I recently had the opportunity to care for my 88-year-old mother-in-law for the last year of her life. No member of my family has died in a nursing home, and I had promised none of them would be the first on my watch, so her moving in with us was an easy decision.
Caring for an elderly person is work, she made things as easy for me as she could, but it is still work. There were multiple issues to deal with on a daily basis. She had had Parkinson’s for 18 years and a broken hip two years previously, which caused her much discomfort when it was cold or wet outside. She also had high blood pressure, and she had to have her clotting factor checked weekly. On top of that the love of her life had passed away just two months before she moved in with us. Can you imagine losing someone you had been married to for 67 years?
The first week of July we noticed some odd behavior. She was having vivid, sometimes violent dreams. She also didn’t recognize some of my grand-kids, who had been coming over to visit since she moved in. She would hide money in her bedroom, and then forget where she put it. She also asked my daughter where ‘Opa’ was (Opa is the German word for Grandfather.) The nursing staff believed she had had a stroke.
We understand death for the first time when he puts his hand upon one whom we love – Madame de Stael
She had mobility issues all along and needed occasional help, but the second week of July she needed help getting in and out of bed. She started taking some of her meals in her room and she seemed to have less patience with the toddler who lived here, which was unusual, they were pretty close before. She confided to me that she had been dreaming and talking to her friends, siblings, parents all the people who had passed before her, but not Dad?
The next week she had no appetite, so we switched her diet to a liquid supplement. That week we also had her put on hospice, so we would have access to medical people 24/7 and had some steps taken to make her life easier. By this time she had lost so much weight she looked hollow, fragile.
The last week she just seemed to give up, she refused food, water and most medication, she also quit talking. During this week, the nursing staff felt that she was having a series of small strokes; she had a do-not-resuscitate order in place, so we kept her home. She would allow me to give her the liquid pain medication, but anything else she refused.
During the month of July we all felt the presence of others in her room, sometimes one, sometime more than one. I still never felt Dad, but we noticed she would gaze at the chair in her room with a half smile, as though someone was there with her, and she was much calmer.
Salome, one of the other advisors at Psychic Access, is one of my mentors, and she has been encouraging me to develop my mediumship. I can do it, and I do it, but I don’t like it, so I’ve been pretty resistant. But they do get through, usually in the shower…but that is a whole other story.
To die proudly when it is no longer possible to live proudly. Death of one’s own free choice, death at the proper time, with a clear head and with joyfulness, consummated in the midst of children and witnesses: so that an actual leave-taking is possible while he who is leaving is still there – Friedrich Nietzsche
On July 26, Dad came to me, in the shower of course, and told me that he was taking Mom with him, and thanked me for everything I had done and gave me a message for my husband, his son. The message is how I knew it was Dad. I went in to check on her, and while I was sitting next to her, I felt a very slight movement, then a profound absence, but she was still breathing.
The nursing staff advised us she was in a coma. She had no way to communicate with us, and there is no concrete proof that one can feel or hear in this state, but it is generally believed we can, so I continued with the pain meds, and we continued to talk to her.
On July 29th, I was contacted again…in the shower. I was told that she would be gone before the end of the day, and that I had done a good job, and it was time for me to rest. The reason it took so long to get her was that Dad had a hard time accepting the fact he had passed, and there was some work he had to do in order for Mom to join him. Now the work was done, and her body would stop soon. She stopped breathing three hours later.
When people who have passed give a message, they always give a tidbit of information, so you know it’s them. My mother had a twisted, but great sense of humor, and most of the time she will remind me of a Sunday school song I learned when I was five or six, but this time she gave me the punch line to one of her favorite jokes. It’s not very politically correct, but she sometimes did that. I immediately knew it was her.
| PsychicAccess.com.Indigo is an Indigo child, her gifts have been handed down through generations, and she has used them since she was a teenager. Using a unique blend of, tarot, astrology, numerology, psychology and clairvoyance, she is able to give you the most information in the shortest time possible to help you find a way to change your situation. She has been a spiritual advisor in her community for 20 years and continues her education, while fostering the gifts she has handed down to her grand-children. You can get a reading from Indigo at |
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