My ex was actually a very good empath. I never knew this. I knew him well, but I had no idea that our thoughts were bouncing back and forth between each other. He at first, had no interest in the spiritual, but upon watching me work, he became interested. Then he actually became aware of empathy. I used him as a research tool, and he would occasionally call me and ask me if I was thinking of him, if I needed anything.
Awareness is the key to telepathy and empathy, or any psychic work. We all pick up thoughts, have visions or have psychic impressions or dreams, but we are unskilled in picking them up, and usually uncertain as to what they mean.
My ex found out he was an empath, we both became very aware of the moods that we have, and what we should do to avoid getting into any disagreements in those moods, as they usually simply transferred back and forth to one another.
Let’s say, he had a hard day at work. He comes in the door, and sees me with a migraine. He hates seeing me in pain, but he doesn’t know how to deal with it, and it tenses up. The mood darkens as he enters our apartment. I am lying on the couch, prostrate, with a migraine. I have been asleep, but the moment he enters the room the mood darkens.
It’s not seeing him that makes me feel frustration, its picking up that he ‘transmitted’ his displeasure at seeing me in a position of suffering from discomfort, which now causes both parties additional pain. It is not him that is causing me pain, it is his reaction to my pain that intensifies it for both.
This is true for most closer dynamics in relationships, but usually when there is a high degree of trust this is played out to more of an intensity, not always so in normal or casual social interactions. I will get further into that later on.
Unfortunately, I take it personally, but I should try and understand that this mood is usually transitory and a reaction to seeing him seeing me in pain, and that it is not directed at me personally. If I went deeper, I would feel that he actually felt out of control in not being able to help me, and I should be compassionate and grateful that felt my pain.
But unfortunately he would also assume that his bad mood was because the relationship was not working! In fact, he cannot see the seed that causes the disagreement. In essence they share the same view.
So, he sees himself as erroneous or ‘reacting’ or a ‘defensive’ assumption based on his perception on relationships, and how he should always make me feel better. That’s his own empathic notion to protect me – but it can irritate both of us in the relationship.
So, this dynamic was actually based simply upon assumptions on both parts. This can be actually pretty problematic at times, as the persons will assume that it’s them or their fault the relationship is ‘not working’ whereas in truth, they were just picking up on each other’s bad day. In fact, both of us have no issues, we are both just transmitting each other suffering back and forth, and do not mean to affect each other as negatively.
From our animal past this sense of hyper-attention to sharing emotions can actually maintain a partnership, yet in close quarters, when there is no threat, this can actually be taken out of context and taken personally.
I would give this advice: be aware of your own feelings, get to know yourself. It is beneficial to take time away and measure your emotional state when stable to understand how you may be affecting your partner and in turn, once again, your future emotional states.
About The Author: Carmen’s waking dreams have provided accurate glimpses into the future for celebrities as well as political and international figures. Her non-judgmental, Empathic approach, as well as her unique method of Tarot reading, affords her the reputation as a groundbreaker in her field. This European born Canadian is the first online psychic to promote the idea of Empathy and emotional thought transference, and she has written a great deal on the subject. For a comprehensive Intuitive reading that will transform your life, you can find Carmen at PsychicAccess.com.
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