and inner peace right now, in any given moment. It is all about perspective and knowing that things change constantly, and our circumstances may very soon be different.
Sometimes we can become trapped in a way of thinking that isn’t good for us. We get into a rut and we feel there is no way out, or that things won’t ever change. But they always do in the end. That is the thing: knowing that circumstances always change and energy is always shifting.
Instead of being sucked into this kind of negative thought pattern, try the following strategies instead.
Keep a positive attitude. Become the energy you wish to attract. Like attracts like.
Visualize to materialize. I like to do this literally right on the cusp of sleep. It really makes things manifest for me easily this way for the next day, or days ahead.