A natural question one thinks of, Empath or not, is can one prevent the bad feelings or emotions from ‘re-infecting’ or affecting a relationship that has been marred by past issues?
For example, you both want to get back together, but you find yourself in that person’s presence and feeling angry. I often remind my clients to mind their thoughts, to vent their emotions and to feel authentic pain so that their partners can read them.
As their partners can pick up on them, the question of how to prevent this emotional transference arises. By this I mean, the two people involved can pick up on each other’s negative feelings, and then assume the same feelings, and thus, the relationship gets stuck in a limbo-like situation, because both of you feel the same negative feelings about the past.
If one is to maintain a ‘clean bill of telepathic health’, how can you alter your feelings towards the past, so that you both can move forward in your relationship quickly?
My first piece of advice would be to never keep anything from your partner. I feel, even if difficult, expression, not necessarily communication, is essential. The difference between expression and communication is that expression, like art, is illogical, inconsequential emotional, silly, creative and selfish. This is the true identity and it should be allowed to cry.
This is the most important step in allowing for a relationship to re-emerge. The person has to feel they are being heard. Then they can relax and you can start relating on a less of a power dynamic, and more on trading fears and pain, acknowledging its effects and even allowing for anger to come through regarding judgments.
Remembering that even bad emotions have a place in relationships is a healthier platform to move from than a corrective stance. Yet, one has to be careful not to ‘enable’ the other person to get into a pattern of only complaining. Once a voice is aired, in effect, it loses its power to hurt you, as it feels less like destroying the relationship, or hurting itself, unless the person is continuing to feel injured by you. But you will find that out during real, raw dialogue with your partner.
The same way of thinking should be applied to relationships. It may be important to, like an addict, confess to all the people, or to persons one has wronged to get over the self-destructive behavior. In the same manner your partner should be able to list his grievances in order to find a sane and suitable solution to a problem or a conflict.
1) Identify what your triggers are. By this I mean, what in this person triggers bad feelings? Is it where you meet? Is it the way you communicate? Is it a past relationship, before this person came along, that makes you defensive? When we can anticipate our triggers we can mitigate their effect, by not placing the full responsibility of your feelings on this person.
2) Avoid seeing this person when you are in a generally bad mood. You may transfer your emotions onto the person, as they may interpret your mood as a re-emergence of your resentment.
3) In this person’s presence, remind yourself to ground your energy. This will ensure that your emotions don’t reach out like tentacles ‘reinforcing’ the bad feelings towards the person you love. By grounding I mean you should take all your emotions and transfer them into the earth. Anchor your being to the ground, and envision all your emotions draining into the earth.
4) Build a vision of the future with both of you. Stop thinking about why you broke up, and stop reiterating your need for closure or control over this pain. Sometimes, one has to accept that closure comes through giving up control over a situation, and that it cannot be forced by altering the other person’s attitude, through an apology (though helpful) or by hoping the past will change. The situation is what it is, and accepting the loss will be more helpful than dwelling on the past.
| PsychicAccess.com.Carmen’s waking dreams have provided accurate glimpses into the future for celebrities as well as political and international figures. Her non-judgmental, Empathic approach, as well as her unique method of Tarot reading, affords her the reputation as a groundbreaker in her field. This European born Canadian is the first online psychic to promote the idea of Empathy and emotional thought transference, and she has written a great deal on the subject. For a comprehensive Intuitive reading that will transform your life, you can find Carmen at |
Leave a Reply