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Facing Yourself As The Other In Your Relationship

click here for a free psychic reading at PsychicAccess.comRelationships are funny things. They are by their very nature designed to elicit the best and worst from the individuals involved in them.

Although it may appear in a relationship as if you are involved with another distinct person, you are, in fact involved with an underlying, obscured part of yourself, which needs identifying and relating to. With appropriate understanding and recognition, you can see your way clear to an insightful experience.

Once having subjected yourself to the nebulous involvement, you will no longer need to refer to your actions with dread of ‘doing the wrong thing,’ or suffering unnecessary hurt. You will comprehend that it is impossible to avoid anything and there is no guarantee associated with the leap into the depths of your own foreboding abyss.

The fact of the matter is that you will emerge unscathed and filled with unmistakable self-knowledge and power attached to the plummeting into the relational depths of tense despair. By facing both the dark side and light side of your vehemently nervous, fretful mind, you will be freed from the bonds of panic and contentious worry that forever plague you.

Your undisclosed, insecure personality, as revealed in the other person, is laden with criticism, negativity and lack of confidence, based upon the premise of unawareness. The guilt, anxiety, and duty you have attached to personal responsibility in the outcome of the relationship is nothing short of nauseating. You are not that important in the material scope of things.

Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves ~ C.G. Jung

Things happen as they do for reasons you have no way of comprehending or appreciating. But, because of the ill-defined sanction you have attached to self-importance, problems ensue. In other words, you luxuriate in the ‘victim role’ in the relationship realm.

When will you finally realize how the ‘ego victim drama’ of emotional superiority affects others, which is mirrored back to you, and the exaggerated lengths you go to, to produce the solicited effect you think you deserve? The reflection in the mirror will not change your partner’s frown until you do!  It’s time to cease dragging around overburdened sulking.

Really, the entire scenes are shown for what they are: boring childish antics. Realizing just how much the unpleasant apprehension and suspicion is felt by everyone who comes within several feet of you, brings a certain clarity too. Observe your immediate atmosphere, closely.

Also, your false need to ‘fix’ the relationship is so blatantly and dramatically apparent that it’s almost funny, if it wasn’t so sad. What can you fix? What do you think needs fixing? Who do you think needs fixing? Red alert: how did you become so elevated as to determine what is actually broken?

Say the word acceptance slowly aloud while facing east. Now, ask yourself: what is really needed? Can you hear the obviousness in the still small voice of truth speaking to you? Certainly not, as long as you are blinded by the betrayal found in your own eyes of disgruntled despair. How could it be that you would possibly hurt yourself with full conscious intent? You don’t. You deny it… and project that pain onto the other.

The feeling of being ‘offended’ is a warning indicator that is showing you where to look within yourself for unresolved issues ~ Bryant McGill

The irrational incident is merely a self-designed, disguised play to cure your incessant need of self-importance.

Time to heal. Steps and ladders are offered in increments, if you want to walk the plank over the barren soil of non-vested interest, in order to receive the truth locked within your deepest mental caverns. What is it you really, really, really want more than anything else in the whole wide world? Well, you can have it. It’s staring you smack dab in the face! But, it does require the act of releasing the need to be always right.

Remember, what lies underneath the hardened ground of defiance is the soil of compromise. Yes, in order to get to it, the top layer must be disturbed and the plants of decay uprooted. Yanked up and stripped clean of the thorns of dismay, the feet are then planted in true fertile ecstasy.

What else will be disengaged?  The deeply embedded overgrown category of plants: disappointment, fear of time running out before you realize your most cherished goals, and past betrayal. Of course, the dreaded culprit of impending and past loneliness provides the ongoing nurtured manure for these thriving plants.

Shake loose the binding force that so easily besets thee, and so shall you breathe deeply and freely for the first time in your current involvement.

Fear of changing direction or communication (ways of doing things) without a clear-cut, decision-making, controlled plan is another crystal clear indication of a breakthrough. Follow suit without knowing what’s to come. Let the ‘not knowing’ be they only knowing! No need to compare or speculate what’s better or worse.

Self awareness is one of the rarest of human commodities. I don’t mean self consciousness where you’re limiting and evaluating yourself. I mean being aware of your own patterns ~ Tony Robbins

Another sign: what are you trying to avoid? Do that first! And, whatever are you have been trying to buildup as a means of security… let it go. Get simple. Shred the ribbon of pretense of concern for the other when it’s actually concern for yourself.

Stop also all striving and competing for affection. If you are the least bit jealous, envious, or concerned over what someone else is doing, then another round of debilitating patterns in emotional depression will be needed before you are released from your current entanglement.

Another red flag: if you are trying to impress, you are in the prickly throws of depression. Forget about it. Get back to uncomplicated, ordinary speaking as quickly as possible. Stop being so secretive. It’s making you sick. Relationship is the domain where you ‘gag at a gnat and swallow a camel.’ Stop sweating the insignificant things. Who cares how fast the race horses ran at Belmont, except for the ones betting and the owners? You are neither!

Get your mouth, mind, eyes, thoughts and comments out of what does not directly concern you. Let the other be. No one is keeping anything from you, and there’s no way for you to know something before the exact moment you need to be aware of it. In other words, be present in this minute.

What’s going on right now? What’s the flavor sensation in your mouth? What do you face when you turn 180 degrees to the right? State the facts, madam… simply the facts. Turn the radio on. What song is playing? It’s all here in the ‘ordinary’ events, not in the ‘would be’ future. Remember, this is as good as it gets.

Before I ask you to sit with me, I must be able to sit with myself. Before I ask you to accept my pain, I have to accept the pain myself. Before I ask you to love me, I have to be madly in love with myself ~ C. Thoth

It is here where the outer circumstances of your life will unfold according to a very specialized and detailed ‘order of the ether’ that you and only you called into existence. Who else on earth do you think did it? Accept it: you’re the real reason for your current involvement as it unravels an existent fact.

It’s your call – every single bit of it. Nobody’s giving you the shaft. You created the story and the characters in the exact manner in which they play their well-defined roles. Stop berating their influential, impacting actions. Cease with your constant irritating interference.

Your incessant need to be heard, seen and praised for being so loving and understanding, patient and tolerant is really rather ridiculous. Give me a break! It’s your ‘soap opera’ day time affair. Do you honestly believe you don’t see you in the mix?  Think again or rewrite the script. It’s your esoteric call. Finally, introduce you to yourself in totality.

About The Author: Paula

Paula's innate metaphysical abilities, artistic talents, and entrepreneurial acumen have mixed wonderfully together to create a social media sensation, one who enjoys great popularity on LinkedIn, Instragram, Facebook, and YouTube. She dispenses not only accurate and intuitive divine wisdom but has artistic offerings that include vibrational soul paintings displayed on the internet, and she is a gifted singer and music producer as well. Her calling as a cosmic therapist led her to be the founder of MODE (Masters of Divine Essence) Cosmic Therapy Research Center, where she's published numerous books, songs and plays, and has held many workshops and seminars throughout the Southeast. She even produced her own program, The Mode of Cosmic Therapy Interactive Television Show that aired on WRTN, in Raleigh, NC, for ten years. Paula is also an avid astrologer who interprets the stars and predicts your chart energies at work. If you'd like a detailed glimpse at your own cosmic blueprint, or you have burning questions that require clear answers, Paula will employ all the tools and talents at her disposal for a reading that will dazzle and transform your life. You can find Paula at

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